10 Commandments of being a Pick Up Artist

After taking the blue pill and heading down the rabbit hole of the pick up artist industry, I learned a lot of the industry teachings is about instilling common sense and confidence in men.

This is third part to my series about the Stockholm Sweden Day Game Workshop I attended under the dating coach Jeremy Soul and under the Love Systems Corporation.
Part I: Umm, you wanna be a Pick Up Artist?
Part II: Playing THE Game by Challenging Darwin’s Game

On a side note, Love Systems is the company that evolved from Mystery Method, as made famous by Neil Strauss’ book, The Game. Love Systems is today riding high on crack because of its ability of taking the pick up artist industry (PUA) and turning it into a scientific method.

The training
Four hours in the classroom and four hours in the field. For those counting beans, the whole workshop is $1495 for the day. Yes, US Dollars. C’mom boys, give me your Benjamins and i will teach you the way into a woman’s universe. While it is pricey for a cheap bastard like me, I highly recommend it if your love life is in a rut and needs to be kicked started again.

And what did we learn? I created my list that is inspired by Jeremy Soul. ALL these commandments are important for even the Swedish man to find a girl; after all, we do spend plenty of time complaining that Swedish men are bad at picking up Swedish girls.

Sapphire’s 10 Commandments of Meeting Women:

  1. 1. Accept Rejection –  It happens to all of us: we are rejected by some pretty guy or girl.  Don’t be disheartened; throw out the negative thoughts and move on.  And while you may have sulked and cried about it in the past, don’t do that now.  It’s wasted tears and energy.
  2. 2. Don’t Expect to Get Every Girl – Going hand in hand with Commandment 1, not every girl is attracted to you and vice versa.  Sometimes you will see a beautiful girl and then start talking to her and realize, “blaggg, this one is emotionally vacant for me.”  That’s cool, just go talk to another girl.
  3. 3. Be Confident – Working through the rejection part is the first step of being confident.  Love your work, your hobbies, your friends, your family and you will be confident. Exuding confidence is akin to pheromones; women go crazy when they see men who are sure of themselves.
  4. 4. Have a Personality –  Have you spoke to someone who had the personality of a cardboard box?  It was so painful that you wanted to recycle them or crumple them up right away.  Be creative and excited about your life.  If you don’t know how to have fun with your life, why should any girl care about you?  And be sure to demonstrate that you have a personality, ie. “I love running everyday” or “Hiking on the glaciers was the best sport I ever did” Whatever it is, show the girl that you have a personality.
  5. 5. Don’t Be Drunk – Biggest turnoff ever. EVER.  Drunk guys do not produce good pick up lines.
  6. 6. Have a Good Wingman – Wingmen are the guys that you go with when meeting women, especially in the evening.  Having a wingman will allow you to have a higher status and meet girls in groups.  And a good wingman is a guy who can back you up, know when to step down, entertain the other girls, and overall, make you look good.
  7. 7. Try, Try, Try Again – Don’t give on picking up women, it is tantamount to romantic suicide.  Be confident that you have the ability to speak to women and that you are decent guy just trying to make his way.
  8. 8. Travel –  Traveling away from your comfort zone will force you to interact and meet new people.  You will also have fun stories to share and broaden your knowledge of the word.
  9. 9. Poor Posture will Kill You, Literally – Stop slouching and stand up straight.  Remember when your mom bugged you to not hunch over?  Keep you back straight, shoulders back, and stomach tucked in (not sucked in).  Poor body language sends a subconscious message that you have low self esteem.  If you are approaching Swedish girls especially, they love confident looking men.  A slouchy guy who doesn’t stand properly is not that.
  10. 10. Pick Up Lines Must Not Be Lame – The “Hey baby, how’s it going?” line is so lame is makes me laugh and cry every time I hear it used.  Or the “What’s your name sweetheart?  Can I get your number?” Nooo, why the fuck should I give you my number, I have no idea who you are creepy bastard.

11 thoughts on “10 Commandments of being a Pick Up Artist”

  1. I think these are rules more applicable in U.S. rather than in Europe. People here is scared about people you do not know very well the backround.

    Picking up girls simply walking on the street or entering into a bar is normal only in the movies.

    Much better in my opinion at least in Italy:

    1) The University/ school
    2) Workplace
    3) wedding parties
    4) Friends invitation
    5) Ski clubs (unbelievable)
    6) Dance club ( not discos but places where you dance Tango, waltz.. etc)
    7) Trains
    8) Villages for summer holidays
    9) Private beaches
    10) ….. ?

    You’ll be surprised how people change their behaviour when meet in these places

    I don’t believe is different in the rest of Europe. It would be nice to hear other comments.

