Valentine’s Day and ridiculous expectations- 4 months late

Okay, it is not Valentine’s Day but I found this in my old draft of posts and figured better to published four months late than at Christmas. You might enjoy the you tube videos too. =)

This is the first year I noticed less Valentine’s Day commercials and cheesy decorations in the stores. Maybe I am not the only one who’s tired of seeing greeting cards vomiting hearts, teddy bears, and roses. Why is Valentine’s Day such a big holiday in America? Do women really want red roses, chocolates, and jewelry? Or do corporations entice the women to love them? And how are men seduced to buy gifts in the hope of getting laid?

And for kicks, here is a samplings of terrible advertisements:

Feminism, Sexism, and Lingerie

Hairy Swede wrote a great commentary on feminism and sexism in Sweden a few days ago. I thought I would you point you all to his post as well as my comment- expanded below.

When I lived in France, there would be topless women in billboard advertisements. Sexist? Well, maybe because the company was selling lotion. Or maybe not; after all it is just the human body. While we find the French strange, they do have certain liberal ideas to admire: topless beaches, uncensored television, racy print advertisements, condom machines in plazas. Some people say it’s sexist to exploit the female body in such a manner. Is it though? We allow men in tight underwear in Hanes commercials or women cat calling hot construction workers (the Diet Coke ad from the 90s) and no one complains.

But a topless women? Obscene, vulgar, disrespectful. No, it’s advertising, art and pleasuring the senses to buy a product. There are extremes to this case but we’re not going to discuss that here.

Back to Sweden. For Sweden priding itself on equality, some people take it to the extremes. At the end of the day, men and women will never be the same in a biological, evolutionary sense. We can reach a level of equality in society only if we accept that men and women are different and will interpret situations, people, life in their own ways.

However, some feminists believe it is possible for society to exist in a perfect equilibrium between the sexes. But, a consequence of extreme feminism is male submissiveness. The men in Sweden are run over by the women. They are told what constitutes equality and told how to behave, thus creating a unisex society. We can agree on some great aspects of Swedish equality, but creating a more than equal society for women at the expense of men is unfair.

So ladies in Sweden, let there be hot lingerie advertisements. Take a lesson from the French: the female body is beautiful; might as well adorn it. The Swedish men could surely use some fire in their lives.

The most entertaining conversation ever

I was telling this story to a friend and she nearly died of laughter. You just can’t keep it to yourself.

Here’s the background:
Dude and I are entrenched in a conversation. It is important to note the dude is Swedish and the total lack of inhibition in his questioning is either due to his Swedish liberalness or his adorable naivety. Or maybe he was being a male (cute but silly).

We are discussing American politics, global affairs, etc. then eventually delve down into American conservatism. This inevitably leads to a conversation about gay rights…
Me: It’s really aggravating to witness a country that prides itself on “freedoms” and equal rights can prohibit two people from getting married. Makes me angry.
Sven*: So, are you a lesbian? [continues eating]
Me: [shell-shocked…WTF?!!…ask that question in the South mister and we’ll teach you where you can put that rifle…]
Me: [actually says] No.
Me: [still confused, flustered, embarrassed] No, I really like my men. Yeah…
Sven: [eating peacefully] Okay, that’s good then.

Later in the conversation…
Sven: I saw your photo. You have more hair and look different.
Me: [Why, you little…!!! – Imagine a Homer strangling Bart moment]
Me: Uhhh, yah that photo was when I was in college, 5 years ago. I also lost some hair b/c of my vacation in Iceland.
Sven: Ahhh.
Sven: You still don’t look bad.

*name changed to protect privacy but maybe not the privacy of the 50,000 people named Sven

Sven made me so irate that I was not sure if I wanted to strangle him or kiss him. He had the balls to say ridiculous things but do them in an innocent manner.

And not realizing that (the lesbian thing) was a loaded question was a true kicker. Coming from the South, I can guarantee someone would have punched him in a best case scenario. Worst case: a rifle up his ass.

Online Dating…Part 3

Okay! I officially switched networks to Stockholm and put up a photo a few days ago. Sadly, that has not stopped weird Spanish speaking people from “winking” at me…Maybe I signed up for the Match.espana instead of sverige? haha. And, let’s not forget the 40-60 year old males winking. Ewwwww…

But! Some profile observations on those Swedish guys:
* They begin their profile description: “I’m a nice and happy fellow” Someone should tell them, we’re pretty sure they’re nice…but hopefully they are not serial killers. =P
* There’s the “athletic” photo: Skiing, snowboarding, diving, swimming, running – because we have to see their great bodies and watch them being sweaty. (No complaints though)
* There’s a “party” photo: Yes, they have to prove they can drink öl…lots of öl
* Most are at least 180cm tall. Yes!
* They love sports, music, and the museum. Wow…sounds like an oxymoron if you were in America
* They all claim they are athletic and somehow I believe them
* And let’s not forget the “dress shirt” photo- hot tailored shirt on a swede…sounds good to me
* They like smart, athletic, women [how profound =P ]

What I’m really curious about is whether the Swedish male will “wink” first or if I have to do it. Does the internet make the connection more anonymous and therefore easier to initiate contact? I sent a few “winks” and we’ll find out.

Love through Materialism

You know when it is Christmas in the United States for two reasons: 1) car commercials; 2) love can only be expressed through a diamond of some sort. DeBeers, Kays, Jared…the list goes on.

Men are told that they need to buy some shiny, hard, graphite object in order to show their love for their women. Women are told, they should expect expensive gifts so they know their men love them. How bizarre. Why is it that men in America must buy material goods to satisfy their women? They pay for dates, buy flowers, chocolates and jewelry, and hope for a little action in return.

Shouldn’t men just show their love by maybe…cooking dinner? giving a massage? going for a hike?

And shouldn’t women not have such have such high expectations?

Now, it is nice to get gifts. I don’t deny that. A guy buys me something I want is endearing. But, if he buys me stuff because he feels he needs to, he feels that social pressure…that is wrong.

My friend put it well, “both sexes need to take part in the responsibilities of dating.” Women should not expect the men to run around after them all the time. Women should do some chasing. Take care of the men a little.

Next time you see a diamond commercial, ask yourself “what is the benefit of him buying that diamond? Does society want him to? Or does his gf/wife/lover want him to?”

And…does “every kiss begin with Kay” ?? If that is true, men are definitely screwed for life. Sad.