Meet a Beautiful Blonde Swedish Girl? Dating Swedish Women isn’t Easy

21 Aug
2009

Swedish girls are everything what you fantasize about. They are tall, beautiful, blonde (although artificially blond dyed hair), busty, athletic, and strong. These viking women are the enigma wrapped in a conundrum because the men still haven’t figured them out.

If dating Swedish men was confusing enough, then dating Swedish women must be more so. I’m a girl, an American-Indian girl, and therefore am not Swedish. But I have a few Swedish girlfriends and they all have opinions of their fellow male counterparts. Some comments are downright ballsy. Swedish guys have done a good job of losing their balls over the years, part thanks to feminism, part thanks to super tight jeans that served as self castrating devices.
Swedish Girls
First off, if you are man, Swedish, French, American, British, you have to learn how to smooch and booze with those hot Swedish women. A lot of booze, it helps.  Second, it seems that foreign men in Sweden have an advantage over the Swedish men.  Be happy and use it wisely.

Here’s what Swedish women think of Swedish men:

  • Kinda shy – the men just watch you and wait forever before they will come speak to you.
  • Difficult to figure out
  • Snåla – a bit greedy and stingy, swedish men don’t invite girls out much
  • Too dependent on alcohol – the boys drink to get drunk, and it’s very gross. If swedish men learned to drink for pleasure and not got wasted, it would be easier to have a conversation and think they are sexy. In Southern Europe, people drink wine, beer, alcohol with class. Up in Scandinavia, people drink like the end of the world is coming. Plus, drinking a glass of wine on a Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday is akin to alcoholism, yet it’s okay to get wasted drunk from Thursday to Saturday. Where’s the moderation?
  • No alcohol = no conversation, the Swedish boys have no ability to communicate without the clutch of alcohol
  • Too emotionally distant and far away

What Swedish women LIKE/ WANT Swedish men to do:

  • Be courteous – maybe open doors, pull out chairs, a little bit of chivalry is good
  • If you invite someone for dinner, then you could at least pay for it!
  • Buy a gift to show your affection; it’s nice to receive presents
  • Have some balls and guts and speak to me! “Hi, what’s up” does not count.  We want  to talk about real stuff, not just the weather.
  • Stop counting every krona spent at a meal, it’s embarrassing to decide who got what drink, what side dish, etc.  Can’t we just split the bill like normal people?
  • Be a man and stand up for what you want

After reading all these comments you must think, “damn, how do Swedish men and women mate and have lots of babies?”  I wonder that too, and I’ll put the blame on the dark swedish winter and the bright swedish summer.  You also must think that Swedish women hate their fellow men.  It’s part true, more Swedish women are interested in foreign men than they are in other Swedes.  Boredom, lack of balls, and overall disappointment are contributing factors.

What can you learn from this?  Like I said, if you are male and not Swedish, you already have a leading position.  If you have the ability to speak to girls without being a pussy and make good conversation, again, major brownie posts.  And finally, if you have some gentlemanly qualities,  the beautiful blond Swedish girls will be all over you.

As my friend put it:  Swedish blond bombshells may be tough and viking-like on the outside, but they are still soft, delicate women on the inside.  A Swedish woman deserves to be treated as such.

PS - I’m well aware that this post constitutes a generalization. Please don’t comment that I’m stereotyping and stereotyping sucks, wah wah wah. Everyone generalizes; get over it. Your comment will not be approved.

Please however comment on something more constructive. Perhaps why Swedish women have a reputation of being blond/beautiful or why the negative reputation of being “sluts.” Or your experience dating a Swedish girl or being a Swedish girl and dating.

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287 Responses to Meet a Beautiful Blonde Swedish Girl? Dating Swedish Women isn’t Easy

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Michael

August 21st, 2009 at 14:51

thx so much i really needed to hear this , Sweden listen to me i am back , i’m gonna be myself again, Michael’s coming, stretch your arms for me

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Sapphire

August 21st, 2009 at 15:37

@Michael – Do it! Go out and find those Swedish girls. Keep us posted on your adventures.

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Smek this!

August 21st, 2009 at 16:51

In a swimming hall’s shower room, Swedes act like peacocks. Showing their balls and everything. Such a shame that they can’t transfer that into their presence with women, LOL!

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Nikolina

August 21st, 2009 at 22:12

Wow, you’re full of bull#€**.

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marc

August 22nd, 2009 at 11:40

swedish girls are so prettyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

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Michael

August 22nd, 2009 at 14:41

now seriously, why some people are so obsessed about swede girls i’d never figure out, i mean to me it’s just absurd to be spending my time on how to get a cute girl .if you aren’t looking for a long term relationship though, that’s quite fine otherwise to get a relationship worked beauty is not enough.
she’s gorgeous ,but what else she got? does she have sense of humor or is she an uderstanding person or only cares about herself and…
so just take it easy. are you really gonna live your life like this?

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Emma

August 23rd, 2009 at 16:54

Well spoken Sapphire, but I think there’s one way to even top the foreign man. “How?” I hear you ask. By finding a Swedish man who’s spent a lot of time abroad, thus learning about chivalry and grown a pair of balls. These men are simply as good as they get!
To begin with it’s awesome to be involved with someone foreign, but you know what? Down the line it just gets annoying and difficult, regardless of country they’re from. Nah, my advice is to find a “världsvan” Swedish bloke.

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Sapphire

August 23rd, 2009 at 21:27

@smek – ahahahaha. and for the wanker jokes, the swedes are terrified of sharing feelings. seems like middle school everyday, doesn’t it?

@michael – because people love blonds. and they go crazy when they see blond girls and of course swedes are more than willing to play into that.

@Emma – You’re totally right! That’s why to find a Swede, don’t look in Sweden. Swedes who lived abroad are centered and have balls.

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Giorgio

August 26th, 2009 at 15:15

Hello sapphire!

Why dont you take a look at the first post on my blog http://www.giorgiotales.blogspot.com/ ?

I have been working two weeks on that article going around Stockholm and I can tell you that I agree with you on many things but I think there’s somethimg tou are missing…

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jo

August 26th, 2009 at 18:05

That makes me a lucky lady then, my swede is very well-travelled!

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Daniel

September 17th, 2009 at 15:24

HAHAHA!??! Whats wrong with you guys? Im from sweden and Wtf! You can’t write what swedish girls like and how they are like. They are people like everybody else? They are induvidiuals! DAMN! And not all swedish girls look like that, HAHA! It’s few that do. When I wen’t to Canada and the United States i saw alot of far more beatufiul girls there then our pale white blond girls… boooring!

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Danny

September 20th, 2009 at 02:10

I married one over 10 years ago and I’ll love her till I die. 6′ Blonde hair and blue eyes. Great legs. Sweet personality. Best of all, she loves Jesus and we’ll see each other in Heaven when we die.

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David Brace

November 4th, 2009 at 23:21

I want to meet young Swedish women who love American men!

Thanks, David

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Sapphire

November 6th, 2009 at 02:04

David – Join a Scandinavian club, you’ll definitely meet some beautiful girls.

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peter

November 13th, 2009 at 09:58

I can’t imagine that i can’t find my self aswedish girl,here am i looking for one and the only one

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Anderson

November 23rd, 2009 at 22:37

Nice list of dos and donts there…would be helpful for my college years in Sweden ;)
Discrete dating site for those married , or in a relationship,
and looking for discreet married dating.
marriedandlooking.co.uk

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dee

November 25th, 2009 at 22:03

so freaking accureate!!!!! good job!d

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Sapphire

November 27th, 2009 at 14:07

Anderson – Isn’t it kinda weird to have a site for married people looking for people … seems a bit unethical.

dee – glad to help out.

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Swedish girl

November 27th, 2009 at 22:15

I’m looking for a nice American man to hook up with and hopefully have a future with. I find it soo hard to find some serious guys out there. I am Swedish and people find me beautiful and smart, but what do I do wrong>>

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Michael

January 22nd, 2010 at 11:24

Hi Swedish girl, I am an Aussie bloke and I love Swedish women. I am nice to open doors for them and be courteous but also know what I want and don’t have any problems telling you what it is. So what do you think? Would you like to come down to Australia and I can look after you and take you to dinner? Email me back and let me know. Thanks. All the best. Michael.

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leo

January 31st, 2010 at 09:23

Hey Swedish girl, I am an American male currently residing in Göteborg..moved here 6 years ago to be with what i thought at that time, a possible future parner. We were together for about 5 yrs, but things just wasn’t working out between us. Must be a culture thing.. I was born and raised in Hawaii, Oahu to be exact with a filipino-american background. I have been single now for almost a year and I found that finding that right Swedish tje to be with can be very difficult. I have dated a few through those online dating agencies they have here in Sweden, but almost all of them seem to be the complete opposite of me..by this I mean, it’s not fun to be with someone who totally are not into the things you are into.. e-mail me when you get a chance o HA DET!!
Leo i göteborg

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Daniel

February 3rd, 2010 at 18:49

I am a 6’2″, 200 lb, blonde haired, blue eyed American. I honestly am attracted to other blondes, but it seems they are always in relationships. I am at a disadvantage because there are so few on the east coast. I play rugby in CT and I’m healthy, but I will admit I too must listen more to this guys advice.

I don’t go up and talk to woman I think is the most beautiful, which I admit is cowardly. I’m great around guys but horrible around girls. Honestly the ones I knew who are great with girls either don’t revere them as much as I do (most likely my mistake) thus aren’t afraid or are gay/metrosexual and aren’t really interested in that way. It’s funny because once I do I have a conversation I have a great time.

I just think a man who thinks too much and doesn’t just do what he wants is doomed in dating ( WARNING This does not bode as well in business or in most other decision making positions, you won’t have a job and or be in debt). Ever been to a cold pool? You dip your toe and it’s horrible, easing in is an even experience. So jump right in my Swedish brothers, take a lesson from the impulsive. You come from a long line of great thinkers, lovers and (what made it all possible) warriors. Count when you need to count, think when you need to think fight when you need to fight (before you lose your chance forever). Fight for your ladies and they will love you for it.

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Josefine

February 11th, 2010 at 15:00

You forgot one thing; if there’s anything a Swedish girl wants in a man, then its good looks. That’s why they usually settle with Swedish guys. Foreigners aren’t as attractive as Swedes (mostly) and we’re a shallow people.

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tom samuelsson

February 11th, 2010 at 22:37

Hahaha, I’m a swedish guy and I laughed SO hard when I read this :D
It’s a pity that most of it is true though :P especially the part about swedes drinking too much

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Nick

February 12th, 2010 at 21:38

This is kind of a chicken and egg argument. As a Canadian, I found Swedish women to be very aloof, unless they were drunk. In that case, they were content to be just another piece of ass. Amazing transition. And despite their air of superiority, most Swedish women will settle for pretty much anyone as a boyfriend. No self-respect at all. So, Swedish women… ‘Looks’ thumbs up! ‘EVERYTHING else’ thumbs down!

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Yes, Swedish Girls are Beautiful

February 13th, 2010 at 10:50

[…] readers out there, this should inspire you on how to find a Swedish women and also how to pick up girls. Or at the very least, enjoy the […]

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Sapphire

February 13th, 2010 at 13:33

Josefine – You’re right. I’ll add the good looks parts in.

Tom – I appreciate that you as a Swedish guy admit this is close to the truth. Thanks for writing about it on your blog too!

Nick – I have heard that complaint as well and now I’m starting to wonder if people are running into really young beautiful swedish girls. Because I can’t tell the age gap for many girls and they may be younger than they look, hence the low-settle.

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Björn

February 19th, 2010 at 06:09

I must say one thing though, being a foreigner in almost any country makes you popular with the girls. It must be the whole exotic thing or something but being from another country seems to do half the work for you. I dont see how any guy traveling to sweden havent already noticed this to be honest hehe.

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Anton

February 21st, 2010 at 02:10

I´m not very fond of the fact that you as an american women think you can come in here and rant about what you “know” swedish women want and how worthless and unmanly swedish men are. In the end it means you´re calling ME a little bitch and i can´t tolerate that. So come here and say that to my face you fat, fundamentalist, piece of sart american. (see stereotyping is stupid.

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Sapphire

February 21st, 2010 at 09:58

Björn, yes I agree, we all love exotic.

Anton- If you would like to insult people and call them names, go elsewhere. We do not need your shatty attitude here.

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Anton

February 22nd, 2010 at 01:48

I want to apologize to you Sapphire for being rude, i read some of your other posts and came to the conclusion that you were not as bad as i first thought. I just got angry and had to blow off steam.

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Latina girl

February 28th, 2010 at 23:41

@Björn

Very interesting information here. I can’t say anything about swedish girls because I don’t know any. But the exotic factor that you mention is true. In my country I’m just average and a lot of guys here love blond girls. But in other places (even other latin countries as well) I get hit on. But that happens more with white guys.

I’ve never asked anyone this question because it’s quite dumb but, what is it? What makes “white” guys (no intention to look racist here) like latin women? I’m not saying it is a general thing, because I realize many don’t like latin features and vice-versa (n my case, my skin is not as dark as some wouldd expect but my hair is). But there seems to be a “fascination” for latin women, at least that’s what I’ve seen from quite a number of white men. Is it the looks? the culture? the language? the dancing? the fact that we are a little more… “submissive” lol?

This question is also open to others too =)

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Nicu

March 3rd, 2010 at 15:55

Suck me!!!.I like you all

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Björn

March 3rd, 2010 at 21:35

@Latina girl

Most likely that it is a mix of everything you mentioned. For me,I would say that I like the tanned skin and the dark hair. And I find it very pleasant to watch a latin woman dance=p. Which reminds me, I should take some salsa classes hehe. I wouldt be surprised if alot of guys find the language/accent very sensual aswell. Id say culture is a given since it will come along with the woman.

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Latina girl

March 5th, 2010 at 06:51

@Björn

Ok, thanks for your comment. It’s probably the same reason of why we find scandinavian guys attractive as well, a mix of things such as looks, coyness, accent, politeness, straihgt forwardness, literacy, good humor, etc.

P.S. Yeah, you should definitely take some salsa classes, when a man can (or at least tries to) dance… =P

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Björn

March 9th, 2010 at 01:42

@ Latina girl

“P.S. Yeah, you should definitely take some salsa classes, when a man can (or at least tries to) dance… =P”

Yeah it seems like alot of fun, had this latina friend who always said that I should learn but she never wanted to show me, she always said that her boyfriend will teach me, but I wouldt feel comfortable in a dance like salsa with another man lol. So I never learned.

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Latina girl

March 12th, 2010 at 04:14

@Björn

Yeah, I agree, it is pretty uncomfortable. Maybe she just wanted to respect her boyfriend as some men could get jealous if they see their girl teaching another guy how to dance. But if you still want to learn, I’ve found some good dancing classes on youtube, just type “how to dance salsa”. And the good thing is that if you are kind of shy of looking like a fool, this is a good way to learn. And also you can repeat it over and over until you get it!

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Edra Gretz

March 14th, 2010 at 05:31

Lots of Fantastic information in your blogpost, I bookmarked your blog post so I can visit again in the near future, Cheers

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Björn

March 17th, 2010 at 02:32

@ Latina girl

There are some salsa places in stockholm that Ive been to, there are mostly hispanic people there, in fact, so many that everytime Ive been there that everyone just assume that I speak spanish. My first idea was to just go there and ask a girl to ask me to teach me lol. I always figured that the best way to learn something is to just do it. But everyone at those places are just there to dance salsa and are great at it. So I kinnda feel out of place. How would you as a latina girl react if someone asked you to teach them to dance in a salsa club?

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Latina girl

March 17th, 2010 at 04:00

@Björn
Honestly that is the best way to do it. I would be happy if the guy asked me because it is not in our culture to make the first move whether to be someone’s friend or more. And she would probably feel great because if she lives in Sweden she’s probably struggling with the language and might feel frustrated at times, so being able to teach something that she likes and is good at will have a good positive reaction in her. Plus we love it when we see a guy making an effort at dancing =)
If she doesn’t know swedsih you can say: Hola, me podrías enseñar a bailar?

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Björn

March 17th, 2010 at 04:22

@ Latina girl

That sounds very good, Im not shy to ask but I dont want to appear like a hopeless case either. I dont want to make it look like Im trying to pick up the girl however, Im already have someone that I am interessting in. So if I asked a latin girl to teach me how to dance salsa, would she see it as a way to pick her up?, or just as something fun?. Is there a way to tell her in spanish in a nice way to say that I just want to be friends with her?. And I will memorize that spanish line you gave me. Currently I only know how to order beer in spanish =P.

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Sapphire

March 21st, 2010 at 20:19

Björn, out of curiosity, are you at all attracted to this Spanish girl? If not at all, then do mention that you would love her to teach you salsa but you’re not doing it to hit on her.

Then again, if she thinks you’re good looking, she’ll interpret it in the opposite way and over-analyze. Because, Latin girls, American girls, Swedish girls ALL love to think too much.

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Latina girl

March 23rd, 2010 at 04:42

@Björn
I have to agree with Sapphire about girls over-analyzing everything. Some would see it as something fun and others as something more. But with your attitude and words you can let her know that you are not interested in her that way. After you say the first line you can say “solo como amigos, si?” and then you smile friendly (not flirty hehe) If it is a group of girls then you can extend the invitation to all of them by saying “hola, me PODRÍAN enseñar a bailar?” instead of “podrías”. There is a big posibility that at least one will volunteer and then you say the second line. That way she won’t be thinking: “oh, he asked ME, that’s got to mean something” but “poor guy, he seems nice, let’s help him”. I know, the “poor guy” thing doesn’t sound so good sometimes but that’s what they will think, however they will be sympathetic and friendly.

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Latina girl

March 23rd, 2010 at 04:49

@Björn
P.S. Why doesn’t it surprise me? “Currently I only know how to order beer in spanish =P” haha =) Actually that is a phrase people should memorize in every language ;)

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Stephen

March 23rd, 2010 at 16:16

i have read your post and think its very interesting. I am Irish and have a swedish Girlfriend. i think the fat that i have that so called ‘irish charm’ really helped! but having been in sweden a few times, i notice the swedish guys, in general, are really nice and down to earth! unlike UK guys. i dont see any agression or fights and everyone seems chilled out!i dont know why swedish women love foreign guys, its true in part, but swedish guys are noce too. i do know quite a few

stephen

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abc

March 24th, 2010 at 10:59

“Swedish women are interested in foreign men than they are in other Swedes”

How fu***** disgusting. Also the “no balls part”. F*ing pathetic. Makes me rage. They want feminism, they don’t want men-men, that’s opressive, oh noo, they want to be like men, have all the privileges, they want to be f”’ing bitches, but still want guys to pull out the chair for them?

Well f— you.

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Anton

March 27th, 2010 at 03:22

Yeah I agree with you abc, the general opinion among the politic elite and feminists are that swedish men who act like men are macho pigs that probably beat their wifes and would rape any girl if given the opportunity. On the other hand the same women complain about swedish men being feminine (including or dear sapphire) and therefore choose to date middleastern or african men.I am one of many swedish men who choose to stay a man and therefore stereotyped from both sides,as a macho pig and and a wimp. Very frustrating

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Mark

April 8th, 2010 at 05:13

Hi I live in New York and would love to meet a Swedish woman. Any ideas how I can do this? Are there any Swedish dating services or sites that you can tell me about? Thanks.
Mark

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Mark

April 8th, 2010 at 05:18

Well why wait, here is my address? If there are any beautiful Swedish girls out there that would like to meet a charming, polite, educated, bold and exciting American please email me at newyorkfashiondesigner@yahoo.com
Cheers, Mark.

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Swedish S

April 27th, 2010 at 22:13

Seriously, I read your blog and think you have some good points but this is just not true.
I am as swedish as we get and I do not want my guys to buy me things and pay for dinner. That makes me feel like I owe them something, which is very uncomfortable if you try to date someone. Yes I do enjoy getting a beer payd for now and again, but the next round he better let me pay.
And yes, some chivlary is nice but not too much, if a man try to pull out my chair it makes me laugh, do hold the door up, but next time when I walk thrpugh the door first, let me hold it up to him. It’s all about equality, even in the little things. If the guy pays everyr bill and open all the doors he will make me feel like he looks down on me. As far as the alcohol coles I agree it’s a pity swedish guys need to be drunk to hit on people, (for the most part) but to be honest, it goes for us swedish girls aswell, and probably boils down to the fact that we mostly interract with others out at clubs and bars.

This was a bad list, you could have done something much better!

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Sapphire

April 30th, 2010 at 13:47

@Swedish S – Appreciate your honestly. I spoke to as many Swedish girls (girlfriends) that I could find and ask them about dating in Sweden. Most agreed with this list though of course, this does not apply to everyone.

What I’m really curious though, is why everything has to be so equal in Sweden? Why is being equal on even the little things matter so much?

And also, what do you want Swedish men to do that they’re not doing when you meet them at bars/clubs/parties??

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Björn

May 1st, 2010 at 06:34

@ Swedish S

I agree, most girls here do get almost angry if you treat them as if they are a lesser being, with that I mean paying for everything, holding up doors even if its not needed, pulling out chairs etc. To me as a swedish guy it almost feels like doing all that, it means that one would think that women are not capable of doing that themselves.

