Fine Dining at a Swedish Restaurant

I heard this from a reader and just couldn’t stop laughing. Now I know we pick on men a lot for saying dumb things, but this, from a Swedish girl, is priceless.

An English guy who is dating a Swedish girl asked her to take him to a nice Swedish restaurant in Sweden.

Knowing that there were just too many Swedish restaurant choices, she took him to the one place with universality when it comes to food.

Blindfolded, they took the train and bus to this mysterious restaurant. When she took the blindfold off of him, the English boy saw “I K E A” in giant, yellow letters on the side of a building.

“IKEA?! Isn’t this a furniture store, not a restaurant,” he exclaimed.

“No älskling, there’s also a restaurant in here too!”

They went to the restaurant on the 4th floor and ordered meatballs with lingonberry jam and mashed potatoes. It was after all, only 35SEK for 16 pieces.

“Just so you know dear, this isn’t a restaurant. It is a bloody canteen in a furniture store.”

“Yes, but you wanted Swedish meatballs didn’t you?”

Lesson learned – before you ask to go to a Swedish restaurant on a date, find out if they serve meatballs for 35SEK. And I wonder if you would go dutch.

Thanks for Your Support for the SOPA Blackout Protest

Just a thanks to you readers who supported our blackout to protest SOPA and PIPA. More than 4.6 million people signed the Google petition alone.

And Twitter.com CEO Dick Costolo, said Wikipedia’s blackout is: “… just silly. Closing a global business in reaction to single-issue national politics is foolish.” Who’s foolish now poop head?


Should these laws ever go into effect, even if rewritten, sites like mine may never see the light of day again. Facebook, Tumblr, Flickr, WordPress, and even Google will have one hellava of a time.

But, first a public service announcement from Senator Chris Dodd, president of the MPAA {Motion Picture Association of America}:
“Only days after the White House and chief sponsors of the legislation responded to the major concern expressed by opponents and then called for all parties to work cooperatively together, some technology business interests are resorting to stunts that punish their users or turn them into their corporate pawns, rather than coming to the table to find solutions to a problem that all now seem to agree is very real and damaging.

It is an irresponsible response and a disservice to people who rely on them for information and use their services. It is also an abuse of power given the freedoms these companies enjoy in the marketplace today. It’s a dangerous and troubling development when the platforms that serve as gateways to information intentionally skew the facts to incite their users in order to further their corporate interests.

A so-called “blackout” is yet another gimmick, albeit a dangerous one, designed to punish elected and administration officials who are working diligently to protect American jobs from foreign criminals. It is our hope that the White House and the Congress will call on those who intend to stage this “blackout” to stop the hyperbole and PR stunts and engage in meaningful efforts to combat piracy.”

I never knew Hollywood hated gimmicks!

For more reading about the United States Congressional bills titled HR 3261 and S968, visit:

Learn More

Information on H.R.3261 – Stop Online Piracy Act at OpenCongress.org

EFF Blacklist

Information on S.968 PROTECT IP Act at OpenCongress.org

In Fight Over Piracy Bills, New Economy Rises Against Old

Reddit /r/SOPA FAQ

Problematic language in the bill pointed out by a redditor.

Video examination of bill’s language.

Get Involved

Electronic Frontier Foundation: Petititon to Stop SOPA Legislation

List of companies that have expressed support for SOPA or PIPA.

List of companies that have expressed concern with SOPA and PIPA.

Take Action Checklist at Stop American Censorship.

Contact Your Representative with info and a widget to find them by EFF and Wired for Change.

Directory of Representatives

Senators of the 112th Congress

Helpful info on making phone calls to your Senator or Representative.

SOPAOpera.org keeps track of where your Congressmembers stand on PROTECT-IP and SOPA.

And a very funny but serious video about the consequences of these laws. Thanks to A for sending it to me.

The irony if this video is taken down for copyright violation.

Google’s Translate Sexism – Women are Stupid

A poorly translated phrase started going around the Swedish speaking community. It’s no surprise Google Translate is stupid at translating currencies and nationalities, but this was one, a bit out of line:


Män är män – men are men
och – and
män är dumma – men are stupid
men – but
Män är män och män är dumma – men are men and women are stupid

You can try this out in Google Translate Swedish to English.

Not sure what Google is trying to say, but I am a women.

Major Server Problems – Please be Patient

Update: November 29, 2011 22.32 UTC+1
We seemed to solved all the server side and front end problems.

As you can see, there’s a facelift on the site and thus far I’m REALLY happy with this new theme.

Would love to hear your thoughts on the redesign!
———————————
We are experiencing significant problems with timeouts and the loss of the CSS theme. The current theme overwrote itself and didn’t issue a warning. Note to self, never use Constructor theme again!

We hope to fix this by tonight.

Thank you.

Sapphire

Weird Comments I Receive

I get a fair amount of comments everyday. Most of them are approved. Some of them though are bizarre. Or weird really. I wrote about stupid emails I received a while ago, and well, the stupidness is not letting up. It’s a contagious disease really.

Most of the time I am asked to matchmake and help some lonely chap in some wartorn country find a Swedish girl to marry so he may move here and leech off the system. Or I should find some guy a blond, beautiful Swedish girl despite his LOLspeak and lack of any chivalry whatsoever.

And sometimes, people are just weird or mean.

Most of everything that is mentioned is a lie. Obviously the writer is an uneducated idiot for not planning ahead. Maybe he should take a trip to Djibouti, Africa and tell us how he likes that. I lived in Sweden for 10 years and have met the greatest people on earth.

