Victoria Silvstedt vs Maria Montazami – Twins or What??

I have been confused for a long time. I thought Maria Montazami was Victoria Silvstedt and vice versa. Seriously, as Swedish women go, they fulfill every sterotype possible.

Let’s see them shall we:

They are:
blond
blue-green eyed
long haired (curls are thanks to the curling iron though)
big boobied – but Victoria’s does win the fake boobs contest
button nosed
poorly tanned
botoxed

Differences:
Victoria is usually found in lingerie, bikinis or nothing at all.
Maria wears long dresses and there isn’t a photo on the web of her in a bikini. For real!

Victoria earns her living as a model and being a Playboy Playmate.
Maria earns her living by being a Svenska Hollywoodfru.

Victoria is 37 years old and from Bollnäs-
Maria is 46 years old and from Västerås.
Damn… they’re both getting up there!

Maria’s awkward Ving travels ad

Victoria’s Betsafe Casino ad

Well, for Swedish girls and girls in general they’re both pretty darn hot. But I think Maria is more natural looking and less plastic surgery’ish.

Top 5 Hot Swedish Women

Today’s top five is dedicated to lovely and hot Swedish actresses and models, and even a Swedish Princess.

Greta Garbo
Classic and edgy, there’s no one who doesn’t know the fabulous Greta.

Victoria Silvstedt
She’s a Playboy bunny and a real Swedish bikini model. Victoria is the quinessential blond, busty, blue eyed girl we all know as Swedish women.

Ingrid Bergman
Ingrid is the sweet, beautiful Swedish girl that our parents fell in love with. Even today, you can still fall in love with her.

Maud Adams
She was never a great Swedish actress but she was a Bond girl, twice. Adams was the villan girl in The Man with the Golden Gun and Octopussy. Boy was she a Swedish babe!

Princess Madeleine of Sweden
She’s dating again but no rock on the finger. I think she’s adorable.

A Collection of Swedish Girls

Since I’ve received number complaints from Swedish girls that not all Swedish girls are blond or beautiful, I thought I would photos of the beautiful, ugly, brunette, and orange.

Sorry guys for bursting your happy bubbles. But at least Humon who created Scandinavia and the World has an awesome sense of humor.
Read her comics because they are to die for funny.
(Image is copyright of SATW)

Okay…they are blonde Swedes…

and they are too…

but brunettes do exist!

Oooooo, kissing Swedish girls!
kissing swedish girls
… sure is a lot of kissing.

too much boobage and eyelashes?

This photo is tragic. Why must women look like this? Duckface, fake boobs, bleached blond hair, and botox.

Phew, good ole classic Swedish girls

…orange is not a skintone

The unfortunate part was after looking through a few hundred club photos of girls on Stureplan and Finest.se, less than ten photos had girls of non-Swedish ethnicity (read, colored girls). I can see why immigrants feel unwelcome in Sweden.

Ladies, do not despair, a collection of Swedish men is coming up shortly!
swedish men in underwear

The New Questions on Swedish Dating

It’s that time again! The dying questions for swedish men is chock full of goodness of information.  Before we start on our new questions about swedish dating, here’s a summary of what we know about swedish men and women.

Swedish men:
Are very good listeners
Are quiet and shy
Help doing house work
Cook dinner, breakfast or a little smörgås
Give the look
Are respectful
Like foreign girls (who doesn’t like anything exotic?)

Swedish women:
Want romance too
Love confident men
Are beautiful
Like foreign men
Are sensitive at heart

And now the A-Z of questions we still discuss and ponder about.  A big thanks to all the readers who continuously comment and share their love stories.

  • If I like you (i’m a girl), can I text/call you first?
  • Can you summarize Swedish dating culture in one/two words?
  • Is Swedish boy interested in me if we chat online for several months and have wonderfully intense conversations?
  • Do you think some Swedish men can fall in love with a woman that is curvy or a few extra pouds or is this a sign of laziness with their culture?
  • Do Swedish men prefer texting/emailing to phone calling?
  • What is the best place in Stockholm to find a Swedish guy?
  • Do Swedish women give the look too?
  • What in general seems to be the Swedish man’s standing point on women who have children from a previous relationship?
  • Do Swedish men give compliments randomly to women? If not, are they trying to hit on the girls?
  • What are signs of flirtatious behavior?
  • Why do men need to be on the verge of blacking out to hit on women?
  • Does the ‘player’ culture exist?
  • How the hell do you ask out a swede?? or make “a move” on him?
  • Do they like blonds or brunettes?
  • Is it true Swedes are very rude?
  • Is it true that Swedes hate monogamy?
  • Do they fall in love really hard?

It’s not easy dating Swedish women.  And the swedish male proves to be both confusing and amusing.  Just remember, they’re still people too, and sometimes a man is just a man.

Yes, Swedish Girls are Beautiful

The rumors are true. Swedish girls are pretty. They’re gorgeous. Swedish girls can really be hot; and I’m a girl saying this. In the US, you’re lucky to find girls that are 7 or above, the average is a 2 or 3. In Sweden, the average girl is at least 4 and it is easy to find 7s or 8s. Pretty amazing from coming from the polar land way north on Earth.