@ Sapphire

Speaking as a guy, I do think swedish women want everything to be equal, I mean what womwn wouldt want it?. But I think women here appreciate it more if you treat them to things that really matter, like maybe taking them to a trip to some tropical island on your treat. A swedish woman could afford going on her own, but if her man buys the whole trip himself it really means that he wants to spend a very romantic vacation with her and only her. I beleive that is something that swedish women appreciate a lot more than holding up some door as if she was 95 years old and could not do it on her own.

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Moonlight

May 1st, 2010 at 17:24

Hmmmm… Well, I’m not swedish, but I like to be equal with my man in the cases mentioned as well, though maybe independent would be a better word for it. Agree with Swedish S – if a guy wants to pay for dinner, drinks or similar, it does feel like I owe him something and start to wonder what does he want in return. The only exception would be if we’d agree that he pays this time and I’ll pay the next time.

However, I would expect my man to be manly enough to help me carry some of my shopping if I’m struggling and so on and I’d like him to be able to stand up not only for himself, but for me as well. After all I do want protection – emotional as well as physical, cause behind my “can-do-it-all-myself” appearance there’s still a delicate woman, we all need some reassurance from time to time.

With my previous relationship it was all other way round though – I had to “wear the trousers” in the old-fashioned way – pay the rent, all the bills, dining out and “lending” him money which I never saw back and even assembling all pieces of furniture which I bought and dragged back home by myself from ikea or argos from about 10 miles away… If there was a problem in the household – it was quickly becoming solely my problem. So, – never again:))) if it will be anything but equal in all departments with any guy in the future – a guy will be as good as dumped for all I’m concerned.

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Cooldudesweden

May 1st, 2010 at 22:36

Hi,
I am not swedish, however I am in sweden.
Looking for a date with swedish female is a dream for me, since I am brown in color….this is not my perception, but others feel so.

I just want to tell that for above topic, females do expect something from their man and which is OK as per me. Holding shopping bags, paying some bills, protecting the female is man’s job and there should not be question of equality in it. Has any female ever asked to carry a baby in man’s body for 9 month….
sorry guys, i am a male too, however I agree to Moonlight.

Any comments welcome and also any female for date in stockholm is welcome. I stay near Central stockholm.

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Latina girl

May 6th, 2010 at 22:19

Wow wow wow!! This is all a little strange for me! Coming from a different culture I can’t really understand this equality thing. To me, that’s not the definition of equality. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I do think that we are all human beens that deserve love and respect and no gender is more important than the other in any sense. But I realize that men and women are not the same. If I thought that, I would be a lesbian. It is the differences between us what makes me love men. Female friends… I have plenty. So I’m not looking for a man who acts like a girl. Sure we all can pretty much do the same things (except carrying babies hehe). But I believe that men are more capable for certain tasks and women for other tasks. We are a good match, a compliment of each other. In my mind it by no means signifies that there’s a better gender. And in my “town” all my male friends pay for the stuff. Like, if a group of us goes to have dinner, the guys pay for the bill. They would consider themselves jerks if they didn’t. As a woman, I like when men do that unless I know they’re having a hard time making a living. As a rule, I always offer to pay for myself, but they sometimes even get offended for not being considered real gentlemen.
Equality to me means that no one is better than the other. That I get the love and respect I deserve and they get the same from me. We ARE different. I don’t think we should strive to be the same. In my opinion, it’s a natural thing for a man to want to protect a girl and for a woman to be protected. I think it’s the bad treatment from some men what made women want to “fight” against that instinct, as under those circumstances it was seen as something negative.
Anyways, that’s just my personal opinion. However I’m openminded with my swedish friend and DO NOT expect him to pay for things because I know he IS a gentleman in many other aspects. He is just fine the way he is and culture shouldn’t be an obstacle.

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T

May 7th, 2010 at 03:58

As an American woman who has a lot of Swedish male friends–and spent some time over there–I really love the fact that things like the money situation in a date setting are seen that way. I never did get why one person (namely the man) is always expected to fork out the cash. If I have it on me, cool beans. If I don’t and he does–fine, but I’ll feel more comfortable covering it next time.

Some of the things I don’t get as much I’m at least learning to expect/understand based off the interactions with my friends. I’d say the silence thing is still what I’m getting used to.

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Kirran

May 9th, 2010 at 03:15

You guys go way to deep into th subject. I was just thinking about going to sweden to see if the women are still women. Not like America, where all the women are pretty much men. I’m tired of dating girls with smug f’ing attitudes. American women have nothing to offer besides their coochi but the worst by far are the Korean women. Don’t ever date one! *WOMEN* don’t ever forget that a guy does not want to be business partners with you. A man wants a relationship that’s normal! Try to revert back to the 1940s or 50s. what did women do? Cook, Clean and take care of the children. Some woman with a d*** had to go and screw that up for the rest of us. Thanks a lot America now I have to go overseas to try and find a suitable wife!

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martin

May 9th, 2010 at 18:27

hi everybody,im guy who likes blondes,welljust x the outside,ighuees,ihad meet many swedish n ithink they r not friendly open people ,as somewere i had read ,ibeen travel lot n everywere they just are open with another sweedish people,they r sure that they r best in the world n they r more than anybody,they r to proud to be swedish ,is to much,that this just make me take swedish to the bed n dont think morte than this,ill never take a swedish seriuosly.if u really know sewedish people as i do u ll figure out.

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Moonlight

May 9th, 2010 at 21:08

@Kirran

cook, clean and take care of the children – is that what you think a woman should do????:))) Sit at home and listen to some “husband” moaning that I spent too much money on food/clothes/etc, when I can go and earn my own money and spend it on whatever I like???? And why, in your opinion, should a man be obliged with supporting the whole family? How many men are there on the whole planet who would earn enough to support the whole family? You’re a bit behind with times, I think:)))

“A man wants a relationship that’s normal!” – Whats your definition of “normal”?

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Princess

May 9th, 2010 at 21:37

@Kirran

Please, please don’t come to the UK cos we’ve got enough idiotic men and don’t need another. Has the feminist movement completely passed you by??! Are you a caveman in disguise? Perhaps the reason you’ve not got a wife is your rather backward attitude to the fairer sex. A partner should be your equal not your subordinate.

@moonlight
agree totally – go girlfriend!

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T

May 9th, 2010 at 23:25

@Kirran

Heck, why are you even looking at Sweden then? Because that sure as heck doesn’t describe a Swedish female…

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Björn

May 10th, 2010 at 10:23

@Kirran

You are delusional. A woman is not a substitute bed and a personal servant/chef with a built in kindergarten.

@Martin

No real idea what your on about to be honest. The way you type and how you talk about that you will only sleep with swedish women and never think of them again suggests that you are very immature. Maybe that is your problem.

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Carlson

May 11th, 2010 at 20:55

Now….
Personally, I think Swedes have the right idea. “Feminism” in america is complete utter nonsense. They don’t want to be equals.. in America (almost) every woman wants to be a goddess and doted on hand and foot. You won’t get a date if you aren’t paying for them. It is almost required. (There are always a few exceptions… but this is from quite a few years of partying, and dating experience here) If a woman wants to be equal.. then they should be equal… in ALL aspects. Now… that doesn’t have to take away gentleman things. Not all gentlemen type things have to be about equality. I’m slightly frustrated lately, as All my life I’ve been trying to change myself to fit the “all american guy”… when all I have to do, is move to Sweden! Chivalry isn’t about making someone less then you, it is showing appreciation for the company of people you enjoy being around. To me at least.

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Latina girl

May 12th, 2010 at 00:28

@Björn
Hey! how do you do?
I have a question for you. If you were in Venezuela, adapting to the culture and all of that… what would you be looking for in a woman? Someone that is completely exotic, very latin in culture and that speaks limited english, someone that looks a little exotic according to where you come from but not as much, openminded with culture and speaks fluent english, or someone that is closer to your culture like blonde, and native english speaker??

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Princess

May 12th, 2010 at 20:03

@Bjorn

I find your last comments eminently sensible – hurrah Sir!

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Björn

May 18th, 2010 at 15:37

@Latina girl

Heya! I cant complain, how about you? =)

Thats easy, I would definatly go for the latin woman that is open minded with culture and fluent in english.

Because I have a thing for latin women so less exotic or not does not bother me in the least. The major reasons for my choice is that she is open minded about culture and speaks english well. It makes it so much easier to get to know her and understand her. Without that it would be hard to aim for a serious and long lasting relationship.

@Princess

Thanks=). Cant beleive that some people still think of women like that or even want women to be like that. To me, that line of thought is like considering women to be cattle or something. Pretty much the same idiocy as racism.

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Princess

May 18th, 2010 at 20:08

@Bjorn

Hmm yes and have you noticed @Kirran’s gone a little quiet…

Stupidity I think is the worst thing in the world but it’s rampant! No cure at all…the cursse of humanity.

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Latina girl

May 19th, 2010 at 01:26

@Bjorn
=))))
Ok, that makes me feel better. Sometimes I think I have the feeling that I am too latina for some and not exotic enough for others, so I feel like I can’t please anyone. But I’ve always thought that one should be real, and if that’s what I am, well… that’s what i am!
Thanks for your time. I always count on you and your blunt answers =)

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James Coil

May 19th, 2010 at 23:23

good article, just moved to stockholm from london and loving it! even better now i have discovered this website – now i have “inside info”. keep up the good work

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Björn

May 20th, 2010 at 23:54

@Latina girl

Happy to be here for you =D

I just have 2 questions. First of all. Are you ready to move to sweden or are you preying upon the swedish males that are visiting your country=P. Are you ready to move abroad if you find the ONE guy?. If you are ready to move abroad then things might be easier if you are hellbent on meeting a swedish guy. Because otherwise you would have to find someone online that is willing to move to venezuela, it is a big step for either of you.

If you are ready to move to sweden then I recomend this dating site http://www.motesplatsen.se it is a serious dating site and I hear from my work mates that everyone of their friends that have used it has found someone. Not sure if it has an english section but If necessery, I can help with translation =)

Question 2! From what you have learned about swedish males so far, what would be the biggest mistake for a swedish guy to make when going for a latin woman?.

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Latina girl

May 21st, 2010 at 19:04

@Björn

Answer 1: I do not have plans to move abroad for now. I’m just trying to figure out the swedish guys over here. For some reason i think that swedish guys are worth the effort. If I find THE ONE I would absolutely move if necessary. I’m very determined. I’m not interested in meeting guys online. Face to face is complicated enough =) But thank you for offering your help!

Answer 2: That’s a good question. i would say that the biggest mistake for a swedish man when going for a latin woman is not making clear movements. It confuses us. We don’t know if they are into us or not. A big mistake is also expecting the woman to take the initiative. Unless she is openminded and cares enough for the guy, she won’t do it. Or she might do it for a while, but if things are progressing very slow and there’s no big response from the guy, she will move on. And not being informed of what a latin “gentleman” is could be a mistake. I know for a fact that Swedish guys are very polite, but a latin man shows politeness in different ways. So, the girl might think that swedish politeness is actually rudeness. Just some information about it would do it. Lack of chivalry is basically the mistake. It’s not exactly the things swedish men do, but the things they DON’T do.

Sorry if I couldn’t come up with only one big mistake. But my only intention is to help =)

Now that we are talking about mistakes, the obvious question from me is the same: From what you have learned about latin women so far, what would be the biggest mistake for a latin woman to make when going for a swedish man?

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Swedish Girls sucks

May 22nd, 2010 at 01:40

I am a Swedish guy, and i’ve dated alot of Swedish girls.
I don’t behave like the ordinary Swedish guy at all.
And im so sick and tired of their feminism attitude, guys don’t date a Swedish girl, they’re mostly terrible in bed and want to be threated as a princess all the time.
Im currently dating girls from Russia, and former soviet countries.
Belive me, i’ve done it all. I wouldn’t trade 1 Russian girl for 10 Swedish ones. If you dont belive me, Welcome and get bored.
I don’t give a f*** about these shallow girls anymore.
You wonder why we have 55 % divorce rate in Sweden?
Just google it.

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Björn

May 22nd, 2010 at 23:56

@latina girl

I fully understand your point and your draw to swedish males. It is the same for me. I really love latin women for example. Curves at the right places and all that. Not to mention those big brown eyes and that firm but reasonable attidude towards men, and that dark hair. So even if its based on different things, I can really understand =D. I hope you find your guy and even if he is shy about certain things, I can only recomend that you should not be. Lol =))

About latin women, how do I show that I am interssted in a serious way?. As in Im not looking for a one night stand but something serious. Is there some way that is more or less a standard way to show it throughout south america and southern europe?. I am very blunt, even by swedish standards, what kind of bluntness would a latin girl expect? and how much would be too much?.

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Latina girl

May 24th, 2010 at 01:37

@Björn
Well, since I don’t fully know what the swedish dating procedure is, all i can do is explain what the latin one is more or less. Latin America is quite big and some rules probably don’t apply in every country. But this is the general idea of dating:
1) A latin woman meets a guy. He is charming, funny and makes her feel at ease. They talk.
2) Depending on the circumstances he might ask for her phone number right before they say good bye. They shake hands and kiss on the chick to say good bye.
3) After a few days, no more than a week he calls her. SMS are ok too. It’s just to let her know that he still remembers her and to make sure she doesn’t forget him either.
4) He calls or SMS her again to arrange to meet. It could be a group date or just the 2 of them, depending on her and his personality. It’s preferable something casual to break the ice. Coffee or outdoors is good.
5) He arrives on time at the place or he might arrange to pick her up. Sadly but surely she will either be a little late or not be ready yet when being picked up. That’s ok. It means she spent time grooming and enhancing her beauty for him, although her appearence might look the same for the guy =D
6) He treats her like a lady, opening the door for her, pulling the chair, etc. Random compliments are very good. They talk about everything and HE pays for the girl. Maybe they talk about when or where to meet up again.
7) If the guy takes her home, even though he might not have picked her up means extra point for him =)
8) Depending on the particular guy and girl, they get that going for a little while (calling, e-mailing, SMS ing and going out) It is to develop an attachment and a friendship before moving forward. Kisses on the chick are still going.
9) Up to this point they are NOT boyfriend and girlfriend yet. When he feels that she is ready, he will ask: Would you like to be my girlfriend? She might immediately say yes or she could ask for a few days to think about it. In most cases it doesn’t mean that she will say no. She had already thought about that way before he asked. She only wants to do it so she doesn’t come across as desperate.
10) When she say “yes” then they are officially dating. Real kisses are acceptable now. He won’t pressure her to have intimacy.
11) After some time she is going to want him to meet her family. Family is very important. Some families are very nosy, but it’s up to her to let them intervene or not. If she is a good girl she won’t let them. Just make sure you get along with them and you’ll do fine.

I know it seems very strange to you all of this. But that is the right approach if you want a serious relationship with a latina. If she wants to get “closer” at an early stage it means she is not worth it. Latinas are taught high moral values, so if she doesn’t respect that… it is extremely negative. It might be normal for other cultures but down here is not acceptable. That would make her an easy girl and she would probably cheat on him easily.
If you can find the right one you won’t regret it. She will make you feel that you are a king. Breakfast in bed, small details here and there, defend you over everything, putting you in first place when it comes to choose between you and work, etc.
For those who are from a different culture, that type of an attitude could seem as fake, forced by the males, stupidly submissive, pushover, etc. For a few ones that could be the case, I’m not going to lie. But for most of us it’s only an expression of true love. We dream with finding the right guy to be able to do this with. We are hopelessly romantic. So, do not take it the wrong way =)

Keep in touch. I’m happy to be able to pay you back and help=)))

Have a fantastic day!

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Björn

May 24th, 2010 at 05:24

@Latina girl

Allthose procedures in themselves does not seem too bad to be honest. Except for the real kissing part that does not happen untill its official. I have a soft spot for kissing and if I meet a girl that I am not atleast allowed to kiss then I always figure that she is not interessted in me. It is a big contrast to what I am used to. Over here it is like this, you meet, you do it. And if you like each other you keep on meeting. But it is good to know that things can be slow. In a way it can be alot better because you will really get to know the person before anything serious starts. I will keep all of this in mind =D.

Thanks for taking the time to write down all these answers, ill be sure to remember them =D

@At swedish girls sucks

Atleast meet a swedish woman in real life before spouting your nonsense.

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Dano

May 24th, 2010 at 09:54

@Bjorn & Latinagirl…you two really need to get a room! Or at least swap email addy’s :P

I think the Swedish guys are taking all this rather well considering,lol.

If this was about the uselessness of American or Brit men then this would be 10 pages of the most terrible swearing you’ve ever seen,and 15 pages all about..”ya’ll are faggots n bitches! Gimme yo goddamn address,i’ll come bitchslap you punk ass!” And probably worse.(add copious amounts of really bad spelling.)

I love all that internet macho crap lol. “bring yo punk ass to LA bro and i’ll beat you to a pulp!”…”bring yo punk ass to Detroit and i’ll beat you,shoot yo dog!”
“Umm ok..just let me book flights and pay a fortune so you can beat me up.NOT!…You want to beat me up then you’ll be getting all the fun,so you f”’ing pay and do all the travelling to come to me!”
“Machismo”…love it! :)

But i digress sorry.Maybe this is where (the average) swedish men go wrong? Stand up for yourselves.You’re ex vikings for gods sake! Find some balls…literally!
Just don’t respond like Americans and Brit’s would.Just say “no” to fantasy internet violence!

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DeepSoul

May 24th, 2010 at 10:53

@Swedish Girls Sucks
Are you a Swedish male? Would you ever want somebody generalizing your mom or sister? No matter where you go in this world, there are people with good or bad behavior. That is the truth. Do you think all women from former Soviet nations have the best intentions for you? It is all individual, don’t you think? Ask yourself first, are you giving women the kind of relationships they are looking for? We must look within first, before critizing others. ;)

@Dano
Are you getting ready for a Rap Music convention? lol Good gracious, you are making Snoop Dogg look like Prince Charles :P Hhmm…American men..trying to think if I know many who talk like that. Just like that one old lady said, “T.V. rots your brains!” HAHA I have seen the worst American entertainment exports overseas, and I simply say, “Damnit, why? Hmmm..did they ever show that in America? Thank goodness they didn’t.” Unfortunately, the rest of the world is subjected to “B” films and horrible music. I think that is truly America’s best weapon on terror, but it’s just my opinion. :D

@Latina girl & Bjorn
You two give great advice to each other. That is what communication is all about! ;)

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Dano

May 24th, 2010 at 11:35

@Deepsoul…Oh trust me on this one my friend..I spent 6 years in yahoo chat rooms and 2 more blogging,and freely admit to being an antagonist lol.I’ve had internet fights with Americans that even snoop wouldn’t be able to understand!!
I don’t make this stuff up mate..they’re out there,and a damn lot of them too! :)

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Latina girl

May 24th, 2010 at 17:44

@Björn
I have a question for you (another one lol). My swedish friend has been ignoring me. For example, I’m with a group of friends just having a good time and he walks by but doesn’t even turn to see me. Then after a couple of hrs he comes again but doesn’t go straight to me, not even looks at me. He says hi to others and starts talking to them, then moves to another little group of friends and does the same thing. It’s like he doesn’t want people to know that we are friends or that he even remembers me. Finally, after saying hi to EVERYONE, he makes eye contact and comes to say hi to me. He has done that on different occasions as well. To me, that particular one I’m telling you about was like if he wanted me to approach him, but I didn’t. So later, he finally takes some courage and comes, but it was difficult for him because i wasn’t alone. But he always does that, he gives me attention and then ignores me. He wants me to play the cat or something. I wanna be the mouse, not the cat. So now i decided that i’m not going to do anything, i’m not going to take the initiative, nothing. I’m just gonna respond to whatever he does. But i’m almost sure that he won’t do anything. There are more things involved, but that kinda sums it up. What do you think????

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maria

May 24th, 2010 at 19:17

prejudices.. I think that it’s kind of true that we are generaly more beautiful, but all those demands? All swedish guys are not like that, some maby, but some ways “foreign” guys are sometimes is not very nice -like we would go all the way in one night- we are not that slutty. And all girls are not blonde, we have a lot of different haircolors, it mey be so that we have some kind of blonde orginal color..
swedish girls are very unsure of them self, we are very fixated with how we look and with our weight

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Latina girl

May 25th, 2010 at 02:31

@Björn
By the way, I know it looks like I just have a crush on him because he doesn’t even know that I exist but it is not true. We have the best time together, chat, email, etc. But that’s just when we are alone or just a few people. Although he can also ignore me trough email and msn. Not on sms.
I don’t know if his ignoring me means that he is busy (doubt it), playing a confusing game, or shyness.

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Björn

May 25th, 2010 at 14:38

@Dano

Pretty much everything on that list is exaggerated. If there is any swedish male that has all those flaws, it wont be because he is swedish, it would be because he is mentally disturbed lol. Some guy here and there could have 1 or 2 of them, but every guy I know and talk to at work/parties/whatever would pretty much laugh their asses off if they heard about any guy, swedish or otherwise who would act like that list describes.

