It is just our culture that the girls chose the guys. A guy can at most try bring attention to himself and hope to be picked. Sure, some girls like the more aggresive flirting guys but some girls will take offence to this, it’s intruding on their independence, they want to feel in control.

Also I think social acceptance of your partner is a big thing, it’s very bad if your friends don’t get along with your partner. This can really ruin things. This can lead to a lenghty period of “secret” dating where both parts in the potential couple try figure out how their friends think about the situation.

I can take, as an example of swedish romance, the way I met my own girl. I’ll try keep it short. I met this girl at a huge event with lots of people and realized some week later that I was really in love with her.
Instead of flirting with her directly I make sutble contacts with her closest friends to try get to know more about her, this also gives them the opportunity to “ok” me for her. As it turns out they thought I seemed pretty nice and told me a few important things about my love interest and when I told them how I really felt about her they went supportive. This is a quite common thing in sweden, let’s call it “insiders”.
The next thing was getting my own (the closest ones atleast) to understand the situation and give them the opportunity to say what they think about the girl in question. As it turned out they thought she seemed very nice aswell. They could be called “wingmen”.
After a few weeks of quite casual talking to the girl in question backed up with sweet comments about me from her friends, who also send me short reports of how she seems to feel about me, we finally meet face to face (we happen to live quite far away from each other) in another huge event, sort of like a festival.
By now I sort of know how the girl is feeling about me, Ialso have a huge team of supporters who know what’s going on. And sure enough my and her friends seem to “dissapear” now and then on made up errands and things, to give us plenty of alone time together. Lots of winking and knowing glances are exchanged with lots of people. In the end it turned out awesomely,lots of cute holding hands, walks along the beach and romantic kisses by the sunset.

Now this was from my point of view. As it turns out she had done almost exactly the same thing, she also had insiders and wingmen, some of them turned out to be the same people I confessed to. In the end it turns out she had planned the whole thing even more, and for a longer time, then I did and in a way, I totally fell in her trap. ;)

Of course, sometimes it’s just love on first sight too.

Don’t stalk him,don’t be a puppy dog..just drop hints here and there,or if confident enough, smack him right in the face as above. Guys sometimes need and appreciate a good smack in the face for the right reasons! ;)

@Jen I have to agree with you; the Swedish smile is rare, but very enjoyable when you see it! Love that you took photo evidence. Smart move.

I think I just need to get over myself and just approach any guy I find attractive and who is performing the Swedish Male Look on me, especially since its common for both genders to do so. Would you agree with that assessment Elias? That its cool for women to approach men here? Tack everyone.