    Ciao

  2. I think these are right. Women want men with intelligence and status. You can signal these in different ways, but the best are probably clever words, confidence, and good friends. And because everyone is different, you probably will not find a perfect match on the first, second, or even hundredth try. So just keep try. The more you try, the better you get each time. In some ways, men are making themselves less attractive to potential future partners by staying with one girl. Personally I’ve learned the most from my mistakes.

    To Riccardo’s point, I think choosing a good location is very important as well. Women have to be careful when they choose a man, because before birth control made this less important, they risked getting pregnant through casual sex. So women want commitment. And they need information to make this judgment, so having something in common and sharing time with a potential partner increasing a man’s chances. So friends of friends, parties, shared vacation activities, etc. makes you a safer bet. This is true here in America as much as it is in Europe. True, America is more casual, but MOST men will still need to carefully select a time and location wherever they find the girl.

  3. Riccardo – Most definitely location matters, but I believe that women even in Sweden are open to men if their approach is right. Like Tony pointed out, women want men with intelligence and status and can be confident in their approach.

    If a man approached me on the street and acted creepy or uncertain of himself, I wouldn’t care about him. But if the man had manners and brains, then I would stop to listen to him.

  4. I found The Game pretty fascinating too, and it must have been so interesting to see their training night out! I think anything taken to extremes is a bad thing, but I definitely agree that a lot of nice guys could use the pointers in the book.

  5. I’m not a womaniser or heartbreaker, but two general consideration are applicable:
    Firstly, believe in yourself, in your physical aspect, your hobbies (it does not mean that you will be able to pick up the most beautiful girl of the world)
    Secondly, be kind and at the first approach bear in mind that you want to know another person, possibly a friend that might turn into your girls.

    c u

  6. How about some tips for the ladies? Us guys are held to pretty high standards (From this article alone: Accept Rejection, Keep Trying, be Confident, Witty and Well Traveled etc etc) but obviously, it takes two to make a couple.

  7. Great article!
    I like the ten commandments and how you describe them. Cerainly a great place for anyone to start from. :)

  8. HMM..There’s a couple of posts here saying “what about tips for the women?” Ok,i’ll help from a man’s point of view.
    This is the “shallow mans” version,meaning it’s based on girls who are averagely pretty and upwards who have 2 eyes a full set of teeth,2(nice)tits,2 (nice)legs and a cute ass!
    I’ll base it on the tips above too.

    1/ BE GORGEOUS!..rejection will never be a problem!

    2/ DON’T expect to get every guy – Some are gay,totally in love already,or terrified of you!

    3/ BE CONFIDENT – Guys adore confident women.Chat up lines like “hey,fancy a shag?” or “I have a house,some nice wine and an industrial size bottle of babyoil..wanna shag?” tend to work well on most men and they’ll appreciate you for the “green light”!

    4/ HAVE A PERSONALITY – We dealt with this in answer 1.

    5/ DON’T BE DRUNK – This is true.There’s nothing worse than a hottie who’s drunk.The result will be the same,you’ll get laid,but chances are it’ll be by him,his friends and a passing busload of football supporters,and you’ll end up on youtube with 18 million hits!

    6/ HAVE A GOOD WINGMAN – Always a good idea.If she’s as hot as you are then the option of bringing her into play for a threesome if the guy is stubborn works twice as good! Also good if you’ve terrified him and he feels safer bringing a friend!

    7/ TRY TRY TRY AGAIN – 9 times out of 10 you’ll never have to go past the first “try”! But if he’s stood with his girlfriend/wife then the other 2 may have to come into effect.
    Be confident! She wants you too! Life’s an adventure! Fondle her while chatting him up and he’s yours!

    8/ TRAVEL – If you feel the urge i guess.Men are shallow bastards everywhere,so why bother?

    9/ POOR POSTURE WILL KILL YOU – Debateable where women are concerned.Poor posture can enhance a guys view of your cleavage,legs and or ass.Never a bad thing!

    10/ PICK UP LINES SHOULD NOT BE LAME – Never use those tired lines like “Hi,i have degrees in home economics,history and political science..wanna shag?” They make guys think of the after sex conversation,and you’ll lose them!
    Stick with the simple “Ok..you,you,you anddddd ummmmm..you…my place NOW!Lets go!” and you can’t go wrong!

    So there ya go,the hotties guide to picking up men,hope it helps!
    Remember – You’re hot! Guys want you,girls want you,everyone wants you! Be confident,never look or seem aloof and unaproachable.Always dress to kill,and it’s impossible to go wrong! Lycka till ladies! :)

    (If you’re looking for a steady boyfriend,true love,or don’t want your number on the wall of every public toilet in Sweden?…then ignore this!)

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