I dont feel the need to stand up for myself, this blog and all these women wanting to know how to find a swedish man, and those that have said so many nice things about my country men =). It should be proof enough that swedish males are not quite so bad as that list would have you beleive.

We drink alot, but that is something we enjoy. But we most certainly are capable of talking to someone without alcohol. However, if that someone is a person that I dont really enjoy talking to, then I need to be drunk LOL.

@Latina girl

Seems like a very weird guy to me, if you already know each other then he has no reason to act shy. Dont think any normal guy would be shy to talk to a girl that he already knows and talks to reguraly otherwise.

Does he speak spanish? maybe that can be a problem if you and your friends tend to talk spanish even when he is with you and he does not understand and being unable to join in on the conversation. Perhaps he does not like your friends, its not that uncommon that people dont like each others friends. You should just ask him why to be honest.

About only wanting to be the mouse, I can see your point. But the problem with the mouse is that a mouse can never chose the cat that are chasing them =P.

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Latina girl

May 25th, 2010 at 15:09

@Björn
True about the mouse!
He is kinda weird lol but to be honest that is one of the things that attracts me to him. I’d love to figure him out!
I need to pay more attention if the language is the problem. Although I don’t think it is because he behaves exactly the same on msn and sometimes email. I really think he is playing some game. I think he ignores me so i go all crazy thinking why did he do that to me if we just had a great conversataion the other day? Then I won’t stop thinking about him to the point of finally going to him and ask him what happened. That way I would be going after him (like a cat) and he will be safe from rejection maybe. So that makes me be angry with him, but then he comes and does a nice thing to me and I feel all happy again… weird. If that is his plan, it’s working because now I value the small things he does to me, and if he was nice to me all the time maybe I would take them for granted (not meaning that i like that behavior but being honest in recognizing that it’s working). It’s like he doesn’t let me be angry for a long time. I do things for him, but i have to realize that he does things for me too. They are usually bigger than mine, so i know he cares about me. My conclusion is that I think he knows what he is doing and he is using psychology with me. Like i said, there are more things involved in this soap opera lol. But the ignoring part is what has been bugging me the most.

I can’t thank you enough for your time =)))). By the way, i have deepsoul added to my msn.

Ha en trevlig dag! =P

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DeepSoul

May 25th, 2010 at 17:46

@Dano

Oh goodness, you have talked with “The cream of the crop of losers” in America! People who don’t have any jobs, or a life in general lol. The majority of the American people would actually make fun of them. That is why comedians make skits out of their behavior.

@Bjorn
LOL! :D
“We drink alot, but that is something we enjoy. But we most certainly are capable of talking to someone without alcohol. However, if that someone is a person that I dont really enjoy talking to, then I need to be drunk LOL”

@Latina girl
I have you on! ;)

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Dano

May 26th, 2010 at 10:37

@Deepsoul – Oh yes i used to hunt them down and antagonise them into exploding,(which was never hard)it used to cheer up the chatrooms as some of the things they came out with were truly hilarious!
Example:
“we kicked your goddamn brit arses out of here hahahahaha!”

“Ah huh that’s true.Hmm..and in what year did that happen exactly?” (1776 and a bonus point if they got 1812 lol)

“in…it was….umm……….WE KICKED YOUR GODDAMN ARSE!”

..and they were by no means the worst lol.Other Americans used to beg me to stop tormenting the guy/girl as it was so embarrassing!
small things amuse..i guess,but it passed the time lol.

Back to Sweden :)

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rahul

May 27th, 2010 at 21:47

HI i am indian. coming to stockholm by next month. i need a swedish blonde girl.

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Björn

May 30th, 2010 at 00:58

@ Latina girl

Seems to me that he might be careful and take things slow to make sure things are in line with what you told in how to pick up a latin woman. He might just be concentrating in how to do that and then take it too far.

Cant really blame him for that, I mean how do you know when to try to kiss a girl if things have to start out as if being only friends but at the same time the idea is to only get together as a couple? =). It will be hard to know the difference if you are used to atleast being able to get a few kisses hehe. Anyway, I hope that it will work out in the end =D

@ Rahul

This is not a escort site lol. If you need a swedish blonde girl I recomend that you try to find some site that offers them for a price. But beyond that, you will have to work your charms.

And just a tip since alot of foreigners seems to get this wrong. Just because some hot girls is sun bathing topless at some local beach does NOT mean she is for sale. That is just what girls do in sweden, if you want to look then be sure to wear sun glasses because otherwise it will be too obvious and then they might take offense =P

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Dano

May 30th, 2010 at 09:54

Sigh…Actually it’s a sad fact that guys like Rahul and guys from Arabic nations etc really do expect to just arrive and have pale skinned blondes throw themselves at him from all angles as some sort of “Welcome” package!
Western women,not just swedes etc,are seen as total promiscuious sluts!and i’m pretty sure that most are very disappointed on arriving and not getting it three times before reaching passport control!
(If like me they grew up on “Swedish Erotica” films…then they’ll be seriously depressed when they arrive! lol)

It’d be nice to see a survey from the hot Swedish girl clubbers who have to deal with these kind of guys on a regular basis.Probably turn up some really funny stories,as well as a deep insight into how middle eastern and Indian men expect western women to react to them.

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Latina girl

May 31st, 2010 at 19:18

@Björn
You might be right. He probably doesn’t know how slow should he be. Or it could be too that he only wants friendship with me and I misinterpret some of the things he does thinking that they mean semething else. At least he does not have a girlfriend.

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turk

June 1st, 2010 at 03:33

@Dano
I totally agree with you. It is so sad but true. Maybe the reason for that is foreign girls (for ex. from Russia,Ukraine,Scandinavia or UK) come to Antalya, Alanya and sleep with men so easily. Then people think them as sluts. But that is not the case.
“i need a swedish blonde girl”. lol .They do not open their legs and wait for you,Rahul.

I read all posts and thanks to everyone sharing opinions. I can share my experience in Sweden too. I agree that Swedish males are gorgeous, in shape and well-dressed. I also agree that “balls” part. My swedish male friends are aso not good at going to girls and talk. Maybe it is due to their previous experiences with swedish girls. Some of them say swedish girls act stupid in relationships. Some think spanish or latin girls are hotter. I guess it is because latins and mediterraneans express their feelings better and make men feel more like a man.

Anyway, as this is a “meet a blond girl” page, I should add that it is a hard,sweet challenge, you better get ready for that :)

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DeepSoul

June 2nd, 2010 at 19:29

@Rahul
“HI i am indian. coming to stockholm by next month. i need a swedish blonde girl”

First off, I will say your statement is ridiculous and offensive! As India is a large country, and people practice different ways of social interaction, you strongly prove a lack of any skills!
#1. Recognize that women are not objects.
#2. Take some lessons on how to present yourself to others. First impressions are lasting ones! You really didn’t do a good job here. :(
#3. Just learn how to respect others, as you would want to be.
#4. I strongly suggest that you take some courses on western society, as your preconceived notions are just fictional.
#5. If you go to Sweden, or the majority of the world, with your current mentality, you will find it difficult to make any healthy relationships in general.

@Dano
LOL..when you were talking with the Americans, I think you must have been talking with ones who were either still alive from the wars of 1776, and 1812…or just reincarnated ones HAHA. Yes, it is true that there are some people who are rather ethnocentric, but the majority are not. Overall, I can speak for myself, and many who I know, who really like British people and the rest of the world. Though, we, as women, do not tolerate behavior like Rahul’s hehe..sorry Rahul. I can imagine that the other Americans were probably equally harrassing the same people as you, Dano lol. Yes, embarrassing behavior. My family is pretty much military, and there is a long, traditional line of it. However, I can tell you that many of the friends they have made, or married, were from other cultures. :) I guess your conversations with them can be considered foreign policy? HAHA

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Princess

June 2nd, 2010 at 20:00

@Turk

Think I might have mentioned balls – anyway why are so many men so wet? Has feminism emasculated them? Why in particular should the gorg Swedish males be lacking in the balls dept? Though had to say a v drunk (and not gorg at all) Swede did start talking to me in a bar in Stockholm. Unfortunately it was about Man U so I quickly tuned out! I like a bit of cockiness at least it shows some get up and go. I like a challenge and all but…

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PABLO

June 18th, 2010 at 00:16

I am a guy from Argentina, I have been reading all the messages and I am sure that swedish guys suffer about this article as much as if I would be a swedish guy.I love Swedish women.Anton you are right!

Though I think that some things of this article may be true, I do not fall into generalizations.There is one thing true: Youre women are wanted by everybody and that hurts! As a western man I think it is up to you to defend what it is yours as the vikings used to do, that is what men do,just defend what is yours.If you don´t, the beauty of swedish girls will be lost forever!.
I do not want that swedish beauty to be lost! Defend what is yours! It is up to your women to understand that they do no have the worst men in the world.They are handsome amd more civilized than others.If the swedish beauty is lost, than the western society will loose a part of it´s soul for ever!
I love you Sweden!

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Raphael

June 24th, 2010 at 03:27

Hello all :)

Really nice post Sapphire and lets hope more Swedish women will replay on your post. I agree with you on many things but I think Swedish guys are almost the same as others who live in Europe.
I don’t wanna write many things about myself here as this is not a dating website ( or did i miss something? ^^). I’m 29 and i live in Ireland but my origins are polish. I can say guys here in Ireland or in Poland are similar to Swedish. Not all ofcourse as i do belive, not all Swedish guys are the same. I had long time ago a Swedish girl with Norwich origins and she told me that Swedish girls are as more intrested with foregin guys as Swedish guys with foregin women. Swedish people are really nice and friendly (at last i met these^^), but little problem is in relationships. Swedish guys are a little bit cold and they put families / girlfriends on the second place. On first place are career and friends mostly other males. Swedish girls do not need 24 hour attention from guy side but they need respect and understanding from guys side. Also they want their man be not only a lover but also a good friend. Swedish girls also dont like when guys paying most of the time for everything and they want to share bills etc even if you like it or not. What i noticed when i was in beautiful city Göteborg is that many young people very rare spoke to each other. Couples could go for a walk and do long distance without any word! :( Only girls talked to each other same as bouys to other boys. I do not know reason and as much as i love psychology i just can’t answer why is that way. For me blonde Swedish girls are most beautiful on the world but beauty it’s not everything becouse inteligence is very important too. Next year or in two i wanna move to Stockholm and live there. Would love to find inteligent and beautiful blonde swedish girl there but … im divorced and i have no idea if it’s a problem or not ^^ ( dont have kids :p ) . I would like to hear more about swedish girls here what they like and dislike and what is important for them in relationships. Any other good tips are most welcome especialy from Swedish girls side ^^ Also you can write to me on http://www.facebook.com/rafalwielgat . Thank you all for attention and waiting for replays :)

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Sara

June 26th, 2010 at 22:22

OMG, you’re so wrong about us swedish girls!

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Raphael

June 26th, 2010 at 23:49

If you mean me Sara then write how Swedish girls are :) I just wrote about Swedish girls from Göteborg. Also i found a website where one guy from USA moved to europe and wrote posts about european women and here is post about Swedish Women: http://claritaslux.com/girls/swedish-girls/

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Justin

June 27th, 2010 at 00:30

I need advice.

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Latin Guy

June 27th, 2010 at 10:18

In my visit to Sweden I did find that they certainly find different cultures very attractive. I am a naturalized US citizen born in Mexico with my family ancestry mostly from Spain.

Life its not so bad in the US for me, but I still have to work for it if I want to meet someone nice. To maintain the attention of the very pretty girls here you have to have a good interesting personality as looks alone won’t get you very far.

In here (US) I would say that the blonde hair blue eyed guy would be more exotic and possibly more attractive as someone that is olive skinned dark haired dark eyed like me. Just for the fact that its not so common here.

In here lets say a girl that gets a 10 out of 10 (which is a 7 out of 10 by swedish standards……) Have this air of superiority, as in you’re one of many men that has approached her before. She is a commodity and me as the guy I have to prove my value to her from the start.

In sweden, it was just plain ridicoulous, akin to shooting fish in a barrel. Latin guys are not that common, and just by being there at all I had their attention. They would be very happy that im just talking to them and some of them displayed this nervouness shyness around me towards me during initial contact. Most were happy I chose them over the other countless pretty girls there. In there I definitively had an edge over the local men, both as a foreigner, and possibly as someone that by their standards is a bit exotic looking. It took no work to meet new friends over there. I could say whatever I wanted almost and it would work well.

I had such a good experience, I am now learning the language through live mocha, and will make the scandinavian countries a yearly thing for me at least. Ill make sure Im in even better shape too for good measure as well.

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Dano

July 2nd, 2010 at 09:33

@ Latin guy – so,like the Grand banks are prime fishing ground for American fishermen – Scandinavia is about to become your main shagging ground?
Of course you’ll tell all your friends how easy swedish girls are,and we’ll be engulfed with an influx of horny Mexicans looking for a quick jump!
You’ll do better on the beaches here in Skåne,where all the hot chicks spend their summers.Please visit often,and wear lots of that Mexican gold religious stuff and bling.
It won’t really help with the girls,but as a metal detectorist it’ll certainly help me when you lose it all at the beach! :D

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peaceangels

July 3rd, 2010 at 16:42

Love you of all, beautiful swedish blonde girls.

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Rajagopalan

July 8th, 2010 at 11:02

It is more interesting to know about the perception and practice of dating community in Europe than the blog post on Swedish girls. As an Indian I could say that three is a definite biological divide between men and women. Understanding, supporting, appreciating and respecting each other and their values is the bottom line of success in married life. Legal rights and liberated thoughts do take the backbench and will not contribute to conjugal happiness.
I am a blogger I need material on the subject ‘Dating and girls all over the world’. I would appreciate your real life contributions. Thanks and regards.

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LoverOfCommonSense!

July 11th, 2010 at 06:22

@Latina Girl: Regarding your May 6th post on men/women differences and why they are good… Incredibly well put! It couldn’t have been expressed better!!

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LoverOfCommonSense!

July 11th, 2010 at 06:41

@Dano “..”ya’ll are faggots n bitches! Gimme yo goddamn address,i’ll come bitchslap you punk ass!” And probably worse.(add copious amounts of really bad spelling.)
I love all that internet macho crap lol. “bring yo punk ass to LA bro and i’ll beat you to a pulp!”…”bring yo punk ass to Detroit and i’ll beat you,shoot you and rape yo dog!”..”

Uh, seriously, Dano, a very limited amount of Americans speak like that… and even then, mostly only in hardcore rap music. Me thinks you’ve been overloading on the entertainment system too long, “homey”. Ha!

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Sapphire

July 12th, 2010 at 13:47

@Rahul – Agreeing with DeepSoul that your comment was offensive and objectified women.

On a side note: I do receive these kinds of comments every couple weeks and they come from men in Asian/African nations. Being Asian, it disappoints me that men see women as not only objects, but request that strangers fulfill their demands without question.

If YOU are that type of man, you are not welcome to this.

—–

@Raphael: Do you have any Swedish female friends? We would love to hear more about you and why you want to move to Sweden. =)

@Rajagopalan: “Legal rights and liberated thoughts do take the backbench and will not contribute to conjugal happiness.” Why do you say that? Because of my open opinions and thoughts I will contribute to a happier relationship with my husband through expressed understandings.

Legal protection gives me the comfort to know that if my husband dies I am not left on the streets to fend for myself (via a life insurance policy) nor is he if I die. A hundred years ago, women had no property inheritance or financial stability guaranteed by law. Now we do. THAT decreases marital instability in relationships.

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Susanna

July 17th, 2010 at 22:18

I’m a 23-year-old swedish girl, live in Stockholm. I would love to meet some americans here in Sweden. Please send me an e-mail! s.usa.nna at hotmail dot com :)

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Dano

July 18th, 2010 at 13:52

@Loverof–Have you read some of the comments below videos on youtube lately? I’ve been online in chatrooms for years now and blogs…”a very limited amount of Americans speak like that”?? lol,umm wrong!

@Susanna –
Height? –
Weight? –
Hair colour? –
Breast size? –
Dress size? –
good sense of humour? – yes/no (delete as applicable)
Full set of teeth and amazingly white? –
Smoker/non smoker? –
Hot/shy/easy going/promiscious? –
Amount of drinks required before willing to get it on? –
Cost of an average date with yourself? –

Expectations of American man applied for?:
Under 300lbs/ intelligent(not applicable)/ non-serial killer/ non white supremacist gun nut/ Humble and non-arrogant (unlikely).

Please print out,fill in and mail to “American men R us”,Kungsgatan 32,33602 Södermalm,Stockholm.
You may prefer the faster route of standing in the middle of Gamla Stan and screaming “I WANNA SCREW A YANK!”.

Yup,it’s another boring sunday! Anyone fancy doing a Brit version of this in response? lol.

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Princess

July 21st, 2010 at 22:22

@Dano – Brits don’t have expectations for God’s sake.

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Celine

August 9th, 2010 at 20:33

Haha, it’s quite hilarious to reed all this. I’m a Swedish girl, and goddamnit, stop being to prejudiced! haha.

Sure, I’m blonde and I got blue eyes, but the “info” about what we like and don’t like.. I mean come on, we’re all individuals! We aren’t from Mars, you know :)

And @Dano: Those questions are just so rude, try show some respect instead.

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Dacke

August 13th, 2010 at 19:02

I agree with Celine, a hilarious read. I’m a Swedish guy living in the U.S., married to an American girl. As someone who has also had Swedish girlfriends, I think you’re missing a few points. Although I know this is not a sociological dissertation, in my experience, the Swedish girl you are describing and what she is supposed to prefer, seems based on a lower class, lower education stereotype, or alternatively, a part of the “new conservative” streak you can detect in Sweden.

Of course when you’re very young you’re just interested in partying and having fun, so the interest in foreign men of Swedish girls can probably be explained that way. However, I have known many foreign guys in Sweden at universities, mostly from the Anglo-Saxon world, and almost none have been at all successful in the Swedish love department. A lot of Swedish girls are put off by a way of acting which was part of their grandfathers’ generation. And if an American guy opens his mouth about anything political, he’s probably not going to be successful. I would say that 90% of Swedish girls would not be OK with a guy in the long run who does not share Swedish values (which are quite extreme by international standards). Some Swedish girls are OK with Catholic, American or Muslim values (neither of which respect women very well), but most are not.

Swedish values raise the bar for both men and women. I obviously cook and clean, but I also do renovations and fix computers. Such skills, along with a certain degree of intellectual maturity, seem to have been taken for granted by a lot of Swedish girls that I have associated with.

And another thing, why is it so difficult for foreigners to understand that Swedes may be perceived as “boring” because of language difficulties? To master a language enough to make jokes and be the life of a party usually takes about 10 years of practice. All you foreigners here, can you tell a joke like Robert Gustavsson?

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Jiang

August 14th, 2010 at 05:16

lol, this is funny. People just assume Swedish people are all Blonde/Blue. Is this true??

I am Chinese guy and I think Swedish girls are very pretty :)

But I hate stereotypes.

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Vincent

August 17th, 2010 at 00:13

Totally agree with you.
I have lived for almost one year, here in Sundsvall I see many African men and Swedish girls couples. Languages should not be the problem of dating Swedish girls, since most of the African guy’s Swedish I know are not that good, but your balls count. Most African guys dating Swedish girls, are somewhat confident and feeling good about themselves.
Thats my two points.

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Sapphire

August 18th, 2010 at 20:48

@Dacke – Thanks for your comment. What is the “new conservative” in your opinion (i have none on that atm).

Also, when you say “… [if an] American guy opens his mouth about anything political, he’s probably not going to be successful.” Is it because Americans are far more conservative politically? If that is the case, I can see that being a big issue here. So many “issues” in America are non-issues in Sweden that arguing for/against (especially against) gay rights, abortion, universal health care would fare poorly with a Swedish girl.

@Vincent – Confidence and feeling good about yourself: Double win. Shyness and nervousness are acceptable, but be proud of yourself. That’s the key to winning a girl’s heart.

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Thomas

August 19th, 2010 at 05:35

You should have no problems getting a book deal! Your writing is genuine, refreshing and truly entertaining. You haven’t soured my opinion or taste of Swedish women at all. As an American man, I found your site through a referral. I’ll be back for sure. It’s fun. Keep up the good work and tell the guys to stop drinking booze like Swedish fish!

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Lauren(:

August 29th, 2010 at 20:50

Im Swedish and every time i tell a guy that they say ohh thats why your so hot.

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Jenn@

August 29th, 2010 at 20:57

Im Swedish with Brown hair and green eyes naturally.

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Pedro

August 30th, 2010 at 18:15

100% true.

My swedish girlsfrinedn just broke up with me because i lost my job.