I collected some photos of the hot swedish women and posted them up. It’s summertime in these photos; surely it would be nice if our snowy dark weather ended and we could have this kind of fun. You can check out a full photo collection of Swedish girls.

Male readers out there, this should inspire you on how to find a Swedish women and also how to pick up girls. Or at the very least, enjoy the photos.

And to us mere mortals out there, we are still damn hot, not just in that Swedish way.

At Midsommar party:
swedish girls midsummer

Girls Love Sports Too

Celebrating Christmas in Stockholm

The Hottest Swedish Lingerie Model – Victoria Silvstedt
swedish lingerie model

svenska tjej victoria silvstedt

Bikinis, bikinis, bikinis: Stop staring at the screen
swedish girls bikini

Another beautiful blond
beautiful blonde swedish girl

Swedish Girls Celebrating Stockholm’s Summer
hot-swedish-girls

Umm, you wanna be a Pick Up Artist?

It’s been a long time since I wrote anything about dating in Sweden. Frankly it’s a bit difficult when you are tied in a monogamous relationship that is quite happy. I mean, no one, not even myself, wants to hear about how happy and mushy gushy a relationship is.

But now it is winter and -25C outside and time to start writing, serious writing, Henry David Thoreau style.

In a week I will be joining in, as a special visitor to a day game seminar and field training on how to pick up beautiful women. And these beautiful women are in Sweden. In the cold-hearted country up north.

With whom? And why? And what’s wrong with you Sapphire? Those pick up artists guys are just douche bags trying to pick up hot chicks. Well, no not really. Pick up artists (though can hold a negative connotation) is a person who is skilled at seducing another person. These people are really seduction artists. The insanely famous book The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists by Neil Strauss (the brilliant New York Times writer) delves into the world of meeting beautiful women who are smart and sexy and actually like you back.

Since I’ve become fascinated by PUAs, a couple months ago I went out for a beer with Jeremy Soul, the most famous day game master of all. And folks, he’s a really nice chill guy. So cool that I’m going to be attending his workshop to learn more and pick his brain about dating in Sweden. You can read a lot about the nature of relationships on his blog.

And follow along with me on how to pick up Swedish girls.

Group Sex and Swedish Women

I was eating a delicious lamb roast when we got into the discussion of Swedish women.  Because of course Swedish girls are like little lambs:  soft, sweet, and delicate.

There were a couple friends who happened to be single males, and well, sans blond Swedish girls.  Of course, one single Asian girl (on her quest to find a Swedish man in Sweden) had to ask the single boys why they were not sambos yet.  The answer:  Swedish women are formal in nature and too feminist.  The guys said there was no spark.  No silly fun  with the women they dated.  They missed feeling the little bubbles of energy between a couple.  And some girls were so independent the men felt emasculated.

But a third guy, a potty mouthed hilarious Indian, chimed in that Swedish women really want a manly man.   The whole ultra feminist attitude is just a song and dance cover that they enjoy the delicateness of being a girl and want to be taken care of.  His solution?  Hold your ground and don’t become like the Swedish man just because you are dating a Swedish girl.  Be the man, continue your cultural ways, and love her to bits.

Of course this brings me to the title of the post, group sex.   Because I bet that’s why you’re reading this post.  First, a bit about funny Swedish laws.  A Swedish school teacher was convicted of buying sexual services (remember selling prostitution is legal, buying is not) but he cannot be fired from his job.  He also seems to be a mastermind organizing group sex between professionals and girls, where some girls were paid.  Of course, to him, no biggies.

And since “criminality outside of the workplace usually isn’t sufficient cause for firing,” says  Sofie Rehnström (legal expert with the Swedish Trade Union Confederation (LO)), group sex is an all go even if you pay for it.   Hey, we’re in Sweden, violating the law is like getting a spanking.  Except spanking is illegal.

Going back to our dinner discussion, we learned that group sex at some of the Swedish universities exist.  As recently as 2004 at least.  How it works you ask?  There’s a sign up sheet on the bulletin board with a date and time (location is the same) and you just sign up.  And then show up and have fun.   I’m not sure where this puts sexual nature on the map in Sweden, but surely somewhere.

While some Swedish students are pursuing group sex in college, others are trying to figure out how to effectively date a Swedish girl.  Then they figure the group sex thing is easier then courting the Swedish bombshells.

It’s kinda like getting stuck in the revolving door.

The Swedish Bikini Team – Blond Goddesses who have a dirty secret

When I was small, I would hear about the Swedish Bikini team.  They were blond Swedish women who were of course busty and beautiful. They arrived in 1991 and remained part of pop culture legend. But the Swedish Bikini team has a dirty little secret, one that thousands, if not millions, of men did not know: the bikini girls were not Swedish.   They were not Scandinavian. The Swedish Bikini Team was made up of… Americans! American girls with blond wigs. The horror of it all, to be deceived that your blonde Swedish goddess is just an American girl, like Jane or Heather or Peggy.  Or Suzanna or Avalon even; okay those are the real life names of the women who played the Swedish women. Everyone was outraged over this, even NOW, the National Organization of Women. Well, I heard they protested on gender grounds though.