– David Edbom
According to David, bad people come from Africa, especially Djibouti. He must really hate black people. Extra points for being too stupid to identify my gender.

 

This post is crap I have studyed in Sweden and it’s very hard to find any swedish woman they prefer only swedish guys..they don’t even like to talk to foreigners.

– Svenska
Okay, not the worst comment in the world, but certainly not stating anything new that another commentor hasn’t already pointed out.
 

please ,please i want a swedish girl, contact me now.

– charl
please, please please, learn engrish. it be good 4 u.
 

Swedish girls are boring, snobbish and think to the be the only on the whole earth to have… (you imagine what). They do not touch a pan, never clean the house and want to rule men. Moreover, they do not give a shit about their boyfriedn and go to be with everybody is from abroad or when they are drunk. Finally, they make kids just in order to get married and take possession of the house (bought by the men).
Swedish (and nordic) men are fed up about them. That’s why they do not react anymore. Otherwise, when there is a no Swedish woman around they change attitude totally.

– Alex
Again, not the worst comment but the antagonizing nature didn’t really add value. Plus other commentors pointed out how some Swedish girl leech off the men.
 

@zenobia

You are most welcome to sweden, unlike the owner of this blogg you seem to be a well brought up and polite person. I agree with everything you wrote.

Kind regards

Lars

– Lars W
I know! Those people are really horrible for actually writing their opinion and you being gullible enough to spend time to write comments to people you don’t know.

 

I like swedish girls, I wants to marry here (a Beutiful and charming One) and have a fun. I am Indian guy frequently visit swenden. Call me +91 9540172807.

– Mahendra Singh
You may visit Sweden, but run your comments through a spell check. Did you really give your phone number??? That’s just stupid.
 

Dear Sir or Madam :
I have been trying to meet a swedish lady for a date ( as i hae been advice by some of my friend that are hapy with they swedish brides and girlfriend ) but i couldn’t find a swedish dating agency to be registered.
I would be very grateful if you could help me about that.
Thank You
Your Faithfully
Shahin Askari

– Shahin
Dear Sir and/or Madam.
You are a moron to think I am a dating website/coach/whatever. Please use this amazing service called Google to find dating companies in Sweden.

Also, Swedish brides are a coveted commodity as your friends could verify. The cost to own or rent one is prohibitively high and requires a one million dollar deposit. Please contact my Nigerian friends to complete the transaction. :

 

…you lack any and all argumentative tactics, effective rhetorics, empathy for your fellow human beings no matter their nationality, open-mindedness and an understanding of any culture other than your own…this post does leave me curious about your own psychological state…

-O’Green
While O’Green wrote a couple great comments, I take issue with the above quote. It is rather fascinating that while it’s okay to insult me and question my ability to a functioning person, it’s really not okay to criticize or make general assumptions. And if you have problems with me making generalizations then perhaps don’t make assumptions about people you don’t know in real life.

 

You are clearly a fat, dumb narrow minded and judgemental person. Get the fck out of my country. We dont want you here. BYE!

– Essace
Essace happened to be routed via a Belgium IP address. I’m not sure then which country I’m supposed to get out of. Belgium, Sweden, or the interwebs?

 

Yeah, I don’t drink since I know it’s bad for you.

-C.P.
Facepalm. I have no idea what this person is trying to say.

Techno Viking: The Dancing Swedish Police Officer

Wondering what the Swedish Police are doing on a sunny summer afternoon? Dancing. In Malmö. At Stortorget. At least one police officer.

Wow, amazingly awesome no words can describe it. Now we know how the police solve cases in Sweden: by dancing.

Even ABC news in America picked up on the story. Some cops just wanna have fun. And some cops just wanna chill out.

May I Borrow your Toilet?

Saturday nights in Sweden are normally filled with booze, stupid behavior, and downright ridiculously funny antics.

Like the guy who leaves the nightclub so drunk that he pees next to a police car (true story). Or a bouncer who punches a potential customer because he’s pissed off. Or the fact that a friend drinks so much alcohol, he’s not quite sure how he got home at 7am wearing someone’s cowboy hat.

Every once in a while though, the debauchery comes to you, first class, to your front door. Saturday night, Þorbjörn and I were hanging out at home since I wasn’t feeling too well. Around 11pm someone starting banging on the door. Seriously BANG BANG BANG, desperation or pissed-offness is on the other side.

Þorbjörn went to answer the door while I stayed in the living room. I could hear two people: one youngish sounding male and one female voice, one that an old fat lady would have.

Then in a funny semi-deepish voice “hej, jag vet att detta kommer låta lite märkligt, men skulle jag kunna få låna din toalett? Jag är väldigt, väldigt kissnödig” – basically “hi, i know this sounds a little strange, but can i borrow your toilet? I really really need to pee.”

Before I knew it, some strange guy was peeing in our bathroom (presumably in the toilet) and the other, the funny sounding fat lady was telling Þorbjörn jokes. Evidently they came from the party upstairs and were too stupid to use the toilet before leaving. After coming down one flight of stairs, peeing was imminent.

After the Swedish guy’s relief, they both took off. Þorbjörn returned and noted that was completely bizarre. I asked about the fat lady and he looked at me funny.
Him: “What fat lady?”
Me: The girl you were talking to?
Him: “Ohhh, that was a skinny Swede who sounded like he had no balls.”
Me: Hahahaha…oppps.
Him: “Yea, and I couldn’t understand the Norwegian, except that he was desperate to pee. I figured we should lend him our toilet.”

Good idea, nothing beats a terrible night then a Swede with a fat lady voice and Norwegian that is desperate to pee.