Cheers from Portugal – Azores

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Dano

August 31st, 2010 at 09:48

@Celine – I’m only rude when i open my mouth or as in this case..type something! :)

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brandon

September 13th, 2010 at 03:32

Sounds like i need to go to Sweden considering all the men over there are litte pusies. i mean theres no reason to be scared to talk to women even the very attractive ones. What the worst answer you can get from them? no? i mean common lol. But overall nice article

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Dano

September 14th, 2010 at 09:30

@Brandon – So what’s stopping you son? Come and show them how a REAL man gets women!
Thinking about it,if you don’t know the worst that a girl/woman can say in response to a “chat up” situation,then it’s unlikely you have much experience yet,and dubious if you’re even a “man” yet?
I get the feeling you’re a yank? Been outside your country yet? Things can be very different when you come to other countries and cultures.It’s not that they’re all pusies,because believe me..they’re not! It’s just that they grow up and become instilled with certain beliefs and quirks about the opposite sex and what is “the norm” for dealing with them.
Girls basically grow up and mature faster in most western countrie,and a girl who doesn’t turn out to be your basic “easy” can grow a very mature and at times vicious mind! Swedes can be painfully shy,and the American/UK way of chatting girls up can be seen as mega intrusive.Trying to chat up a pretty girl on a bus or out shopping can gain you a response you’d only expect if you were a serial killer trying to sweetalk your next victim!

You could come here and have a really succesful time.You could also come here and get slaughtered and embarrassed,and because you don’t speak the language,you probably wouldn’t even know!
Try not to fall into the trap of “generalizing” mate,because doing that can get you into a lot of trouble.
There are Swedish guys who are real fannies…and there are Swedish guys who’d scare members of MS13! I hope you know which ones to call “fussy” son! ;)

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Kumar

September 14th, 2010 at 21:41

I’m just curious about something. I am an Indian-American guy who came from a Hindu family but later became a Christian. I also attended a Swedish-American Lutheran college, but was more into the very exotic types of women at that time. Right now I have an acute case of the Vikette fever ;-). I am a handsome, intelligent, and successful 27 y/o guy.

But I do not speak a word of Swedish. And I am a pretty devout Christian, want a large family (like 5-7 kids), believe that men should be chivalrous, and want to share my faith with others (especially Muslims and Atheists).

Yet at the same time I have always been extremely progressive. I would want a woman to be highly educated and to work outside the home as I would want her to have some independence if something happened to me. I also believe in evolution, sex-education, reproductive rights, and gender equality. And I live a very ecofriendly lifestyle, am concerned about climate change, and believe in universal healthcare.

Swedish girls are not only beautiful but they are so intelligent and sophisticated too. They read, travel, and have independent minds. And Sweden seems like such a nice place to raise a family because education and healthcare are phenomenal and not so expensive. I truly admire the cohesive and corruption-free societies that Scadanavians have built.

But could I fit in? Are there Swedish girls who want a traditional family and want to attend church and pray together (or at least can be missionary dated, lol, j/k). Many Christian girls in the US who want this are waaay too conservative, often superstitious, and do not think critically. I feel like I don’t fit in either way. Are there Swedish girls who have the best of both worlds who might be into my type?

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Kumar

September 14th, 2010 at 21:52

Ahh yes, and finally, I am not looking to get married right away as I want some time for my own development. But I also do not want to just hookup and definitely do not want to get girls drunk to do so. Does this exist? Some girls will become devout Muslims when they marry guys from those countries because it is exotic, the girls are naive, and the education system and media are too politically correct to criticize it in the way they have lambasted Christianity for decades. And some like African men, even asylum seekers with criminal records because they believe in the myth, because of the taboo nature, or because they think that they can be some kind of agent of social change.

But are there the kinds who will be interested in the kinds of guys that their parents might also like?

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Sheila

September 26th, 2010 at 05:22

Hi, everybody:

I had fun reading all these remarks about people from other culture. One thing is certain. I like blond men and brown haired men. I think blond men are more chivalrous than majority of other men. And I like the Scandinavian man features too. I am a white Latin woman, with medium brown hair (blond during childhood), big brown eyes and nice features. I would love to meet a blonde or light brown haired man who likes white latin women. I have a latin personality and gentle nature. And I have a nice figure and very attractive facial features. My email address is sheila092001 at yahoo dot com.

I would like to know names of websites to date scandinavian men. I would like to meet one Scandinavian man. And I would like to have comments of people. I am very liberal in my thinking and I respect all kinds of opinions as long as they do not harm other people. People have different personalities and ways of thinking. That is what makes each of us interesting.

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Dagur

October 2nd, 2010 at 14:55

I think icelandic girls are so much hotter

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DJ

October 9th, 2010 at 06:09

Yes being with someone besides ur own culture, colour is truly exotic, see i am seeing a swede and me being tanned (native american/canadian), she goes crazy about my skin colour, my hair my language, vice versa for me, its different and the culture, hair, etc attracts me as well, we were two different people, in race, culture, language etc and we were instantly attracted to eachother, so voila! we are married and together :D

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danosucks

October 10th, 2010 at 10:00

Dano appears to be the village idiot who for someone reason is obsessed with Americans.

Good thing he hangs out in chatrooms all days and antagonizes 13 year olds and wannabe gangstas.

Keep living the dream bro’.

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Truthhurts

October 10th, 2010 at 10:05

“There are Swedish guys who are real fannies…and there are Swedish guys who’d scare members of MS13! I hope you know which ones to call “puussy” son! ;)”

You clearly have no idea what you are talking about. Seriously. Stop.

Let me guess…you are around 15 years old??

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Malin

October 21st, 2010 at 23:39

I love this! I am a Swedish girl, and ever since I was little, I fantasized about an American man. So the real question is how to fix one?! ;)

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The Endless Dream on a Winter Night

October 27th, 2010 at 09:42

[…] Swedish girls are usually very attractive, not my favourite in terms of beauty but almost my favourite; they can be the best or the worst as far as meeting is concerned: I love the emancipation they’ve reached which allows them to pick you up openly if they fancy you. […]

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DeepSoul

October 27th, 2010 at 09:56

@Malin…really?? hehe Let’s have a trade off. You come to America, I go to Sweden..deal? ;)

@Truthhurts…Shit! MS13! I looked up that group! That is some scary group!! Don’t think I’d want to be hanging around them anytime soon, and apparently they are in Florida!! F#CK! :O

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Dano

October 27th, 2010 at 16:58

Hate missing posts here! I seem to have a fan club lol. You know you’ve made it when people start making up pseudonyms about you!!

@truth – I know exactly what i’m talking about.Do you?…And keep guessing!

@DS – Why you talking to truth about MS13? It was me who mentioned them lol. :P
Hope your well hun.

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Vic

November 4th, 2010 at 21:46

ok reading this made me a tad panicy over dying my blonde hair brown yesterday. The first thing my (aussie) bf said when he saw it was like “what the fuck have you done” Geez what is it with with u guys and swedish blondes, who the fudge cares about hair color??

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Marc

November 11th, 2010 at 21:49

Hey there, I’m a 23 year old american male living in New Jersey. Does anyone know of the best ways to meet beautiful Swedish women around my area? I can’t seem to find any dating sites or anything.

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Olivia

November 13th, 2010 at 11:18

Hello every one.
I hate you all. Leav Sweden alone RETARDS! your just after sex.. and i hate when guys like you are that way

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Colin

November 25th, 2010 at 21:50

heyyy… im coming to stockholm in december the 8th till 12th. really cannot wait.. few things i was wanting to know… what are swedish like with foreigners?? will they know if we are foreign without hearing us talk?? do they prefer scottish over english etc?? ar the women attracted to british men? do they find us exotic?? is it easy to converse with swedish women??? all help would be greatly appreciated!! oh! and are allt he women really tall?? im quite short!!

Read more: Contact http://lostinstockholm.com/contact/#ixzz16KURvwnh

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Dano

November 26th, 2010 at 14:48

@Olivia – Fancy a quick shag babe? :)

@ Colin –
1/ reserved
2/ No
3/ No (but the accent may draw the curious)
4/ Debateable
5/ NO!
6/ Not initially
7/ They’re a tall race in general,but Sweden has short people too.

In conclusion – Your 4 day sojourn is highly unlikely to get you laid 4 days running!

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Gabriel

November 27th, 2010 at 20:18

Well this site left me with my mouth open and amazed!
This is not possible! WHY do sweeden men DO WHAT YOU SAY they do?!
I would do WHATEVER A SWEEDEN WOMEN WHANTS and likes :-) , only to spend some time with me!
And sweeden men don’t aprecciate what they ALLREADY HAVE?!
Very bad…
Alcoohol destroys the brain and human body …
BAD AGAIN…
I’m an romanian guy , 1,78 m , 28 years old, very dark hair (and long) , athletic and single ! :-)
Oh , and I adore blond women!
Maybe it’s time to visit Sweeden!

Älskar er alla, blonda tjejer!

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Colin

November 28th, 2010 at 22:51

im not going to get laid…

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Formica Virus

November 29th, 2010 at 17:14

Colin & Dano – Rofl.

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Dano

November 29th, 2010 at 22:42

One tries to help FV mate! :)

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jake

November 30th, 2010 at 20:14

Is it uncommon for swedish women to stay in the same bed at night with a best friend that is male? even if there is no sex.
Is casual sex with a male friend (if the women has a boyfriend, that is not in the country ) common if they are good friends?
Just need a honest opinion from a 3rd party, thanks

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Dano

December 2nd, 2010 at 10:31

Lol!…It’s common for a girl to jump a male friend even if her boyfriend is in the next room,never mind out of the country!!!

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Formica Virus

December 2nd, 2010 at 14:55

Jake – Yep, totally agree with Dano. Although, I’ve had some isolated experiences which speak to the contrary.

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Formica Virus

December 2nd, 2010 at 14:59

Totally misread Dano’s comment, sorry :D I can smell the humour all the way from here btw. Girls don’t jump their guy-friends if they have a boyfriend often but i’ve had some isolated experiences where it’s happened that the girlfriend goes looking for greener pastures, if y’know what I’m saying…

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jake

December 2nd, 2010 at 15:41

Thank you for the replies, read all the negatives on swedish women thats why i asked the last question. I must say I had a great time with her with out alcohol, and she is very open, but reserved in public and she was a bit shocked that i would say hello to a person on the street i didn’t know. tack

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Dano

December 3rd, 2010 at 21:07

@FV – you were a bit slow there mate! lol

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Rahul Reddy

December 3rd, 2010 at 21:25

I am an Indian-American guy who came from a Hindu family but later became a Christian. I also attended a Swedish-American Lutheran college, but was more into the very exotic types of women at that time. Right now I have an acute case of the Vikette fever ;-). I am a handsome, intelligent, and successful 27 y/o guy.

I would want a woman to be highly educated and to work outside the home as I would want her to have some independence if something happened to me. I also believe in evolution, sex-education, reproductive rights, and gender equality. And I live a very ecofriendly lifestyle, am concerned about climate change, and believe in universal healthcare.

Swedish girls are not only beautiful but they are so intelligent and sophisticated too. They read, travel, and have independent minds. And Sweden seems like such a nice place to raise a family because education and healthcare are phenomenal and not so expensive. I truly admire the cohesive and corruption-free societies that Scandinavians have built.

But could I fit in? Are there Swedish girls who want a traditional family and want to attend church and pray together (or at least can be missionary dated, lol, j/k). Many Christian girls in the US who want this are waaay too conservative, often superstitious, and do not think critically. I feel like I don’t fit in either way. Are there Swedish girls who have the best of both worlds who might be into my type?

Ahh yes, and finally, I am not looking to get married right away as I want some time for my own development. But I also do not want to just hookup and definitely do not want to get girls drunk to do so. Does this exist? Some girls will become devout Muslims when they marry guys from those countries because it is exotic, the girls are naive, and the education system and media are too politically correct to criticize it in the way they have lambasted other religions for decades. And some like African men, even asylum seekers with criminal records because they believe in the myth, because of the taboo nature, or because they think that they can be some kind of agent of social change.

But are there the kinds who will be interested in the kinds of guys that their parents might also like?

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Mattias

December 11th, 2010 at 00:02

As one of the swedish men, I just have to agree on the fact that we need to grow some balls, absolutely!

When it come to chivalry I would say that it varies from man to man, but more chivalry in general would be nice. However, dont show to much chivalry, it can backfire! Be moderate about it, or as we say “Lagom är bäst!”.

When it comes to men drinking way to much i have to say that the younger the man, the more he drinks. As said above, dont get wasted! They require you to be able to have a intelligent conversation!

Swedish women, as said, rarely initiate anything so you’ll have to, but be carefull with how you do it. In sweden the comfort zone is about an arms lenght and an inch or two. If you dont know the person, dont get to close to quick and look for signs if you’re being uncomfortable!

…And one last thing…
Don’t never, ever make the mistake of thinking that a swedish woman is not intelligent! They’ll know it before you realize it and your balls will end up in their x-mas tree and you’ll have lost all hope with that woman… and her friends!

I bet there’s alot of bad spellings in this one, but i’m sure you’ll understand. I’m way more used to speaking english than I am writing it.

God Jul & Gott Nytt År!
Med vänliga hälsningar,
Mattias

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Owen

December 31st, 2010 at 10:30

What chances does a good-looking Asian man with most of the qualities ( so I have been told by most white girls in San Francisco, which are a fairly diverse sample) the author mentioned? Do they hold any prejudice against Asian men?

I was in Malmo for an interview with Sony-Ericcson couple years back…I did not take the job, but even their receptionist (who’s not even a blonde) is a 10/10 knock out….man…

Thanks for the input.

Owen

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Younes

December 31st, 2010 at 19:56

Well, I think most of these comments are general, and it’ll be unfair to have these preconceptions about Swedish girls. I’d rather say that every woman or a man does have certain traits and grows up with certain expectations. I think the effort should be put into girls who have the same expectations. I would love to meet my expectation in a Swedish girl!

Monterey, CA. USA

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Helga

January 7th, 2011 at 20:22

I just have to say that the things that’s written on the top off the site may be true, but not for everyone!.. I have brown hair, i don’t hate Swedish men and I know many men that isn’t snåla (greedy).
And that part about feminism, you make it sound like you don’t like it.. I would not wanna be together with a man that think men are more worth than women. At least that’s what i think..

// Swedish girl

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Super64

January 9th, 2011 at 03:21

@Helga
Men ARE more valuable than women.
(…after being in my presence you’d think that I was the most valuable man on the planet.)

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Omar

January 11th, 2011 at 15:43

I have been to Stockholm in summer 2008 and spent 4 days there. It was an amazing experience for me.

Yes, I got obsessed with Swedish women but it was not looks that attracted me most. I have been to Eastern Europe and many Eastern European women – and Greek women – look better than Swede girls.

Excluding the German girl who was staying in the same hotel, at least 3 Swedish girls were interested in me during my short visit which is such a record. They expressed interest in a polite and nice way but for some reason I thought they are just being cautious (how stupid of me – lol)

It’s just how sweet and polite everyone was, I could easily fall in love with an average Swede girl because she is much nicer and sweeter than sweet girls I met elsewhere!

Furthermore, and despite the short trip, I didn’t find Swedish men feminine, unless being gentle, kind and polite makes them appear that way!

I am not obsessed with Swede girls any more but it would be amazing if I have a serious relationship with a Swede girl :-)

I love to make friends with anyone from Scandinavia (whether male or female). It’s the most interesting part of the world to me.

Whoever wants to be friends from any part of the world feel free to contact me.

Omar

oalamiri at yahoo com

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Omar

January 11th, 2011 at 15:48

Sorry for the typo in line 9
cautious= courteous

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Helga

January 12th, 2011 at 01:37

@Super64

No, they are not. You know that’s sexistic? And no, i’m sure i wouldn’t.

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Dano

January 13th, 2011 at 11:48

@super64 – Lol. There ain’t nothin’ like “confidence” is there mate? (or should that be “narcissum”?) :)

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LD Traveler

January 17th, 2011 at 02:04

The problem with men is, It takes 15% of them 50-years to grow up, wake up, and feel comfortable in their skin. The other 85% never find themselves. The first thing we men need to understand is that women are no aliens. They are females of the human species with the same emotions, desires and needs you have. Read something intesting to talk about and then meet some women and be interest in THEM, not their bodies. Show your sincere interest in the entire package and one day she’ll say, “I’m falling in love with you!” Dr. Steve Newdell

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John

January 20th, 2011 at 22:29

@Helga

His name is really Superficial64. Super64 is an alias.

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Pablo

February 18th, 2011 at 07:41

I am an exchange student in a small Swedish town. I have been here for almost 6 months and have a lot of feedback regarding this article. I do feel, however, that we must be really careful with describing people in this manner as to avoid generalizations.

I am Latin and have studied in Mexico, the US, Canada, and Italy. I’m only 23 and have lots to see in this world but still can offer some insight about what I like about Swedish dating.

Equality is really nice. Come to think of it as “why should men make the first move?”. If you are subtle, a little colder than how you would be in your country, nice, and careful, it is very likely that a Swedish girl you gave a number to in a bar or after a one-night-stand (I know this sounds clichè but it is true) will call you. Some of my other Erasmus friends don’t really understand this and immediately show their interest in Swedish girls with calls, facebook, etc, and Swedish girls kind of keep their distance. Really, if you have fun and feel confident that she also enjoyed meeting you, the other person will notice you and contact you.

This brings the next phase in the equation: was it just friendship or a crush? well, this is hard to determine and that’s why I insist that if you keep it cold and subtle chances are that the Swedish girl will text you and then you will see what that really means.

I am one of those “needs alcohol to socialize better” kind of guy, unfortunately, and therefore my experiences are limited to parties and clubs. One thing that I like, though, is that usually in the morning if you’re not too keen on saying “hej, good morning! I’m gonna make some coffee and a nice breakfast. Would you like some or do you have to go to class/work?” you can just say nothing and the Swedish girl will notice and just leave. Then you will see her in school or in a party and you can act as if nothing had happened. This is hard to achieve in latin countries without some sort of sexual tension or strings attached.

I am also not to proud of saying that I get lucky with girls here but it’s only because I haven’t met the right one, nor am I looking very hard. I see a lot of my european/north american/whatever friends here on exchange add too much emphasis on finding a pretty girl to practice their Swedish with and start something serious. Many of them fail to even hook up because they get too drunk, try too hard, treat local girls as they treat girls in their country, or simply do not assimilate into the dating mode. ‘When in Rome, do as the Romans do…’

Another thing I’ve learned here is to be less romantic. I used to be the guy who loved to cuddle in the morning and just caress their hair but I’ve noticed that you can’t really do that all the time. This kind of keeps a sense of interesting aura about me that the Swedish girls I have been with definitely like. I have some really close swedish guy friends here so I guess you could say that when I date girls I kind of follow their steps.

I also fractured my ankle 3 weeks ago playing football and therefore am not going to bars as much. Since we always have afterparties I am always there and girls treat me really nice and ask me all these questions like “are you okay” or “how did it happen”, which really help as ice breakers. Some psychologists say that when you help someone you release endorphins and therefore, if you are good looking and have crutches while getting drunk in an afterparty, chances are you that will do well.

Guys, no means no! Big mistakes happen when you see a guy invite a girl to a party or whatever and after a refusal, he keeps on trying. As if by insisting you’re gonna change someone’s mind. Not cool… Remember that sometimes girls just go out for a drink or to catch-up with a friend, not for the whole thing. Just be genuine, funny, and actually enjoy yourself.

Another part of the dating ‘script’ in this small city is that girls, I think, love it when you text them during the week. So if you remember her during, say wednesday at 14:00, you can briefly sms with something like “hey, how did that presentation/whatever work out.” Chances are that if she likes you, next time you see her it will much easier. This is based on the idea that guys sometimes just wanna hook up in bars and don’t really care about the girl. My swedish girl friends tell me that it is really nice to be acknowledged outside those scenarios and that it gets you lots of points. However, I have noticed that it is easier hook-up with girls from bigger cities like Stockholm and Gothenburg that study here. Kind of a bigger city mentality. Hope this is not a bad generalization.

Finally, during one of those afterparties I met a very nice girl from Gothenburg. I’ve kind of kept my distance since I can’t really go out a lot or do more social things due to my leg cast. She has been coming and we have watched movies, cooked, etc but I don’t really want her to get the whole ‘blockbuster’ impression of me. That’s right, one of those who always watches movies on dates, rather monotonous. She is also a crazy party girl who always gets wasted like I do so she is also being very cautious. It’s like we are both trying slowly to start a relationship but at the same time aren’t used to it. I haven’t had a serious relationship since my semester abroad in Italy 3 years ago!

So things are going well and I am proud of not having just thrown myself at her like I would in a latin country. I am being careful and so is she. Friendships are gold.

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"L" & "K"

March 3rd, 2011 at 10:21

i think you have a good point! me and my friend “k” thinks you RUUUUULE!
have a nice day! greetings from two swedish girls (who know what we want)

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Jack

March 12th, 2011 at 01:42

Swedish girls are over-rated. I live here (American/California) and they are nice to look at for the first few days but afterwards the unsmiling snobbishness 365 days a year ruins them.

The guys are even more ridiculous. I have many solid Swedish friends (male) and I rip on them almost every time we go out. Zero game, and zero balls. They whine about wanting a wife, kids etc. and then when they get one they whine about being miserable. Needy, needy, needy.

Bottom line – in Sweden the women act like men and the men act like women.

