I met a little swede a few months ago while I was still living in the US and for the one time in my life, I made a move on him. He was already living in the states for the past eight months but, that really doesn’t change swedish ways; especially male swedish mating ways.
So the backstory: I went to the Scandinavian happy hour; it was of course full of $3 spatens, 80 beers on tap, and many many Swedish men (a couple token Norwegians and women were around too). When I first met my little swede*, Þórbjörn, I was introduced by another mutual friend who happened to be an insane Norwegian lacking a filter on his mouth (that’s another story). I was jokingly introduced as the mistress girlfriend and of course the Swedes in this group of five, giggled. Yes, the men giggle. And then everyone introduces themselves in a typical fashion but then Þórbjörn here, says hi and gives the swedish male look. It is THE look for a swedish man interested in a woman. They refuse to accept the existence of such a look, but it does indeed exist.
THE Swedish Male Look
What is it? Ladies, you know the look you give a man in the bar/restaurant/party etc that you’re interested in him? You look at him, make eye contact, smile shyly, look away, look back at him, and turn away. That, is basically the look a Swedish man gives.
He is an expert at staring at the floor even when none is in line of sight. He will look at you very shyly, smile a little, bat his eyes and look down at the floor at the same time, then look back up at you. I call the ‘devil in a sheep’s outfit’ look. It’s very innocent and endearing but you know and he knows, there are very naughty intentions behind it.
This look is the definite sign of trouble. Ladies in Sweden, if you get this look, you either move in for the kill or move on. He’s played his move with his shy, quiet Nordic self; he’s waiting for you now. It’s subtle. He already drank a few beers and mustered up the courage to give you the look. So, you better your know it.
And if you can recognize the swedish male look, you’ll know how to hunt down any Swede you want. And if you are timid with men, like myself, well you are partly screwed. This is Sweden after all, and the women pick up the men.
Välkommen till Sverige.
*Since the little swede doesn’t have a very Swedish name in real life, I’m going to give him one: Þórbjörn. Okay, that’s Icelandic but whatever. Or maybe Pehr.
Hmm… bettar a “look” than someone barfing on your shoes.
And we here on the Klaki think Swedish men are outgoing and polite.
You would obviously never survive here. hehehe :)
Best of luck.
kv. Ragnheiður
Barfing is a bad way to hit on a girl for sure.
If the Klaki think the Swedish men are outgoing, then I am definitely screwed there. Luckily, I live here.
Ragnheiður, how does anything happen in Iceland?
good god girl?youre hilarious! i love your writings and will defn keep stopping by. just wanted to say hi to put a face to one of your readers.
Thanks Aingeal! Do stop by, even though I can be lame and not post as often as I should.
hej
Yes, this look is a definite sign of trouble, this shy swedish boys know how to turn on the charm.
The problem with this boys is that the dating “process” can be long and confusing, so you have to be patient. I ‘m mexican and in the beginning i was completely lost with this swedish men.
Good luck
What a classic! i love this post :-) i read it sneakily at work and had to stop myself from having a laughing fit! It really rings true, this subtlety. When i met my first Swede, i thought it was cute and endearing, but to be honest, i think that “look” is not isolated and it comes with a whole package of shy, non-conflictive behaviour… which can be good sometimes, and others, well!!!
Thanks again for the read!
Raiha
Hey there, you seem to know a lot about Swedish men and would like your advice on one! I went to college in Wales with a really hot, model-looking swede but w actually never spoke to one another. Some months ago, that is about 2 years after college, now both in our 2nd year at University, I saw him at a club in London. I mentioned to some girlfriends of mine that I went to college with him and wasn’t sure if I should say or not as we’d never said a word to each other. My friends convinces me to and so I went up to him and the conversation went like this;
Me: “Hi, you are Jonathan right!? We went to college together…”
Jon: “Yes, I thought you looked familiar but I’m sorry can’t remember your name…..
Me: Lala….
We chatted a bit about Uni and went about dancing with friends. We then ended up dancing near each other and he grabbed me and started to dance with me! He was being a bity touching and staring right into my eyes and all I could think was “Oh my God, I’m actually going to kiss the hottest guy from college”. But the problem was I still wasn’t sure if we was attracted to me as I’m black and a friend of mine from college once heard he was racist and I personally always assumed he wasn’t attracted to anything “exotic”. Anyway I decided to make a move and kissed him and it was amazing…..we pulled for about 15 to 20 mins straight! Anyway the club was about to close so we decided to go home, I had to get my coat from the cloakroom so he said to meet him outside! I did some minutes later….we had a bit of an awkward chat as he is quite a shy guy (as I have heard). He offered to drop me off at him but I said I was taking a cab! Some days later I added him on facebook, sent him a massage saying something along the lines of it was random but nice seeing someone from college and so on….He replied saying it was random but fun! So I thought that was a good sign! Anyway we sent some few more msgs to each other and at some point he asked me when I was going to be in London, I said that weekend for my dad’s birthday and he sent me a polite but short reply saying cool and to have a nice weekend so all hopes of seeing him that weekend had been thrown out the window! Some days later when I was in London, my friends from University called and asked if I was meeting up with Jon and I said no, as he didn’t seem interested in that! They tried to convince me to ask him out to coffee but I said I couldn’t. They ended up convincing me to mention to him that I was going to be at a club and if he was interested to give me a text! He never replied to the msg and I felt shitty for the nest few weeks! I eventually got over it! But been thinking about him lately and I was wondering what I could have done different!? Have any idea?
(Sorry this is long)
Thanks
xxox
I stumbled upon this website by accident; I was Google-ing Swedish men (as I’m utterly obssessed with them after recently meeting 4 or 5 of them at random intervals) and you’re so right. There is a definitive LOOK.
Initially I thought this blog would be about their typical characteristics, i.e. blonde hair & blue eyes but as I read on I was surprised to read that they actually have another “type” of look.
It’s so true. The look my Swede gave me still peirces my thoughts every time I think about him.
He didn’t really look down at the ground – but he gave me this strange, hesitant look followed by a smile which made my knees wobble. That smile defined his intentions clearly however the hesitant look was as if he was battling his politeness with the desire to rip my clothes off.
All Hail xxSwedishxx Men!
xxx
I truly beleive we do it unknowingly. I am Swedish and damn that is the way I flirt and never realized it is a trait I thought it was just me.
“I call the ‘devil in a sheep’s outfit’ look. It’s very innocent and endearing but you know and he knows, there are very naughty intentions behind it.”
Naughty intentions! Ok I am starting to feel slightly better about this Swedish men idea.
Just like Rick said. Im Swedish and i too do “the look”. But i never thought it was this common. I wonder why?
Is there anything else that swedish men do besides the look? Smiling…?