And who hired the American girls to be Swedes? Old Milwaukee beer.  The men in the ads (one is below) were saved by the Swedish girls with beer. Good, refreshing American beer. And that was it.  The ad ran for several months before protests popped up, and then the ad disappeared into pop infamy.   You can search online for Swedish bikini team photos, there are plenty out there.

So what happened to the original bikini team?  If you have a subscription to Playboy, you can see what’s over and under these scantily clad women.

Some of these ladies really capitalized on their ‘swedishness.’  But then as luck would have it, in 1999, the SBT franchise sought “real” Swedish women to be the bikini girls.   They called it:  Beauty, Brains Bravery.  Stop laughing, it’s not that lame, just enormously terrible. With the brilliant BBB slogan (DDD would have been more fun), the franchise found their Swedish blonde bombshells and off they went to make super cheesy movies.  One was titled, Never Say Never Mind.  And these girls are all about sci fi awesomeness.  I’ll stop there, in case you men are getting turned on by space fighting Swedish girls.

playboy swedish bikini team

And here is it the sad but beautiful truth of the Swedish bikini team.

Meet a Beautiful Blonde Swedish Girl? Dating Swedish Women isn’t Easy

Swedish girls are everything what you fantasize about. They are tall, beautiful, blonde (although artificially blond dyed hair), busty, athletic, and strong. These viking women are the enigma wrapped in a conundrum because the men still haven’t figured them out.

If dating Swedish men was confusing enough, then dating Swedish women must be more so. I’m a girl, an American-Indian girl, and therefore am not Swedish. But I have a few Swedish girlfriends and they all have opinions of their fellow male counterparts. Some comments are downright ballsy. Swedish guys have done a good job of losing their balls over the years, part thanks to feminism, part thanks to super tight jeans that served as self castrating devices.
Swedish Girls
First off, if you are man, Swedish, French, American, British, you have to learn how to smooch and booze with those hot Swedish women. A lot of booze, it helps.  Second, it seems that foreign men in Sweden have an advantage over the Swedish men.  Be happy and use it wisely.

Here’s what Swedish women think of Swedish men:

  • Kinda shy – the men just watch you and wait forever before they will come speak to you.
  • Difficult to figure out
  • Snåla – a bit greedy and stingy, swedish men don’t invite girls out much
  • Too dependent on alcohol – the boys drink to get drunk, and it’s very gross. If swedish men learned to drink for pleasure and not got wasted, it would be easier to have a conversation and think they are sexy. In Southern Europe, people drink wine, beer, alcohol with class. Up in Scandinavia, people drink like the end of the world is coming. Plus, drinking a glass of wine on a Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday is akin to alcoholism, yet it’s okay to get wasted drunk from Thursday to Saturday. Where’s the moderation?
  • No alcohol = no conversation, the Swedish boys have no ability to communicate without the clutch of alcohol
  • Too emotionally distant and far away

What Swedish women LIKE/ WANT Swedish men to do:

  • Be courteous – maybe open doors, pull out chairs, a little bit of chivalry is good
  • If you invite someone for dinner, then you could at least pay for it!
  • Buy a gift to show your affection; it’s nice to receive presents
  • Have some balls and guts and speak to me! “Hi, what’s up” does not count.  We want  to talk about real stuff, not just the weather.
  • Stop counting every krona spent at a meal, it’s embarrassing to decide who got what drink, what side dish, etc.  Can’t we just split the bill like normal people?
  • Be a man and stand up for what you want

After reading all these comments you must think, “damn, how do Swedish men and women mate and have lots of babies?”  I wonder that too, and I’ll put the blame on the dark swedish winter and the bright swedish summer.  You also must think that Swedish women hate their fellow men.  It’s part true, more Swedish women are interested in foreign men than they are in other Swedes.  Boredom, lack of balls, and overall disappointment are contributing factors.

What can you learn from this?  Like I said, if you are male and not Swedish, you already have a leading position.  If you have the ability to speak to girls without being a pussy and make good conversation, again, major brownie posts.  And finally, if you have some gentlemanly qualities,  the beautiful blond Swedish girls will be all over you.

As my friend put it:  Swedish blond bombshells may be tough and viking-like on the outside, but they are still soft, delicate women on the inside.  A Swedish woman deserves to be treated as such.

PS – I’m well aware that this post constitutes a generalization. Please don’t comment that I’m stereotyping and stereotyping sucks, wah wah wah. Everyone generalizes; get over it. Your comment will not be approved.

Please however comment on something more constructive. Perhaps why Swedish women have a reputation of being blond/beautiful or why the negative reputation of being “sluts.” Or your experience dating a Swedish girl or being a Swedish girl and dating.