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George

March 17th, 2011 at 16:30

The swedish girls are the most amazing girls you can ever meet. The express their feelings in a very honest way, however, sex for them is like having a glass of wine sometime, doesn’t matter where or how!!! I always wanted to spend my life with a swedish girl cherishing every moment with her.

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patrick

March 28th, 2011 at 10:45

Nick says:
February 12, 2010 at 21:38
‘This is kind of a chicken and egg argument. As a Canadian, I found Swedish women to be very aloof, unless they were drunk. In that case, they were content to be just another piece of ass. Amazing transition. And despite their air of superiority, most Swedish women will settle for pretty much anyone as a boyfriend. No self-respect at all. So, Swedish women… ‘Looks’ thumbs up! ‘EVERYTHING else’ thumbs down!’

Nick is spot on here:

Having spent much time in Sweden and the Swedish girls I come across elsewhere –

During the day they can be quite arrogant, but once they have consumed alcohol – they do not have any standards and also seem to have taste for middle eastern gentlemen because they believe them to have money..

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Mike

April 2nd, 2011 at 17:07

To be a women yourself you are very quick to empower the mens influence on women and give them the credit for the “change”. You haven`t stopped and wonderd if there might be a chance that this “new prefrence” for swedish women has developed because of changes they themselves has made?

In Sweden, which is one of the most modern, equal and secular societies in the world, it`s more socialy accepted and not frowned upon that swedish women socialize with foreign men. This is something swedish women has embraced and is also a sign of freedom from predjudice and norms. Something that you can`t say about most countries in the world. In the U.S of A you still talk about “interracial couples” and “racemixing”, but it`s the same in the East when they talk about “bloodlines”.

It`s not that swedish men has had their balls removed and become pussies, it`s the women who has liberated themselves from dominant norms and old questionable values. It`s the rest of the world that has lagged behind Sweden, with both their men and women, are in the forfront. If you can`t see that and claim it`s the swedish men who has been nutterd then I can`t help you.

At the same time I don`t think it`s a “new prefrence” that swedish women has built up to foreign men, it`s always been there with the same love as they have for swedish men. It`s just that now when we live in a more liberal soceity that they can show it without beeing socially outcasts. Something women from other parts of the world should strive for. Then again it`s, as you say, only partly true and far from many swedish women prefer foreign men.

But it makes it so much more enjoyable as a swedish man when a swedish women chooses you even tho she has the other options at hand. So we embrace it aswell. And they do, trust me, it`s special!

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Frida

April 2nd, 2011 at 21:40

oh my freaking god! This site describes Swedish girls as some kind of animal, like a breed. “Swedish girls are like this and will appreciate if you do so and that.” how do you know? It’s individual! Swedish girls are some dark skinned while some others are blonde. I live in Sweden, I know what I’m attractive to, and what my friends like. We do definitely not like the very same thing, so please, stop. And this is not a dating server, I’m not sure if any of these girls you’re looking for will nap.

Sorry for sounding angry, but people’s prejudices sometimes make me wanna puke.

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Sapphire

April 3rd, 2011 at 09:10

@Frida – Then what do you like?

@Nick – Do they [swedish women] really “believe middle eastern gentlemen to have money?” I wonder what the wealth distribution is amongst immigrants.

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Mike

April 3rd, 2011 at 14:21

Feel free to comment my post Sapphire, and try not to get to upset about the misspells.

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Sapphire

April 3rd, 2011 at 17:51

Hey Mike, I agree that Swedish women have made tremendous strides in equality compared to other nations. How that works when it comes to Sweden women-foreign women, I don’t have an answer as I really don’t know.

However, with that equality comes a cost. Everything that happens has a cost (positive and negative, called externalities). When women gain more power/income/rights there are benefits and drawbacks. We see as positive externalities: higher education, higher incomes, independence, and so forth. Negative externalities could be: less women at home with the children, more competitive in the workplace, the need for reverse gender discrimination (one person on every public board of directors must be a women), and in my opinion, a certain elemental loss of “being a man.”

For example, you don’t see Swedish men really hit on women at the clubs unless intoxicated. If you’re at the office and someone makes a joke about women, all the women throw a fit, but if you make a joke about people of color/eastern europeans/arabs/chinese, no one complains, most laugh. Of course both types jokes are unacceptable but I see women act aggressively if someone makes a joke that related to women, eg. “Two and half men is the best show ever. I want to be Charlie Sheen; a depraved alcoholic and womanizer.”

I rarely hear the water cooler jokes about genderism but I have heard horrible jokes regarding ethnicity and religion at the office. There’s something wrong with that. Perhaps Swedes don’t understand cultural sensitivity, perhaps men are terrified are making sexist jokes, perhaps people don’t think.

From personal experience, I have never met a Swedish man that has intimidated me but I have met Swedish women who do. They come off aggressive with a bitchy streak. But that’s just my personal experience.

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EricFromSanFrancisco

April 16th, 2011 at 04:41

Okay, alright, you win! But let me say this, I used to live in Minnesota, as well as in Sweden for a numbers of years. All these regions are full of Scandinavians. While it may be true that Swedish girls are prettiest; it is my humble opinion that upper mid-western American girls are not only pretty like their Scandinavian cousins, but also smart like many American girls, and I consider this a huge advantage that our American girls enjoy. So the bottom line is Swedish girls are pretty, American girls are pretty [since the beauty is in the eyes of beholder]. God bless Sweden, and God bless my beloved good old USA.

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Andre

April 22nd, 2011 at 18:41

Hi all there!!!

Hey Sapphire!! this article was so very cool.

Yes, it’s true what you say.

Everybody love blondes… in my case, since I was a child I was so fall in love of a blonde girl of my neighborhood.

I have all need to have success… I am a gentleman first, but with so spicy latin hot blood in my veins…. I love to talk and really I have the balls to go to talk to the most beautiful girl of the night… actually I love to feel the adrenaline when I am walking to she and she is watching me coming to her!!!!

Is funny…. I am from exotic COsta Rica, Central america (not Puerto RIco) and here are amazing latin girls… but not too many blondes…. I dont care about to go to Sweden to find my blue eyes blonde girl of my dreams… I have been in Europe 3 times and I love it!

Again, EXCELLENT article… and really you have a super day!!!

Regards,

Luis Andre

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Frida

April 22nd, 2011 at 22:59

It’s individual of course. You don’t Think every swedish girl is like me, do you? I’m just tired of hearing that “Swedish girls are like this”. I’m also tired of hearing that blondes are stupid bimbos.

I’m not saying that everyone think so, just wanted to express my opinion :-)

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Mario

May 3rd, 2011 at 11:27

Luis Andre from Costa Rica, listen!

Please dont come more to europe man, we cant afford to provide for your non-working ass. Stay in Costa Rica for the love of god.

A piece of advice for you would be: Learn english!

Mario (Born in sweden, has had lots of REAL swedish girls)

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CanadianChick

May 13th, 2011 at 09:55

“(although artificially blond dyed hair)…”

Yes I have noticed this in pictures too. What is with the fake blond hair? It’s like they are trying to live up to their own stereotype or something. Why do they do that?

I know quite a few Swedish Canadians and none of them are blond. It’s not because they are only half Swedish or something either – the ones I am thinking of at the moment are 100% Swedish – and not blond – they don’t dye their hair.

My father is 50% Swedish and was a very blond person but the blondness came from his other parent – not from his Swedish parent who actually had darker hair than the non-Swede parent.

I grew up around a lot of Ukrainian/Russian Canadians as many immigrated here and settled in Alberta and Saskatchewan – many of these people and their descendants are golden blonds.

My family background is full of Nordics (including Swedes) and I have dark hair now.

I do notice that the Nordic background-Canadians tend to have a ‘cool’ almost white blond hair color as children that darkens over time to non-blond ashy color – while the Ukrainian Canadian background here often have golden blond hair that doesn’t darken but turns brassy/more golden with age. Maybe it’s different in the actual countries – but that’s been my observation living in Canada. Another Nordic might pick out my Nordic background – but here in North America – if you aren’t blond – don’t try passing for a Viking at Halloween. No one will be convinced. Being blond is all you have to be to look “Nordic”. That’s the stereotype of Swedes and other Nordics in Canada anyway. Don’t know how true it is.

My guess is that Tourism board of Sweden hands out free bottles of hydrogen peroxide to local women to encourage tourism and fulfill the expectations of male tourists…. ???

Kind of reminds me of how every Canadian airport sells Maple Syrup in gift shops but that if Canadians want to buy real Maple Syrup instead of Aunt Jemima’s flavored corn syrup – locals must also travel to the airport gift shops to pick it up… it’s not readily available on the grocery store shelves…haha fake “Canadian Culture”
I don’t even know what Canadian Bacon is BTW. What is that? I’m told it’s not just regular bacon (which we do have)… That “Canadian Bacon” is similar to ham. I don’t know – I’ve lived here all my life and I’ve never tried it.

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Joar

May 25th, 2011 at 18:59

Hahahaha, I hope you weren’t actually serious when you wrote this, cause it’s hilarious!

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George

June 6th, 2011 at 10:29

I was just offered a job in Sweden. Originally I’m from Europe, and after reading all this stuff I really concider to come and enjoy Swedish ladies :D

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lee gottwald

June 12th, 2011 at 09:22

Beauty is not necessarily blonde.

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Geno tomasso

June 19th, 2011 at 03:08

Believe me gentlemen, I speak from experience. 15 years ago, I married a young beautiful Swedish aupair girl. 15 years and 3 kids later, I have an aging (remember, fair skin ages faster), bitter and not so trim Swedish woman. Angry and argumentative all the time. A word for the wise: have great fun with young beautiful Swedish girls, BUT NEVER MARRY ONE !!!

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Paul

June 19th, 2011 at 10:56

Mike said: “As a Canadian, I found Swedish women to be very aloof, unless they were drunk. In that case, they were content to be just another piece of ass. Amazing transition. And despite their air of superiority, most Swedish women will settle for pretty much anyone as a boyfriend. No self-respect at all. So, Swedish women… ‘Looks’ thumbs up! ‘EVERYTHING else’ thumbs down!”

Mike is absolutely right. People are always going on about how beautiful Swedish women are and all the guys want to come here, etc. That is one of the biggest deceptions of all. It is true that many Swedish women look attractive outwardly but because they’ve been conditioned to be control freaks they will never really let you into their hearts. It is impossible to get passionately involved with Swedish women. They don’t do passion. They do sex but not passion. They are scared to death of the kind of passion which makes you want to give yourself to someone or even to die for them. So they always hold back. Most Swedish girls are screwing by the time they’re 12 (according to all the surveys). But because they’ve been taught from birth that fulfilment doesn’t come through a relationship but only through their job, a man can never get really close to a Swedish woman. She will not let him into her heart. It’s all about physical attraction only. Plus the women here are very opinionated and pushy – imitating the worst aspects of men and totally unfeminine. They don’t know how to behave gracefully. They may dress like women but you can see that they feel uncomfortable with their femininity and walk very awkwardly. If you cohabit with a Swedish woman you will be lucky to get a few years together (or even less) before she becomes bored with you and gets physically attracted to someone else, dumps you and just leaves, no matter how many kids you may have together. Plus that relationship will be one long argument because the women here are so full of themselves, full of anger too if you scratch the surface, and they always think they’re right about everything. It’s no wonder the divorce/dump rate is so high here. By the way, I don’t speak as someone who is bitter because he got dumped by a Swedish woman. These are just my observations. As soon as I saw through it (which was after a few months) I have avoided them like the plague! I have been observing carefully for more than a year. There are plenty of foreigners who have come here to get it together with a Swedish woman and then deeply regretted it. So let that be a warning. Looks are not everything – in fact they should take second place to what is in the heart. Sadly there is little heart in Sweden.

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O'Green

June 19th, 2011 at 15:34

(SORRY! Forgot to close the html-tag up there! /facapalm. I can’t figure out how to delete the comment, but here is one with the correct coding. Really, really sorry, mate!)

Hello there, OP. Having read a few of your posts, there are some points I’d like to raise with you. Right off the bat, I’m going to say that I find much of what you say problematic at best, offensive at worst. I’m not spitting with rage, however, as that would not be very conducive to debate, and I hope not to come off as too acrimonious. As such, I’m going to briefly introduce myself. My name is Tove. I’m 22 years old and studying at university in the United Kingdom. I am Swedish, however, and lived in Sweden until just last year, although, growing up, I also spent a lot of time in various parts of the United States. That’s me – hey, nice to meet you! – and now I’m going to get to the meat of my comment. I’ll warn you right now that it could get fairly long.

I found your blog through – oh, I don’t know, some google search or other; sometimes I like to read about places I’ve been or lived in my spare time – and thought your post on what is acrid and detestable about Sweden was a riot – a laugh riot, that is, and I’m not being condescending in any serious way; I genuinely found it rather entertaining, as satire goes. The comments were … something else, but then, obviously that’s not your fault.

This post, on the other hand, I find blatantly offensive and insulting. I have two questions I’d like to ask of you:

Why do you presume that Swedish women are any kind of a monolithic entity?

Why would Swedish women be any less individualized in their preferences than women of any other?

I don’t know if you’ve ever studied any rigid science, but one of its tenets is that you cannot generalize from a sample size as small as “a few Swedish girlfriends”. Indeed, you might want to ask yourself whether it is ever appropriate to generalize across human beings. Philosophical and ethical conundrums aside, the only way you could truly say that all Swedish women like (X) based on the information gleaned from your “few Swedish girlfriends” would be if that group somehow encompassed the entire female population of Sweden – and I don’t think it does, unless you and I have somehow become bosom-buddies without my knowledge or consent.

Look, it doesn’t matter what your friends like or do not like in this situation. It doesn’t matter what your nationality might be, either, because even if you were Swedish, you would have absolutely no grounds for determining the dating preferences of a completely heterogeneous group of people. I’m Swedish, and I have lots of Swedish friends, and I’d still not be right to say that all Swedish girls go for English boys because my boyfriend is English. Or that all Swedish girls are lesbians because my friend is a lesbian. (That’s anecdotal evidence and not fact, you say? Just like your post, then.)

Or, indeed, that all Swedish girls are blond and beautiful. I’m not going to go into how problematic even “positive” national stereotyping is, but come on, now: you’ve lived in Sweden for a fair bit; surely you’ve noticed that homely or plain-looking women abound just as much as the gorgeous ones? You’re opening yet another can of worms if you begin to equate “gorgeous” to “tall, blond and busty” by the way. Internalized sexism and internalized racism, that is. I’m honestly really sorry if you feel like you aren’t beautiful just because you don’t look like this ridiculous “white ideal of beauty” that’s been touted since forever by those in power.

Another thing – what’s up with your denigration of Swedish women who bleach their hair? Perhaps someone fooled you into thinking we’re all void of pigment up here in the north, and thus you feel gypped? I’m honestly not sure. I will say this: If you’re going to go into the politics of hair, you could claim that it is less problematic for a woman whose natural hair color lies within the blond range (often rat-, ash- or gray-blond) to bleach her hair lighter, than it is for a darker-haired or darker-skinned person to do the same. Why? Because blond shades are generally not part of their range of colorations as determined by their ethnicity, and could thus be viewed as a capitulation to the aforementioned “white ideal of beauty” wherein one will only be viewed as attractive if they conform as much as possible to looking traditionally “white”. (As a side-note, I personally believe that anyone should be able to dye their hair whatever color they like as long as they consciously choose to, much like I make the choice to wear make-up … this is symptomatic of my third-wave feminism however and not something we have time to go into right now – I’m verbose enough as it is; I can only apologize!)

Finally, two points: You use the word ‘feminism’ as a pejorative. Here I’m going to have to quote William Goldman: “‘You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.'” (from “The Princess Bride”) Feminism is not bad, but it is misunderstood. Here is another quote for you, this time from Feminism 101 which attempts to explicate what, exactly, being a feminist entails: “A feminist is, and always has been, anyone who favors political, economic and social equality for women and men … [and] think[s] that people should be judged according to their own unique strengths, abilities and weaknesses … NOT according to what someone else thinks their strengths, abilities and weaknesses ‘ought to be’ because of their gender.” (Emphasis mine.) Do you still think that feminism is an inherently bad construct, one that is “emasculating men” and apparently making them worse partners?

My last point pertains to the final few lines of your post: the implication that all tough Swedish women must necessarily be “soft, delicate women” on the inside makes me rankle. It is absolutely offensive to equate femininity with softness, as though women who are “tough and viking-like” be it on the inside or on the outside, are in any way lesser women than those who are soft and delicate. Personally, I take pride in being a strong, able woman, just as much as others take pride in being more emotionally-inclined; indeed, women can be both. That does not make one of us more female than the other – that’s an absurd idea.

In conclusion, generalizing people like that, be they woman or men, Swedish or American, blond or brunettes – what have you – is completely impossible and, furthermore, potentially endangering or problematic. Obviously, you can just snap back at me that this comment is ridiculous as a response to what essentially amounts to a silly (as in lighthearted rather than vapid) blog post. Still, you posted it in the public sphere and as such all comments are merited: personally, I do think that while you may have intended the post to be playful and a bit jaunty, it gives rise to some real issues and salient points of discussion and debate. I doubt whether you will want to argue those points with me, but there you go, this is my response to what I consider an offensive, problematic post. I like to think the animosity levels were kept relatively low, too. :> If you do respond, I’m really looking forward to reading it.

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Sapphire

June 19th, 2011 at 16:49

@O’Green – Approved the right comment for you. :)

Haven’t been able to read your full comment (it is its own post! bravo) but I will do.

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Lostintheiceandsnow

June 26th, 2011 at 10:49

Yes, I’ve heard that Swedish men are shy, emotionally distant, difficult to figure out and only talk when drunk. When too drunk actually, so you can’t really have a conversation then either. But it’s not an exclusively male trait, I think it’s a Swedish thing in general. Because that’s exactly how I’d describe Swedish women as well.

So I tend to stick to other foreign women. They’re just as pretty and more fun to talk to. If I talk to Swedish women sometimes I feel like a stalker or a freak afterwards. That’s the vibe I get.

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Pswedo

July 1st, 2011 at 13:01

Swedish girls might be attractive, but in my opinion they are amongst the most boring women that I have ever met.

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MedStudent

July 2nd, 2011 at 22:25

looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
you are the bomb :P

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Darlon Shelter

July 3rd, 2011 at 06:40

Guys, I do not know why all this controversy
on Swedish girls. It is true that they live in the cold,
but they are not made of ice.
In my point of view American girls
are more snobbish, especially in relation to
foreigners. They find themselves “up to date” and think
that are beyond his time. I had a proof of this when I visited the U.S.. Maybe I’ve met the wrong girl. Draw their conclusions by themselves, I think you will all agree with me.

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Nathalie

July 9th, 2011 at 01:12

Hey guuys calm down… Some swedish girls is pretty, im a swedish girl and i think u can go around the world and find pretty girls all over, swedish girls isnt special if u ask me. Hugs!

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kams

July 12th, 2011 at 15:06

“Swedish girls, making British girls look ugly since 1488″ is entertaining but as many Brits are descneded from Germans/Swedes/Danes, it’s not really an argument! Several of the girls in that photo could actually be English, looking at their faces.

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Rebecka

July 14th, 2011 at 20:43

I am a Swedish girl and I’m sorry but I think that this dialogue is just dumb shit! Swedish girls aren’t more beautiful than in any other countries!!! Not every Swedish girl is a tall blonde girl with big boops! I’m so sick of hearing that everybody says so!
And there are no guidelines to how a Swedish girl looks and behaves, cause like in every other country they are DIFFERENT FROM EACHOTHER!!!! So please stop talking about Swedish girls like we were an item!

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Marcus

July 15th, 2011 at 08:50

I’m kinda confused, I’m a swedish man and apperantly we have lost our balls to femenism and tight jeans. Losing our balls to femenism kinda doesn’t go along with being emotionally distant and drinking too much does it? Also, we fight allot. And neither me or any of my friends have any pare of tight jeans, thats just gay. Plus swedish guys have the same geenes as swedish women, wich is kinda why swedish guys aren’t that bad looking either.

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Christian Alexander Tietgen

July 21st, 2011 at 22:31

I thought Swedish girls were not very sophisticated because Sweden’s so egalitarian.

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Michael Naretto

August 15th, 2011 at 21:08

I am very much so attracted to tall, beautiful, full figured women and Sweden seems to have an abundance of these physical traits that I crave. Don’t get me wrong, if she is a total bitch then all that beauty is wasted. So have a quirky sense of humor, an open mind and all will be well.

The downside is that I have never been to Sweden. The closest I got was Bavaria Germany. German woman are beautiful as well but I still want to meet some Swedish women. A guy can dream, right?

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L.M.

August 17th, 2011 at 16:21

I love Swedish women. I have personally found them to be extremely beautiful and friendly but somewhat reserved. They don’t give like fools because they don’t have to. Most are educated and independent and let’s face it most men can’t handle that. I have dated several Swedish women so I am going by my experience and my friends experiences. And yes, they were all tall, blue eyes, soft light hair and sweet dispositions. As for the foreign attractions, I guess opposites do attract and maybe that has something to do with it. Also foreign women tend to be more aggressive with white men as they consider them a catch. I have noticed that when I go out for a drink or dinner, all the dark haired foreign women hit on me quite aggressively but the blonder ones don’t. I call it class and decorum, not being cold and aloof. I guess being an old fashioned guy I want to make the first move anyway. And keep in mind many foreign women come here with one purpose in mind to marry a local man. Be wary though that many are submissive and sweet during the courting but after the marriage they become very domineering and controlling. Not to stereotype here but that’s certainly what my friends who married foreigners experienced. They all ended up going back to Swedish girls after a nasty divorce or relationship. All 5 of them. So that says a lot to me and I have chosen to continue my pursuit in that direction of finding myself a nice Swedish girl.

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Lion

August 19th, 2011 at 12:39

lost in Brazil :)

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Daniel

August 25th, 2011 at 15:06

This is useful, I’m trying to date a swedish woman but She is completely different to any girl I have ever dated. This description seems to be about her. Thanks for the info.

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jake12

September 1st, 2011 at 00:46

Wow… what a response to your post. Spans the years and scrolls forever! Well done. May I add to it? Mine is a question. Years back — and by years, I mean early ’90s, a friend and I had a chance to travel to Stockholm. I was much younger (late 20s), single (about a month after a painful breakup), and impressionable (I was knocked out by the preponderance of beauty roaming the Stockholm scene.)

I loved the city and… well, let’s be honest… fell IN love about once every three minutes. We went to one of the clubs and I was so overwhelmed by the number of gorgeous women that I had no idea what to say to any of them. Okay, yes, it’s just as true that at the time I almost never knew what to say to meet women, even though I was/am(?) a pretty decent looking guy, tall, with a decent sense of humor once I got talking.

My travel friend was bolder and he struck up a conversation with a couple girls. I talked enough to one of them that we arranged to meet up for lunch the next day (no, I didn’t have the nerve to try to take it any further that evening, even though — again, total honesty — I would have loved to).

We met and had a decent enough time, but at some point she stopped and asked me if I was just trying to “hook up with a Swedish girl”… and she talked about how so many foreign guys came to Stockholm with that intention. I defaulted to trying to be polite and assured her that I wasn’t all that shallow and that I was really enjoying talking to her (I was)… but I don’t know. I couldn’t get a read on what had happened.

Of course — once more, total honesty — I was a young guy and she was a gorgeous women, among the most beautiful I’ve ever met. To say my interest was purely innocent or intellectual would be a ridiculous lie. And surely, she sensed that. What I couldn’t tell was… did she find find that offensive? Or was she testing me to make a move? I know it was clear to both of us that I was only there for a couple days. So what was she after?

I was a nitwit then. If I were to become suddenly single now, I’d probably be a nitwit today. Most of my girlfriends asked me out before I worked up the nerve to ask them. Pathetic, I know. But to this day, I wonder if I threw away a beautiful if short-lived opportunity.

There’s no way, of course, that you could tell me the answer. Each person, as many have said, is an individual with their own intent. But to this day, I still remember her as a smart and talented (musician), devastatingly attractive, and irresistibly sensual woman… that I may or may not have had the chance to spend a few gorgeous hours with… a long, long time ago.

Ah well. Carpe diem, right? I’m just saying…

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joi

September 2nd, 2011 at 00:25

Hi! I am an albanian residing in NY City. There are about 200000 Swedish -Americans here and I have met some of them. I would say that their physical appearance is stunning. The one I have met were business women or girls. Tremendously successful.I mean they were making in average above a quarter million dollars a year. Because I am blessed with good looks always they were the ones approaching me. Down to earth and smart. Of course I bowed to pressure and married one. She still has relatives in Sweden but I have never been there since my wife was born here. But close where I worked I have seen 3 young ladies from Sweden working in real estate office. Three of them obese, I mean real bottom heavy. Likable faces but strange life styles. I saw them with all kinds of colored primates that reside in New York. I did not know that obesity is a problem in Sweden and if the lifestyle of women in Sweden is like the girls I saw here, its not much to be proud of other than the looks. But again I am happy since my wife outsmarts me in many things. In my house I am the one blond and blue eyes, my swedish wife has light brown eyes, light brown hair.

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Johanna

September 8th, 2011 at 19:45

This was really fun to read! Im a swedish girl, and think that most of the text is true ^^ haha! But, there isn’t just ”tall, blond, skinny” girls in sweden, i mean i’m 160cm that’s not tall XD
Well, sorry if i made some ”spell wrongs” :)
Love Johanna.

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Shane Malas

September 12th, 2011 at 06:11

LOL, I have to say the on-line dating or electronic dating has come a very long way since the days of straight forward chat rooms. A lot more and a lot more people are turning to on the internet dating sites to display prospective dates.

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Anastacia

September 15th, 2011 at 21:18

How weird…I’m half a swedish-half American girl and i don’t really think like that at all. Swedish girls crave alot in looks, when they aren’t always pretty themselves. I’m 5 foot 8 inches, weigh 128 lbs, and im a model- but i don’t ask for much? It’s quite hard to find girls that actually have a nice personality. Most of them always think that they are heartthrobs when they’re actually not pretty at all. It IS true though that most Swedish girls are tall. I find myself tall, but im 4th tallest in class.
Aw well, i respect how generalized this is, but dont get your hopes too high now, guys.

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Luke

September 28th, 2011 at 20:10

Hi all,

Just an observation, I think the fetishising of Swedish women or any other ethnic women is unhealthy. Too me, a preoccupation with a certain ethnicity debases the women or men from your own culture and possibly indicates an inferiority complex. There are beautiful women or handsome men to be found in every country although you might have to look a little harder in some. It seems some of the posters on here are interested in visiting Sweden not for the culture or scenery but for casual sex and hooking up

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Ben

September 29th, 2011 at 09:35

Hey!

This was a funny read! , I’m 22 yr old from England, I worked in Sweden for the last two winters! I’ve absolutly fell in love with the country & the people in general.
I find that the women in Sweden are alot friendlier than the men?
Also the men just seem a little shy & grumpy.
I love Sweden especially the north please someone let me move in ;) haha
[email address redacted]

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Sapphire

September 29th, 2011 at 13:04

Luke – You are right there are some posters who are only interested in hooking up with Swedes (not finding or dating one). I do try to edit or not approve those posters as they do not contribute to the discussion.

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Coleone

October 9th, 2011 at 18:04

Wow….I found this write up and the follow up comments very interesting and somewhat true in most regard…I have to agree to one fact that have been stated here…..I am an African that have been living and studying here in Sweden for a little 3 years now……I have been with all sorts of Swedish girls….blond, brunette, pretty and ugly ones..(Yea not all are good looking)…I have been with more Swedish girls during my stay here than most Swedish men twice my age have…. in fact…I get more of them by accident than most Swedish guys do on purpose…..I usually ask most of them why they end up being with me…and the response is almost always the same…which is that, they like the courage, audacity and balls I show by walking up to them and start chatting them up without have to wait until I am under the influence.

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Sapphire

October 10th, 2011 at 12:35

Coleone – where you normally meet Swedish girls? Bars, clubs, restaurants, on the street??

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jaehong

October 13th, 2011 at 00:42

Funny.. I was searching for some blogs to get info bout the country before I go to visit it this december (or april).. and how could I ignore the “meet a beautiful blonde swedish girl?” part? :)
It is funny to read some of comments–their personal life experience their doubts n so on. But after all, nordic or asian or whatever, wherever they are we/they are all the same! It doesn`t matter how things change, how progress changes the world .. Men are men and women are women. It`s not really about cultural differences..the cultural part has the minimal part on approach. Seriously. I tell you now my little story.
I am south korean and I have been living in italy since I was 7(I just turned 20) and when I was a mid teenage I tried approaches with italian and french girls many times. Never success. Partially because I was shy, but mostly because I was still a stupid adoloscent unmature compared to girls of my age… Until I met my first gf, swede here in Rome when I was 17 (which lasted 1 year n half n broke up cuz of studies/ long distance). If I think about the day when she approached me I still wonder how the hell it was possible. She was tourist, she just approached me, asked me few things, then asked me about me (since I told her I have been living in italy) and stuffs and then she asked me to guide her through Rome. Then we knew each other and eventually things went as it had to go. After her n that event I thought that swede girls were “angels” (like the best women in the world etc).. but NOW I see that`s not true.. The fact she approached me like that was because maybe (i have never been to swe do i dunno yet) girls approaching first was a normal thing in her country.. Here however it`s not. She helped me to break the schemes, way of thinking and break the tradition. The way she first approached it .. If other swe women do this aswell it means they are willing to find a “meeting point” between you and her to start the chat, but after that it`s up to you to use your male charm to seduce her. After all women are attracted to men because we are men and nothing else and viceversa. Roles are not reversed.
However I find extremely unpolite/rude to visit Sweden just for the girls. I mean, WTF? that sounds like philippine/indonesian (I know just generalizing but it happens often so..) moving to my country (korea) to get married with korean men.. My first reaction would be ” get the f out from my country and never come back again you want my money not my love” maybe they will have something similar but instead of money they will think ” you want my blonde hair and blue eyes” ;)
Everyone have it`s own way to be selfconfident ofc.. mine came through the thought of the death… The sentence “Those who cling to life die, and those who defy death live.” funny huh? I hope it helped!
p.s this blog is awesome i just booked hahah i will read more tomorrow! HA DET BRA VI SES!

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Bored

October 13th, 2011 at 09:47

Mike said
“As a Canadian, I found Swedish women to be very aloof, unless they were drunk. In that case, they were content to be just another piece of ass. Amazing transition. And despite their air of superiority, most Swedish women will settle for pretty much anyone as a boyfriend. No self-respect at all. So, Swedish women… ‘Looks’ thumbs up! ‘EVERYTHING else’ thumbs down!”

Then Paul said:
“Mike is absolutely right. People are always going on about how beautiful Swedish women are and all the guys want to come here, etc. That is one of the biggest deceptions of all. It is true that many Swedish women look attractive outwardly but because they’ve been conditioned to be control freaks they will never really let you into their hearts. It is impossible to get passionately involved with Swedish women. They don’t do passion. They do sex but not passion. They are scared to death of the kind of passion which makes you want to give yourself to someone or even to die for them. So they always hold back. Most Swedish girls are screwing by the time they’re 12 (according to all the surveys). But because they’ve been taught from birth that fulfilment doesn’t come through a relationship but only through their job, a man can never get really close to a Swedish woman. She will not let him into her heart. It’s all about physical attraction only. Plus the women here are very opinionated and pushy – imitating the worst aspects of men and totally unfeminine. They don’t know how to behave gracefully. They may dress like women but you can see that they feel uncomfortable with their femininity and walk very awkwardly. If you cohabit with a Swedish woman you will be lucky to get a few years together (or even less) before she becomes bored with you and gets physically attracted to someone else, dumps you and just leaves, no matter how many kids you may have together. Plus that relationship will be one long argument because the women here are so full of themselves, full of anger too if you scratch the surface, and they always think they’re right about everything. It’s no wonder the divorce/dump rate is so high here. By the way, I don’t speak as someone who is bitter because he got dumped by a Swedish woman. These are just my observations. As soon as I saw through it (which was after a few months) I have avoided them like the plague! I have been observing carefully for more than a year. There are plenty of foreigners who have come here to get it together with a Swedish woman and then deeply regretted it. So let that be a warning. Looks are not everything – in fact they should take second place to what is in the heart. Sadly there is little heart in Sweden.”

They are absolutely right. I’ve lived here for almost 20 years, and Swedish women are without passion, *completely* lost in bed, they really don’t understand men (or themselves), and in the end you realize that most of the women bore you to no end. I’ve never been dumped by a Swedish woman; they love the energy and life that foreigners have, but have none of their own to contribute.

As an exception, I have met one that was “free” from her social constraints. Probably should have stuck with her. :)

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Sofia

October 15th, 2011 at 02:12

LOL. It’s really fun to read all comments about us Swedish women. What a turn off to be analyzed like some sort of species, but yet flattering and amusing. Are blondes really that special?

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Swede

October 15th, 2011 at 05:09

How fascinating! I just typed this “google” as a goof and all this popped up. LOL…this is hilarious. Let’s set the record straight…first off, I am of Scandinavian descent, mostly Swedish. I was born in the midwest of the good ole USA; my paternal grandparents were immigrants from Sweden. After college I spent 3 months in Europe traveling, half the time in Sweden and the rest traveling around parts of Northern Europe. I can say categorically, hands down the most beautiful women I encountered were in Sweden. They were natural, fit, educated (for the most part), strong, and sweet. Not trying to sound like a “homer” here, but I’d marry a Swedish girl in a second. Not just for the cultural familiarity, but they’re good women. Leave your sterotypes at the door, fools. This 6’3″ 275lb modern day Viking is attracted to all types of women, but Sweden keeps calling me home. Swedish girls biggest drawback to themselves is they’re too trusting of “exotic” flavors and don’t realize they have good men at home. Am I wrong? Ask Elin Nordegren how things worked out with Tiger (or any other example I could provide). Swedish girls…I love ‘em, and that’s probably why I’m still single after visiting that fair land over 20 years ago. I can’t get them out of my head.

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Maxi

November 15th, 2011 at 15:15

Most of the things here is true, about the girls. I actually thought of all this as bullshit until I actually traveled alot and realized that girls in Sweden actually is the most freaking sexy in the world. But the facts about the swedish dudes, not true. For example: We get more social when we drink(who doesn’t ?), but we are absolutly not incapable of having a conversation. THe only thing here that’s actually is completly true is the look of the swedish people. They are very good-looking, both men and women. And everyone loves to party

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Al Fitzgerald

November 27th, 2011 at 00:27

I would like to share a little bit of my experience when I lived in Sweden.

Two extrem ones:

1. I saw that pretty sweet girl on my first day of uni in one of my lectures.
Many times I noticed her looking at me from a far and sometimes even smile.
But the thing is, everytime I looked at her she looked away and when I smiled back, her reaction was like she was searching some place to hide!
One time we arrive at uni at the same time, she coming from a another direction. I noticed that when she saw me she hurried up a little and opened the door and hold it to me. I smiled and said “tack”, then tried to start a conversation. But she just grew pale and looked like she was scarred of me. So, I just let it all be!

2.I got to know her in a club.
I passed by and smile at her. She smiled back, took me by the hand on the side and started quizzing me about my life and who am I? Then after I certain while talking to each other (and mostly aswering to her questions), she gave me her mobile no. (btw I hadn’t asked by the time, although I had the intent), wrote me her full name in a piece of paper and told me I shoud add her on facebook. Then she gave me like a 5 min french kiss and left home… I was completely puzzled!

I think Swedish girls are quite of an enigma!

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GreekDame

November 29th, 2011 at 06:23

I have always personally found Swedish men to be among the sweetest, cutest men in the world. They aren’t violent in any way and they have a lot of respect for women.

@Geno Tomasso: The way skin ages has nothing to do with its colour. In fact, many fair skinned people
often age slower than olive-skinned people because they take more care to stay out of the sun. (Based on personal experience).

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Beep

November 29th, 2011 at 23:21

What pisses me off is when girls wants me to buy them a drink, they literarily ask me! WTF Make your own money, I did not go to work just to splash my cash on some random girl. I would much rather give it to charity, which I by the way do! One of the most un-sexy things is a women who cant take care of herself. It’s just weak and I would never take a girl like that on a date. I like my girls strong and independent when it comes to money, it shows that in a relationship I can depend on her just as she can depend on me if needed.

This does not apply to friends, girlfriends or girls your dating. Those are people you buy drinks and take care off.

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African dude

December 22nd, 2011 at 10:45

Hi guys,
I would like to hook up with sensible, outgoing, friendly latina/hispanic girls ni Stockholm who might be interested in African guys. Are there any? In case you know any pages, mail lists or forums for latina girls from brazil, mexico, dominican republic, Colombia, etc, in Stockholm please let me know.
I know this relating thing can be a problem, especially when it comes to culture differences, but somethings there is no problem to big to over especially if you know what you want, all you gotta do is compromise, loosen up, lighten up, and live life happily.

African Dude

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ray vasquez

December 25th, 2011 at 01:13

I have a big question, I have heard from all my buddies that when they go to Europe the most delightful and beautiful women are all either from Greece, Italy, Germany, Australia and their personal favorite Switzerland. I am 22 years old about to graduate college I’m 5’11 Dominican descent (Spanish) I weight 185 and have mainly muscle in my body. I have a good heart and a set mind to become successful. I am always afraid to talk to women like these because I am afraid to get rejected for being Spanish and white girls wanting to stick to their own.

My main question is would a Switz girl about my age be attracted to a guy who has these type of characteristics? I am a little tan due to me being spanish I have a body ,a great personality, a good heart, I dance salsa merengue bachata reggae house, techno w.e. is playing but my advantage is dancing and respect. What does a guy like me need to have to conquer and have every man’s dream a switz girl??

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Sapphire

December 25th, 2011 at 10:35

Ray, this site is about Swedish girls not Swiss girls. Can’t help you there.

Though perhaps you should take a mini Europe map with you to not screw up the countries and their women.

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misterx

December 29th, 2011 at 02:51

Interesting article and i can find lot of similarity with Ireland where i live.
I dont like generalisation though but i can see what you mean by that general way and i quite agree. You should copy and paste and post an article about ireland haha
As a French dude i never really knew what all peeps had with those swedish women thingy they not better than any other european women. i think some dudes dream about that blonde cliche which is totally untrue if you go there. Swedish are nice and gentle but nothing beats the kindness and good looks of Filipinas.

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northnexus

January 7th, 2012 at 23:27

@misterx–You’ve got it. Filipinas are the best! I’m man from the Philippines.

Go to the Philippines, and be greeted with smiles, love and kindness!

But I’m in Norway this time..lol

But seriously, Filipinas are good looking, flexible and family oriented.

And one more thing, I would like to ask, are Swedish women(in some particular) change

its trait, and adopt for more stable relationship in life? And be flexible enough for the

sake of family and children?

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Scee

January 21st, 2012 at 22:21

My Swede is nothing like what this article describes Swedish men to be…maybe because he is in the USA now with a woman who appreciates and loves him with all my heart? Perhaps Swedish girls are so spoiled they don’t deserve their sweet, shy, wonderful men… :-) S’ok with me, he’s mine! lol

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mikaela

January 22nd, 2012 at 17:45

Haha I found this post so amusing!! Lots of what is written is true about Swedish men and Swedish women. I’m a Swedish girl but I grew up in California, New York, and the UK so everyone says I’m a little different than the full-blown Swedish woman. Whenever I visit though, I always find it refreshing. For example, Swedish men don’t seem to be as crude and cocky as lots of Americans (no offense!) – living in New York for 4 years, I got sick of men whistling and saying things like ‘Hey baby, you want some of this?”… no, I don’t.
Luckily though, I have found a nice balance. I have my wonderful Swedish boyfriend from Uppsala and he’s so sweet. I think Swedish boys are like eggs – best analogy I could come up with. They have a hard shell exterior, but when you finally crack it, all the gooey lovey stuff comes out :) and I like that about Swedes.

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Ramunas

January 29th, 2012 at 20:27

It’s a bit funny.
Coz my girlfriend is learning Swedish language and thinking move out from our country to Sweden. Thanks god I’m freemind about the swedish guys. :) starting worried about girls out there

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msy

January 30th, 2012 at 10:37

I’m off to stockholm next week. hopefully it lives up to my expectations. i dunno what it is but i’ve always found blond, blue eyed/green eyed women attractive.

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Antonius

February 1st, 2012 at 21:28

Hi, im from sweden and actually i don’t drink to get wasted i only drink for the taste and such.
And yes i am very shy i just really dont know what to say its very enoying hehe.

Sorry for my english! :)

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Z

February 3rd, 2012 at 01:46

I feel like the list you made of what Swedish girls want/like men to do is what an real man is supposed to do when going after or courting any girl from anywhere lol. Especially on the first few dates you have to have a good personality, show some chivalry, and be willing to pay the bill and not be a cheap ass. Idk that may be just me, but I’m from the States and I’ve traveled the world and all that holds true anywhere. I just find it funny that any dude would think that that list is ridiculous or think, “damn, how do Swedish men and women mate and have lots of babies?” like you stated because uhh its kinda obvious that you have to do such things, and be able to hold a conversation, not be a pushover, have some courage etc etc. if you want to get anywhere with any girl. Idk Is it me or is that not just common sense when it comes to trying to get a girl or even simply trying to make friends?

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Roger

February 3rd, 2012 at 15:32

Talking to a friend of mine recently who lived in Sweden. He said sex is easy to find, but love is not.
Apparently if you meet a women in a bar, if the conversation is going well after a few drinks, it’s perfectly fine to say ‘you’re cute, let’s go back to my place.’ I’m told they prefer that instead of, “let me get your number, or let’s have dinner sometime.” I wouldn’t be that up front with an American women due to the inherent “I’m not a slut” mechanism developed from our Puritan ancestors. But with a Swedish woman, should I be that forward? I’m going out with a Swede tomorrow, who’s visiting the states for a few months, and I’m simply looking for something casual.

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lh

February 3rd, 2012 at 20:59

Z, I completely agree with you!

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juan

February 15th, 2012 at 03:35

i red this artucle and i felt sa sad to hear the description of swedish women because 5 years ago icame with my father to scandinavia on vacations only for see all these beatifull blonds.and in the end i got sa diissipointment.
i dont have any opinion about swedish women im just gonna write what has happened to me after 4 years being in sweden;

swedish women nver accepted me when i came to talk( i tryied english ,spanish and even swedish)

they never accepted when iwanted to pay (they think im buying them)

they never accepted when i tryied to help them as a gentleman(they say :thank u ,but i manage myself)

they nevr accepted me when i wanted to dance(they dance with their friends girls instead)

they never accepted me when i showed my feelings(they erase your name from the mobile if tell them that u like them)

tehy never accepted me when ishowed that i have intress in them(the feel disturbed if u are sa interested)

they dont give a shit where u comming from they can have sex with anyone if they are drunk ,but the day after they are not gonna say hello to u(.i got kiked out from their appartments many times the day after)
they are sa beatifull and they smell sa good.

i have big balls ,im a stripper, i use to say the things face to face but i reakized that is not working with swedish girls. they prefer somoeone who doesnt say to much sa can be easier to control.

i got married with a swedish women but she never accepted me in sweden, she falled in love with me in southamerica when she visited me after i left sweden.2006. we where together 5 years ; now we are divorced and became best friends , she said to me one day:

juan u are rigth in what u are saying about uss.
we are afected by the femenism.we dont know how to accept a good man.

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Sapphire

February 15th, 2012 at 11:59

@Juan – May I give you some insight on why you do so poor with the ladies?
1. Your English is terrible. Please learn grammar, spelling, punctuation and capitalization. Regardless of your native language and your English writing skills, you can at least not be a total lazy ass when it comes to capitalization.

2. Your comment “i have big balls ,im a stripper, i use to say the things face to face,” is probably the dumbest, most sexist, chauvinistic, creepy comment you could say to the opposite sex. Why the fuck would a lady want to know your ball size?

3. If your English writing skills are as poor as your communicative skills, I wouldn’t blame anyone for not wanting to talk to you.

Best, Sapphire

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lh

February 15th, 2012 at 23:35

hahhaha gosh I love reading these posts! Best study break from biochemistry ever! yay! Saphire, you rock!! you tell them how it is!! hehe :)

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Yan

February 17th, 2012 at 03:19

Sadly, for some posts i have seen, chilvalry is only considered as such if it means you are burning an outrageous sum on the woman, or acting as a bag carrier/cry shoulder at her convenience. I’ve never been in Sweden, although I would like it, for the quality of teaching. But having seen some posts here and on other sites too, and personal accounts, I would never would go to Scandinavia after women. I have some girl friends who went there and married native men, the second marriage for these men, the first was with native women, and did not last long. And when married women from outside, these guys acted as if they were people who had never eaten a good meal in life. These girl friends have a hard time to fit in, because there are many women there who act like men and are upset by women who want to act like women, as if they want to be sex toys for men or something.

Feminists understand nothing about men. Any woman worthy of own salt knows that a guy can be displeased with a woman and not want more meetings (or vice-versa), but still pay the bill as a matter of chivalry. A man wants a relationship, not to drag a bag, so if he’s going out with you is certainly not because he considers you inferior, but because he at least thinks you can walk together with him unless you prove him wrong. If you will be writing the score of who pays more bills, you are not proving your independence (or maturity), you’re competing to see who has the biggest ****, and a woman who behaves like that irritates a man quickly; only brats or childish men compete that way. If you scorns small kindnesses, but thinks that spending large amounts of cash is chivalry or proof of love, do not be surprised If your boyfriend dismiss you as being a coin digger. It’s very insulting to think that a guy who does something to you wants to indebt or buy you, and you know it very well, because you do not have the courage to speak this on his face, knowing that the guy will never want to look at you face again.

Be a feminist or whatever, is not an excuse for not learning other philosophies of life aside from their own. Only narrow minded people act this way. And while there is all the talk of equality, feminism is a movement not so different from French or Russian revolution. People who are the core of the movement believe that have the best point of view, and want to take down whoever is in charge and take his place.

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Nils

February 17th, 2012 at 10:26

Thanks for this good post. Now my foreign girlfriend used YOUR comment about that Swedish girls dosent even want to be with Swedish men, against me!

Made my day…

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Heidar

February 17th, 2012 at 12:09

Sadly, as a male living in Sweden, I find myself unable to disagree with anything in Yan’s post (except possibly for the picking up women in Scandinavia bit; while the militant feminism movement has spread all over Scandinavia, its hold isn’t nearly as strong in the other countries as it is in Sweden, so the “other” Scandinavian women are more tolerable and tolerant by-and-large compared to Swedish women).

I think I speak for all (or all the non-racist, anyway) Swedish men when I say to foreign women: please, PLEASE immigrate here! We’re basically dying from a lack of womanly affection over here!

…The really sad part is I’m not exaggerating. *Sigh*

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Andrea

February 20th, 2012 at 19:36

From my experiences traveling to Sweden, I don’t find the woman there to be any more beautiful then anywhere else. Sure there are lots of beautiful people, but there is everywhere! I found most of them to be over weight. I have been dating a Swedish guy, and I am still trying to figure him out! After reading your blog, I understand him a bit better…..I thought maybe he was never taught to open doors for people, and when I got nothing for Valentines day, I was very dissapointed….but now I realize it may just be a cultural difference. He is absolutley clueless when it comes to woman and dating! Also I had to make the first move on him…it was like he was afraid of me.

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Johan

February 21st, 2012 at 11:39

wow heidar ur so right , feminism in Sweden has gone overboard its like they want,need more controll than men just to make up for centuries when they didnt have it , And for me its quite obvious that someone with bigger mouscle power gets more pay in a muscle based work anyone disagree?

and for the “swedish woman prefer foreign men ”

Foreigners in this country like to flash stuff like newlyrich when they come over here , they live in cheap suburb complexes and then buys a merc or bmw to drive around in , Swedish GIRLS loves this cuz of their friend and all its a popularity thing . and i would say its mostly about girls in school or straight out of college.

They pretty quickly change their mind though when they finally figure out the game and good for them that swedish men are understanding and forgiving about past and smarter with money considering wellfare isnt a new thing in sweden . Its like yeah we might drive a volvo and i guess for the outside eye that doesnt look very flashy but then again the volvo dude probably have a big fat house , stabil economy and ready for family , you think the bmw guy has that? nahh they have 2 familys living in 2 bedroom apartements so they can afford keep up apperance when out flashing . So ill take my chanses with my volvo . Atleast i know i dont have a golddigger on my hands, wich may be another reson to why swedish men holds back on the cash for the woman … just to see who holds out and dont just want the flash. This is what i think . And trust me im a bartender in this country ! have to agree on some of the cons though swedish men really go out to get smashed when they go out and sometimes its not pretty . Since we raised the price of redbull in our bar where i work and lowered the alcohole price all of a sudden there are just swedes in the bar again funny eiigh !

you could say foreign men in sweden is womans quickfix they “all” end up with swedes eventually . Im in the hospitality industry and i see this stuff everyday .

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Johan

February 21st, 2012 at 12:02

And it comes without sayin if you can eat the cookie for free why pay for it ?

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Jarom

February 21st, 2012 at 22:46

Gee this site has been posting since 2010
My family has a swedish background i may not be a fully swedish but i have swedish traits. i dunno why i adore swedish girls but its mainly got to do with blonde hair and blue eyes, in which i have but a brown blonde. I been looking into chatting to a swedish girl since yesterday cause i learned about whats happening guys taking on old genetics. You swedish girls are very beautiful and soo nice ive heard about the marriage rates it seems love over there is a lost meaning.

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Jarom

February 22nd, 2012 at 00:15

im sorry 2009

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Yan

February 22nd, 2012 at 00:18

@Heidar wow dude, this racism stuff still surprises me a little. We imagine these annoyances have already been overcome in more developed societies, but figures… But even things being bad for you, I think women still take the worst. They are crippled by the system since children, and go through life trying to prove independence and superiority to a male population that does not give a damn for it. Their refusal of kindness and attempts to approach leads to a pathological individualism. If foreign women really began to immigrate there, they would be in serious trouble, because they have no chance of competing with feminine women who are not afraid to give and receive affection (sex is not any advantage, any woman can do). Most will die unloved in their comfort zones.

@Andrea Don’t blame the poor dude. Things work differently for them. What here is considered chivalry and kindness, there is considered chauvinistic behavior. The women there interpret this as you treating them as invalid, or is trying to indebt them or buy them somehow. He has no way of knowing that you will not freak when he opens the door for you, or pull the chair for you sit down. And he probably also fear you try to control and manipulate him. You will have to be open and honest with him about what you like or dislike.

@Johan Seriously man, understanding and forgiving? Do you think any woman give the slightest for that? They will go overboard all they want, and when tired or about to acquire a not-so-very-respectable fame, will seek a random loser for maintainer and play the respectable lady of society. Even if you refuse them, rest assured they will not cry one night about it, because there are several others to go after. And that goes for any woman of loose morals in the world, apparently, for the Swedish as well.

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Heidar

February 22nd, 2012 at 07:03

@Yan
Actually, my whole point was that foreign women (generally speaking, of course), unlike Swedish women, ARE able to give and receive affection, meaning that if they come to Sweden they would have a huge advantage over Swedish women. I think you may have read my point backwards or some such :P

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Yan

February 22nd, 2012 at 16:47

@Heidar
No man, I understood what you meant. My point is that Swedish women are not bad people indeed. They are victims too, although they do not see it that way, and who has to put up with them for years and years also probably will not see it that way, too.
Believe me, the brazilian women are in great majority cheerful and adorable, but if you infuriates them, they can be worse than the swedish.
If I could I would marry a woman from Eastern Europe. I have talked to some, and they like to be independent, are educated, at ease with life, and far less spoiled than their western cousins (Americas included)??. What they ask is being treated with respect and dignity, but a guy who does not do this for any woman, is certainly an idiot who doesn’t deserves female companionship.

My advice would be do not expect a woman to immigrate there, start chatting around the internet and see if you find someone interesting. And then keep talking. Not everyone has money to be traveling around the world often, but finding someone somewhere that is worth fighting for, maybe one of you need to make only a single trip. :-)

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Heidar

February 22nd, 2012 at 18:01

@Yan
Actually, If you read my other posts on the subject here on the site (but not necessarily in this particular thread) you will know that I am very much aware of many of the Swedish women being victims too; that it has not been brought up in this particular thread is not a sign of ignorance by any means.

I have no personal experience with Brazilian women, so I will refrain from commenting on them.

My appeal to foreign women to immigrate to Sweden was not an “expectation” in any way, shape or form; it was merely an appeal based on the general “romantic” situation in Sweden, with no attached personal wants or desires; essentially a form of encouragement to those foreign women frequenting this site who are “on the fence” as it were; given the purpose of this site, entirely logical regardless of my own personal feelings or individual situation. Please, I ask you do not read into things that which is not there; Freudian psychoanalysis was disproven decades ago, after all.

Have a nice day.

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Yan

February 22nd, 2012 at 22:28

@Heidar

Sorry, no offense was intended.

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lh

February 22nd, 2012 at 23:04

haha chill guys!

Anyway, Heidar, thanks for your posts. I actually took a picture of the first one (about encouraging foreign women to immigrate to Sweden) and messaged it to many of my girlfriends in college! they all want to find internships/jobs in Sweden now! haha

Have a great day everyone!!

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Heidar

February 23rd, 2012 at 10:36

@Yan
None taken :)

@lh
Most excellent! :D

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Jarom

February 23rd, 2012 at 13:11

None Taken Heidar ;)
Nice Job Lh :)
Sorry for being random i should of read into what was going on haha :P
So how’s sweden haha :)
Im just start the convo fresh i don’t know where to start lol ;)

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Jarom

February 23rd, 2012 at 13:22

:)

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lh

February 26th, 2012 at 08:42

I saw this in satw, and it reminded me of the past conversations:
http://satwcomic.com/shop/bend-over-poster

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Estelliane

February 26th, 2012 at 12:49

@Heidar: Sapphire’s blog and my recent discovery of Sweden have pushed me over the edge! I have decided to move to Sweden :-)

P.S. I am a foreugn woman

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Jarom

February 26th, 2012 at 21:27

Haha bend over for womans rights funny pic it’s relavent alright :)
Good work Heidar someone foreign is coming over

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Manish

March 2nd, 2012 at 22:49

For years, I’ve been thinking to go to Sweden, but never did it. I live in the US and had some personal life changes that happen to me. I’m a music producer and love to play live would that attract some Blondes my way? I’m a Desi and a Vegetarian…

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Anthony

March 3rd, 2012 at 03:32

Hello ya’ll!! i am from the USA and i have a great interest in Swedish women! the first ever Swedish woman i have ever talked to was over Twitter she sings for a metal band and since she was the first Swede i ever talked to i find they are very nice people and kool!! i need some help on something what do Swedish women think of Americans? and musicians? me being one playing bass ;) haha! i have Swedish blood in my veins so i have traits of the Swedish i am 6′ 3″ tall blue eyes and brown hair and pretty shy and dont talk much but when i do like Swedes it is short and to the point!! i am 19 btw! i have grown more fond of Swedish women as times goes on!! i like that Swedish women are strong i find it really kool!! and they will ask a guy out! or so i have heard? lol well peace out for now!!! \m/

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Phineas

March 4th, 2012 at 06:58

Hello all!
I met a Swedish girl last week and I thought she was 21 but she turned out to be much older. I was amazed because she looked amazing! I never would have thought she was the age she was. This was my first time going out with a Swedish girl and she is very tall and beautiful. I was pleased that she was so nice and down to earth. When the bill arrived she offered to pay half, but I payed for it because it is the man’s duty to pay for the first date. It’s refreshing to go out with a girl who has traditional values and not the baggage that American girls have. Hopefully, we will go out again and she can stay in the U.S. with me. :)

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freetruth

March 9th, 2012 at 12:27

Dated swedish women in the US. They have some type of inferiority complex: ‘my culture is this and this’ is their comments most of the time. They don’t seem to know what they like beyond what their village likes. To the moronic commentator above, I love women in the US because many are strong and there is diversity of thought. I hope we don’t go back to cavemen days. I understand the guys frustration, because independent women many times go for surprisingly superficial guys. But some do mend their ways. Others end up in the regret lane later in life… But that is not all women by any stretch.

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rawr

March 13th, 2012 at 08:02

Every comment here is a generalisation or just uses one to back up their argueement. “American girls are strong and diverse”, “Swedish girls are beautiful”, “Swedish girls like this and that”. Rididiculous!

Like every culture, individuals are individuals. There are attractive and unattractive girls in every country: both in looks and personality. Some US women are diverse, some are not. Some Swedish girls enjoy paying for the bill, others do not — like anyone!

The amount of people here who have dated or spoken to a pretty Swedish girl and fallen in love with her, then commented here that all Swedish girls are more beautiful than American, or Australian, or any others, is plain stupid. Grow some brains as well as some balls people.

What the issue at hand should be is — how can a US-Indian girl write a post on what Swedish women like about Swedish men? And why are people so STUPID?

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Sapphire

March 13th, 2012 at 12:11

@rawr – I didn’t realize there was a law against a US-indian person writing about Swedish women. Did I miss something?

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lh

March 14th, 2012 at 01:59

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA I cant stop laughing, this is so good (and a great break from cell bio, i must add) anyway, yeahhhh how dare you, sapphire, express your opinions in the internet!!! all opinions should be censored! XD

anyway, jokes aside, rawr, chill, let us have some fun with stereotypes :P
we can call this blog an outsider’s ethnographic exploration of Swedish culture… or something of the sort :)

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Yan

March 14th, 2012 at 18:16

I thought that by having the option to post comments, people were allowed to comment. LOL

Opinions differ and of course that will have people who will not like some. But what is the problem of finding the swedes more beautiful than american ones? I find romanian women beautiful, and by far more pleasant that swedish and american. Problem? Taste is particular, each has its own. And it certainly does not mean that I think all the american and swedish women are ugly, or autocrats and self-serving. The problem with people who take themselves too seriously is that they end up offended for any little thing.

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Dean

April 25th, 2012 at 08:46

i don’t see them as sluts one bit. i have met a few and there great!! in which are like most women or ladys out there.however you talk about how much balls a man has?? in my opinion …i see how far will i take it?…… do i want to go to jail or go home? insted of hurting people and myself i choose a more “civil” idea. in which is not harming others or myself.
im “american” im shy …. givin the situation. maybe ya should give the swedish men more credit. you and others have no idea whats going through there head.maybe that man wishes to respect you in matters of maybe crossing bondries…. who wants to do that on top of who wants to put themselves in a situation they may potentualy not want to be in.. anyhow i see your point and it makes sense to me. i wish the best for you and others!! keep looking its right around he corner.

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Kris

May 3rd, 2012 at 10:08

Hey!, Sweden is a pretty beautiful country in terms of Site Seeing.. from one angle i guess >-<
I've been living here almost 2 years now with a Swedish woman. I moved to Örnsköldsvik, Sweden from Trinidad & Tobago with the hopes of stabilizing myself in both Engineering work and in a relationship ..
From the drop point of view, the Swedish women ive met here are shy to start conversations and generally let the men do most everything from work to playing with the kids. My woman hardly has any conversation with me unless i initiate it and it deathly afraid to try anything new. Passive is what comes to mind.. The women i know here over 26 + years find their guys mostly on dating websites and the statistic was that most failed at that particular date found on the internet (Swedish date). So far i've felt like the relationship really lacks feeling and affection as get more hugs and kisses from my Mother when i visit her in the Caribbean than from my Swedish Girlfriend and the other women i know here (when those women are with their guys, the guys always initiate the affection and complain about lack of motivation to push further).
I've seen girls from the age of 16+ having kids and dropping the father so they can be on their own, It really crossed me that the women here enjoy being single parents. You gotta live here to realize it. its either that or the guys are all douche-bags.
I really think the Engineering work environment here is satisfying, so many things to work with and learn from and top class education =D ..

I achieved my dream of becoming a Hydraulic Engineer in Europe ..and i did it before i got to 25 years of age =P .. But relationship wise .. i really think its harder to have one with a Swedish woman.. than with one from a foreigners native country or otherwise. .. Unless you just want sex ;)

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Kris

May 3rd, 2012 at 10:13

P.S a couple times i really thought about packing up and leaving, but in my mind its still a challenge and i should tough it out to see a better side of the relationship ..or just have a better person hit me in the future and go with the flow.. Success should be synonymous with sacrifice.. but what if you sacrifice too much time and you lose the critical period to get the person you thinks flawless and create something amazing .. something like a family of your own..

Just from someone who is pondering success and how far to go to have both positives in work ..and in a relationship.

..If im wrong, i’d really like to hear your opinions.

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lh

May 5th, 2012 at 06:35

I used to think that this coldness/reservedness was characteristic of “Scandinavia” in general, but I met a few Norwegian girls this summer who were super fun, outgoing, and warm towards their boyfriends. So maybe try Norway?
Has anyone else noticed this difference? (or it might just be these particular Norwegians I met, after all, they were in an exchange program in the US, so that by itself may speak of their personalities).

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Steven Parker

May 14th, 2012 at 09:54

For posting the picture with the “oh so cute” subtitle about my countrywomen looking ugly, erm, there are bad looking Swedish women as well you know. And why pick on us? I doubt you composed the picture, but it comes across as a bit racist.

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Soes

June 7th, 2012 at 09:00

Hi there! Well, thanks for posting this! I had a really good laugh, and yeah, basically it’s true. Most Swedish women are tired of the guys that think that girls should bow before their “almightiness” and be superhappy just to become one of their acquaintance … And all the other guys…. the nice guys… are all friendzoned because they don’t dare to talk back to you in fear of losing you.

So what does that leave us with, a good-for-nothing guy or a guy that wont speak up?
No wonder so many Swedish girls get married to Italian men.

But again, thanks for your blog. It’s hilarious, so keep it up!
Sincerely, Soes from Scania

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Copernico

June 14th, 2012 at 14:40

Hello there.
I’m italian and I found that swedish girls and women are really a different story from other country.
I like so much your country for he respect of nature, freedom and contact with life that can not be found even in most western countries. And so also is reflected in women (and men).

I dont know why, maybe it’s their culture of freedom, outside, they can look different from many other. But i felt in love with one, and I liked her so much since the very first moment. She meant to be stressed and teased by men but not valued like she was before: a gorgeous woman.
Now, every woman from every part of the planet deserves to be treated as woman, not a toy to use after or during a drunk. She deserves to be afriend, communicative, cuddles, maybe sometimes to be angry but never lacked of respect. That seems to be very common in Sweded, I dont say every sweden male treat badly a woman, but a lot of them especially younger generation are lacking of sensibility.
And from my point of view, it’s weird…
Now my story with that sweden girl went over not because there was not lack of love from both, but because my work, I was deployed so far away, and I was younger at that time.
What remains to me is a big funny happy sweet moments of warm wool and big heart, here in the deep of Italy. Still running all my love for swedes. Nobody is perfect, but the sweden males that I known, needs to grow in empathy and care with their women. at least.

PS: drinking to getting mandatory drunk is for idiots. Drinking and eventually getting drunk from time to time to enjoy life and company is better life. And life is made of many small things.

Cheers

Just my 2c.

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sofia

June 18th, 2012 at 16:55

I have lived in Sweden for a while and I think the boys there are much more beautiful than the girls. My ex was Swedish and I totally loooove Swedish guys, they are the best in the world =)

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prem

July 10th, 2012 at 12:16

Does the post include Asian guys too? Just wondering!

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beautyboy

August 1st, 2012 at 16:30

this is how i see it.. im south asian bangladeshi 5’11 intelligent, ambiiotious.. denounced my faith islam and non-religious.. born in uk.. brits are ugly and evil.. so thats why i need to move.. i never had a gf and im 23.. but im going to be a multi-millionaire someday… and i realised family is number 1… i dont plan on ever being married because on pre-nuptual agreement we have to agree who gets what in case theres a divorce… well i want to keep what i earned… now i was thinking of moving to sweden or serbia to search for someone but apprently swedes mate before they date.. then go out on a date pretending not be a date (something called fika).. now why would i choose someone who’s been with several guys??? and throws themselves at foreigners because theyre liberal and it’s ok for them to do this??? swedish girls are beautiful becasue the vikings stole the most beautiful women to be their wives… moving on quickly… i was also thinking of serbian women.. serbians are in general taller, wider, more meaty, and look and act like models comapred to swedes… but serbian women are orthodox christians.. and serbians are hostile towards foreigners and serbian hoooligans/nationalists can be violent :(

so i thought why not move to california nicest part in america.. and maybe find someone there… serbian or swedish… they’ll be more educated and more liberal thinking.. another plus you dont need to learn swedish or serbian

so thats what i plan to do now
email me damnid at live dot co dot uk

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Sapphire

August 8th, 2012 at 12:43

@beautyboy – HAHAHAHA. You want a liberal, educated person in California that is a virgin and you don’t want to get married? Wow, you sound like a real catch.

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beautyboy

August 8th, 2012 at 13:18

i was born on the year of the dragon 1988

im going to sue nhs for medical malpractise..

this year is 2012… year of the water dragon… where there is lots of financial gains for dragons…

i only connected things together..

A lot of people in Cali are trashy in Southern areas. I never said I’m looking for Virgin o_O

You don’t need to be married to show their love for each other.

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Sapphire

August 16th, 2012 at 21:28

@beautyboy – You implied virgin when you said this, “now why would i choose someone who’s been with several guys???” So, then you’re okay with someone who’s been with several guys?

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JoeA.

September 5th, 2012 at 19:09

I tried to post a few profiles on the popular ” Montesplaten” swedish dating site. That’s been recommended as one of the more popular and serious singles sites in Sweden. The impression I got though is, if you are a foreigner. Their site monitors who screen potentioal users are unwilling to accept your profile submission. They send you a message that your bio presentation isn’t serious and acceptable for their site. Particularly, if it’s writtenin english, and if your photo 400X500 isn’t
attractive etc.

Yet those presentations 2-line biogs submitted by Swedes are okay.

What makes things worse is, the entire site has no english version. And the subcription can only be paid via credit cards issued in sweden or scandinavia.
I had 4- profiles deleted already with no explanation from the monitors who oversea this website. So the 2-hrs. spent filling in a bio in swedish for each of these trashed profiles was a waste and all for nothing etc.

I’m very disappointed by they way Montesplaten operates their site.

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Ed

September 15th, 2012 at 06:52

Come on! Dating is not a sport, if you think it is thats probably where you are going wrong. Find someone nice who likes you, thats all. If someone is not interested in you then its not because Swedes are hard work its because they are not interested in you. Move on to someone who is or make yourself more interesting. Swedes look at each other, you, they linger with stares. It couldn’t be easier than to approach a Swede.

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Charlie

September 19th, 2012 at 06:21

Wow im from sweden, or at least my parents tell me I am…. christ I dont feel this way at all, fuck being cheap … worst thing i know u only live one time, live everyday like its ur last, laugh until ur crying blood and go crazy 24/7 and dance and party like there is no tomorrow and have fuuuuuun seriously fuck cheap people uhhhh and whats there to be afraid to talk about? Don’t get it…. must have met the wrong kind of swedish guys ….

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Anders Mikael Clausen-Oxenstierna

October 5th, 2012 at 03:47

I am Swedish and need to chime in at this point. There is nothing wrong with Sweden as it is one of the most Utopian nations in the world. The women are beautiful. And I have lived throughout Europe and a few other continents so far and the women outside of Sweden are on average not as comparably attractive because their facial features always have something that is out of adjustment whether it be the nose, chin, teeth, etc. But, the Scandinavian countries along with Sweden do not seem to have this genetic pattern of facial features not lining up symmetrically and aesthetically. If you envy us so much that you hate our women for their looks at least have the courage and guts to abstain from underhandedly double talking points so you contort your rhetoric to sound like the problem is with women you do not know instead of you.

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Anders Mikael Clausen-Oxenstierna

October 5th, 2012 at 04:03

Joe. A, Mötesplatsen sounds like they had valid reasons to reject you. I am assuming that you do not live in Sweden or Scandinavia. And because you do not you are in essence just jerking people around who want to find dates and relationships. How are you going to date Swedish women if you do not live in relative vicinity to it? Hop on your personal supersonic Gulfstream jet and skip over to lunch with them in Stockholm or Göteborg every day?

I understand it is good fun to chat with Swedes, but Mötesplatsen is legitimate dating site that is seeking to keep their client base happy. Letting foreigners in to flirt with women who will never be able to meet them, and in the scenario in which you do decide to meet them requires either you to ask her to fly to you or you to fly to her is the type of thing that annoys people and causes the loss of clientèle.

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Ayanda

October 6th, 2012 at 14:01

Well. This was a nice short article.

I only have this to say. I’m South African, Zulu Male. And I wouldn’t mind dating a Swedish lady. In fact, I don’t know anything about the country, but this article has me interested experiencing a Swedish woman. The way I see it, its Viking Woman meets Zulu Warrior. Two strong qualities that are bound to make Beautiful Babies… Lol.

But on a serious note. I’d love to marry a Swedish Lady.

Thanks Sapphire

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Nkosazana

October 6th, 2012 at 20:52

Oh mighty zulu warrior, this zulu princess knows that zulu warriors can’t deal with spoiled Swedish women ;)

Oh the babies are super cute, i got 3.

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Ivan

November 14th, 2012 at 07:56

Hello,

Thank you for the information, it was a great insight! I have a question, I am a 40 year old Latin man, though I look much younger (People think I am 29 … yay) But really I live in Fresno, California, the dating prospects in my area are very poor (And I am being polite), and if the girl happens to be okay to look at (Not even good looking), then she becomes unapproachable and difficult to interact with.

I figured if I am going to be turned down by a woman let it be by a beautiful one; therefore I would like to move to Sweden and try the dating scene there, keep in mind that my ultimate goal is to get married and start a family with as many children as possible, or three at least! (I am not getting any younger) Would I be able to accomplish that in Sweden? Thank you.

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Sapphire

November 15th, 2012 at 16:27

@Ivan – I suggest you move out of Fresno to another city in California. Moving to Sweden to find a woman is adding more complications than benefits.

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Ivan

November 17th, 2012 at 05:36

Thank you for your prompt response! However, I was disappointed by the answer, what do you mean”more complications than benefits.”

Let me add that I have lived all over Cali, more than a decade in San Diego, another decade in San Francisco, and about the same time in Fresno.

And what I have found out is that all over the State women have one thing in common, drama, what I am saying is that if I ever leave Cali it would be to go to a different country where women have a different mentality that is drama free, and they are “less” superficial, and most of all honest. Do Swedish girls share those traits? Thanks again.

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Biochemist

November 21st, 2012 at 22:07

I’d just like to share my views on the subject, since I’m a blonde woman born and bred in Sweden. I was very blonde as a girl, so are most of the children here. The hair then gradually goes darker, so many women start with highlights to feel young and unchanged by age. Besides, the weather here’s so bad, we need a bit more sun ;-) !

I’ve been hit on by all sorts of foreigners, and I usually try to avoid conversing with them at all because they have that leering look and seem to think I should jump into bed with them immediately due some sort of genetic imprint. Thank God I could walk up to and talk to my own man that I’ve married and been with for the past 15 years. And for the record, he didn’t try any lines with me the first time we spoke, but actually followed my conversation in Philosophy and assumed that I had a brain.

I have enough of a challenge keeping peace with my British husband concerning cleaning and cooking (we take turns cooking or buying takeaways and hire a cleaner otherwise we would divorce), so I can only warn men coming from other cultures that Swedish women find a lot of self-worth in working and earning a wage and do not fancy becoming someone’s cook or cleaner in the evening. If you marry a Swedish woman and settle in Sweden you will be expected to share parental leave and picking up at daycare when you have kids. Saying that though, my husband has not taken hardly any parental leave at all, but his other British friends with Swedish wives do. I’ve been upset with him over that, and I should probably here add that a lot of marriages here break up after the first child is born because the men and the women don’t agree to share (then they instead share the kid every other week). We’ve stuck it out though, because we love each other, are intelligent beings and share mostly the same views on life.

Thanks to all the sensible posters. For all you foreigners coming here: the weather is bad, you have been warned ;-) !

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Biochemist

November 21st, 2012 at 22:22

Oh, and I forgot to mention: we share the bills and have separate economies. I get the barnbidrag (child benefits) but I also buy all clothes for the cildren. Just in case anyone wondered :-) .

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Ivan

November 27th, 2012 at 05:13

@ biochemist. You just described American women, and the American way of life, women here are strong minded, and just like I approach a woman to start a conversation I have been approached as well (Don’t mean to brag but I have been approached more than the average Joe…^_~) For that matter I do not know of any countries (aside the Middle East, and perhaps some Latin American countries like Mexico) where couples do not share their responsibilities at home, and at the same time that is why American men are sought by women from other countries as well (And for their passport HA HA). But since you ARE Swedish, my question to you remains, are Swedish women “less” superficial, drama free, and more honest, than their American counterparts.

I was married before, and just like any other American married couple we shared everything except for one thing, cooking, my ex did not like how I cooked. We did not have children together but I actually “volunteer” to be the stay at home dad if the situation called for it, I do not know why that is such a big deal, or at least that’s how it sounded in your blog.

By the way you seemed to be locked on “looks” it is true that Swedish women are beautiful, but as I have seen so are Germans, Russians, Spanish, Venezuelans, Brazilians, Vietnamese even Californians (have to look for them but they are there!), I have met them all.

But something happens here (U.S.A) once you get here your mentality changes, and you are no longer content with what you have, but want more or want something else, and that goes for material things as well as people, this is where the “drama” comes in, and honesty tends to have various meanings.

Based on what you described “Swedish women find a lot of self-worth in working and earning a wage and do not fancy becoming someone’s cook or cleaner in the evening” It seems to me that Swedish women are trying to find a place in the world and make a stand for them selves, American women have long ago accomplished that.

And again it all comes down to this, I am already expecting to be with somebody who wants to be my equal. I am looking for somebody who can be my friend, and most of all be honest and loyal. Do you know if Swedish women are “less” superficial, drama free, loyal, and honest? What is their mentality towards a relationship like? (Aside wanting to share everything, I got that part already). Would they stand by their man, or are they trying to work the “I am my own woman” angle?

And if you are going to say that you know where I can find a woman like that who can obey my command, no, I do not want to move to Saudi Arabia, I prefer women who can think for themselves, and are loyal and honest because they want to be, and I am not moving to the Philippines either since I am not really attracted to Asian girls, though they are pretty. Finally, I do not mind the weather in Sweden as I am looking for some snow, to me that means more time in-doors if you know what I mean…

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Doug

January 1st, 2013 at 06:20

I have spent hours reading the comments to the posts today as it became more and more enlightening. I have traveled the world and was always interested in Sweden. After reading this and many other blogs I’ve decided to change a 10 day trip to Sweden and visit Germany again. I’d still love to go someday but, perhaps not to Stockholm and during a warm part of the year. It is just that I’m a major people person and it sounds rather sad and depressing to be around people so emotionally closed up and only concerned for their own tiny “monkey sphere” (google it if you don’t know). I can understand historical reasons and all but it sounds difficult for someone near 40 to meet new friends as I have done all over the world.

I wanted to point out a few observations in reading comments. First I saw a few people who had an overall unhappy negative tone talk about how Americans are fake always asking “how are you doing?”. Well if you had been in the USA very long you would realize that most Americans do not tend to hide how we feel at all. You are applying your own culture in assuming we are not actually happy or being our “REAL SELF” with you. Takes notes those who defend and glamorize your self proclaimed fake personas.

True in large cities people are in a hurry and maybe not friendly but rest assured most Americans when unhappy don’t walk around smiling and concerning themselves with your welfare. If I ask you “How are you doing?” it is because I am letting you know I care about you as a human being. If you answer terrible and I have any spare time even as a stranger I’d gladly do anything I could. This is real happiness and warmth that comes from small town America. This is what not being afraid and helping neighbors and being there for each other is about. Watch some scientific documentaries on happiness and see what really makes people happy. Then maybe you’ll understand just because you are bitter or miserable doesn’t mean I’m faking it.

Another funny thing is that the media’s concerns are really not generally anyone I’ve ever known in the 40 states I’ve been to concerns. So to say Americans are like this or that based on what you read in the news is probably something most of us don’t think about and inaccurate. Also I have met Europeans who don’t know the difference between North America and South America. However, I don’t go around trying to use one or two examples out anecdotal evidence to claim 100s of million of Europeans are dumb. This behavior actually makes you look dumb. I personally have never met anyone who didn’t know what Europe was in America but, I don’t disagree there are ignorant useless people out there.

Finally many many people trying to trash another nation here and I mean Americans included, are way off. The facts are just so wrong and inaccurate that I had many a great laughs. It would be best to listen to those who have been foreign countries and respect their opinions whether or not you agree. All those who comment on how terrible a country is and then list numbered facts that can be googled away as nonsense in 5 seconds make your contribution invalid. Also you are spreading lies into others who may believe you. Seriously why do people have to be an expert about a country they have never been to and are obviously filled with useless propaganda? I’d say every nation seems to have serious education issues.

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08

January 5th, 2013 at 12:16

@Doug: Isn’t kind of strange to call people out for basing their opinions on “what they read in the news” when you are basing your own opinions on what you read online instead of going to Sweden with an open mind?

And regarding Swedish women, sure they want someone who pays for everything and takes care of them. But asked them if they are willing to do the things that is expected of a wife in other countries and Swedish guys won’t seem so bad after all.

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Jack

July 28th, 2013 at 20:00

Hey,

I’ve recently been on vacation in America. I’m from the UK. During this holiday me and my friends met a couple of Swedish girls. We met up a couple of times for drinks and on the last night we slept together. The problem is I actually really like this girl and would like to see her again and be more than a one night thing. She gave me her number to get in touch afterwards but she only rarely replies to any messages. My question is, are Swedish women used to being chased? Or is the fact she only now and then replies to my messages mean she’s not interested? Any advice on how to approach from here would be appreciated :)

Thanks,

Jack

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Gwen

August 5th, 2013 at 18:13

I have enjoyed everyone’s thoughts. I’m a single American woman interested in finding a loving mate to start a family with. I’ve been contemplating doing the online dating thing, and I’ve been trying to identify the characteristics that most appeal to me in men. I’m tall, athletic (in spite of my relative inactivity), blue-eyed, and physically a bit of a throw-back to my Swedish great-grandfather’s family. I’m really a Northern-European American mutt.

I mention the physical traits that define me, but am most concerned with my over-all individual/cultural personality traits, and where I should be looking for a suitable match. Having grown frustrated seeking American men, I’ve wondered, are there men beyond my country’s borders that would make me happy? Perhaps Sweden would be a nice place for me to meet someone? Or at least someone as large/tall as me? I’ve known wonderful Swedish and Scandinavian men… all living abroad!

After reading so many comments, I feel like I’ve gained some insight about seeking partners based on their nationality, and that is: Finding the right mate is maddening and magical wherever you search!

@Doug I appreciate your defense of American sincerity. Also, I feel lucky beyond words having been born female in the USA!

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Jerry Howe

October 30th, 2013 at 18:50

Yes,

Aoof Scandinavian women are masking a deep insecurity on the inside.
Don’t be put off by it.
If they were as strong as they appear to be, they would be more open and flexible on the outside. The smugness is just a front.

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Victor

December 19th, 2013 at 18:20

I don’t know if this is considered “research”. And i am guessing you asked swedish girls from Stockholm? Because the things you stated in ur blog kinda tells you what kind of person those girls were. Arrogant and self-obsessed. Most of the guys i know are really outgoing, do not drink much at all but spends more time at the gym.

Reading these blog-entries they all come down to the same thing: swedish guys are shy, not very manly and drinks alot. As a swedish man i find this highly frustrating because i don’t recognize these things at all. I talk to women, my friends talk to women, we are manly but we are not assholes. I hold the door for everyone, guys/women it has nothing to do with gender, it’s called being polite.

The things i would call out on swedish guys are probably that we’re obsessed with looks. Since we’re a shallow people (girls/boys) we pay much attention to how we look. For example i’ve seen american dudes that dont care AT ALL about their apperances, don’t fix their hair, no proper clothes etc, and still end up with good looking women. I always say, if those american women would come to sweden, they would be shocked with how fit/good looking/sensitive but manly a swedish guy is. Not shy, drunk and boring. But hey, focus on the negatives.

As for the foreign thing, forget it if you’re a middle-eastern/african man. Swedish girls like their americans/italians/french. The racism in Sweden has skyrocketed since 2000 and while we men would not mind to date foreigners i think the women are more conservative cus of the “rape”-generalization that swedish women make of men of color. Simply put, they would not feel safe dating an arabic/african man cus they think he’s a rapist. That’s what i’ve gathered from living in a small town, medium-sized town and now Uppsala.

And i have encountered people from all over the world while studying with swedish girls, and they are certainly not looking for that foreigner in the corridors but the swedes playing icehockey.

So while this may be accurate in Stockholm (cus lets face it, most of the girls in Stockholm are arrogant and shallow) i think in Sweden as a whole, you will find it difficult.

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Kari

January 9th, 2014 at 21:05

It was refreshing to read the posts by Victor, Bjorn, and others who refuted the stereotypical images of Swedish men and women on this blog. I spent 3 months one summer, plus part of another summer in Sweden, and met a lot of people, mostly by hitch-hiking from the far north to south and back on several occasions. I met a lot of mostly very talkative and interesting men, and also enjoyed extended visits with some of them, so I got to know them in a little more depth.

The only man who fit the “emotionally distant” description was one who, sadly, had been traumatized by the death of his mother when he was very small. So what Bjorn says is right, imo; someone who has even a couple of the characteristics on the article’s list is someone who is outside the norm and has emotional problems.

Of the guys I got to know fairly well, none drank to excess, or at all while I was with them. They enjoyed good conversation. Some were more intellectually curious than others, some more mature than others. But most weren’t the shy, repressed types that this blog promotes as typical. Nor were they obsessed with their looks. All were average-looking, one was overweight. I can only conclude that all the “gorgeous” men this site discusses are in Stockholm. Same regarding the women–I only met average-looking women, and the young ones in the north, at least, tended to be pudgy, though I didn’t meet many. I’m only saying there’s a lot of variety of types in Sweden, as in any country.

I think this blog sets up a false dichotomy between men/dating in the US, vs. Sweden. The fact is that men in the US are more or less evenly divided between shy guys who can’t manage to approach women, and more confident guys who do. In the US, contrary to popular belief, women often do the approaching. They may be a little more subtle about it sometimes, but women often are the ones who initiate a relationship. Men do, too, but it’s not accurate to give the impression that all or even a large majority of men in the US make the first approach. Similarly, in Sweden, there’s a mix of men who are outgoing and initiate contact with women, and those who are shy.

You might be surprised at how many US men expect the woman to pay her own way on a date, too. Especially young men in a depressed economy can’t afford to pay for two people on every date, it just isn’t realistic, especially for college students, those who are seeking jobs, or who are in a minimum-wage job. And they shouldn’t have to pay the woman’s expenses, especially if she’s employed. Dating customs in the US are in a tremendous state of flux and can’t be described with sweeping generalizations. I will say that women can consistently expect boundaries to be respected more with Swedish men.

Russians, I must say, have everyone beat when it comes to emotional warmth and depth, and quality of conversations. With the exception of a few of the young people, who can be very jaded and materialistic, they make everyone else in the West look shallow, lol! And they’re FUN and energetic! I did find the concept of “fun” to be a bit lacking in Sweden. Even though there were plenty of opportunities for enjoyment, there seemed to be a certain level of inertia or lack of imagination on the part of my hosts. Maybe that’s part of the Scandinavian “reserve” the blog talks about.

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